Relationships are far from easy. Long distance relationships (LDR) are even harder, and it takes more out of both you and your partner. Rather than give up what could be an awesome opportunity based solely on the distance, here are a few ways to keep a LDR strong.
The most important part of a LDR is to be on the same page as your partner. The relationship is bound to fail if the two of you want different things. You should come up with some sort of plan of what you need from each other and decide the best to go about being there for each other.
Make your presence obvious. I have found that small surprises are simple ways to bring about a smile, no matter how many miles apart you are. Something that never fails is ordering a pizza to be delivered to him wherever he is. Send a text giving him a little heads up: Already tipped the driver, enjoy! Everybody loves a surprise pizza. If the pizza guy isn’t being difficult, try to get them to write something on it with a topping.
Reach out to his friends. When he and his friends are out at the bars, make them want him to focus on you. The worst would be for you to come off as “that girlfriend that lives 1,170 that keeps Steve from having any fun.” Make his friends look forward to your visits also. It’ll make him feel luckier to have you around when his bros approve of you. You will have to put in a bit more work on your end (asking about his friends, keeping in touch with them) but you will feel a lot more comfortable when you’re not together and you’ll have a lot more fun when you visit.
Give each other small memories: When the going gets tough, something as small as the smell of your partner can be comforting. Wear his t-shirts to bed and keep a photo in your purse. If you guys care about each other enough, a small reminder of you will be enough to keep him wanting more and keep working towards the two of you.
Schedule LD Dates: It’s still possible to do things together despite the oceans and states separating you. Look up when movies are playing that you would normally watch together. Schedule a time that you would watch it at the same time. You will feel closer and you’ll have something to talk about after. Try to video chat. Seeing each other is a big part of dating someone, so take lots of pictures and send them to each other. You see a cool motorcycle on the street that you know he wants? Picture message it to him and tell him you can’t wait to ride on it with him. It’s important to remind each other that you’re thinking about each other. Another way of doing this is writing each other love letters. A physical note is something that you can keep in your wallet and look at when you need a little strength to keep going.
Find the perks of LDR: It’s obviously awesome to see each other every day, but sometimes you run out of things to talk about. Spend time with your friends and family and remember funny stories to tell each other later. The best feeling is talking at the end of the day and hearing nothing but excitement when you have so much to say to each other.
Enforce healthy lifestyles for each other: It’s hard to impact each other’s daily actions when you don’t see each other. Set up competitions: Who can run the most miles a week? Who can eat a healthier lunch? Find a good book and read it at the same time. It’s important to make sure that you still have a positive impact on your partner no matter how far away he is.
Make your time together worth it: If you guys trust each other enough, you will feel nothing but excitement on that plane ride to go see him. Don’t hide your feelings and make sure that you talk everything through in a civil manner so that when you see him, you have nothing but butterflies- the good kind.
The most important way to have a successful LDR is to have faith and hope in your relationship and in each other. It is by no means easy, but put your strength together and you can definitely make it.
What are your experiences of LDRs? Yay or nay?
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