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Woman in the gym

Source: John Fedele / Getty

The whole world is going to starting to warm up into the coveted summer months, and I’m sitting at my desk feeling like I ate winter.

Headlines and hashtags like #summerbodiesaremadeinthewinter, unkept new years resolutions and promotional gym membership discounts are haunting my subconscious.

I’m on day two of my 1500th “Get it right, Get it tight” plan, feeling so behind before I even reach the starting line.

Then I realized something:

If I were my own best friend, I would be such a hater.

Nothing is ever good enough. Any “progress” I make means nothing. If I lose one pound, I hate on the ten I haven’t lost. If I eat one damn cookie, I want to die even though I’ve been eating healthy all week.

As I embark on this entire lifestyle change (mind, body, and soul), I’ve decided to silence my inner hater.

One of the greatest enemies to my progress has always been the insecurity that comes with actually trying.

When I know I’ve let myself go, months of inactivity become super comfortable because it’s like, of course my belly is rolling over my jeans like that, I don’t work out.

NOW, let that belly roll over my pants when I’ve been 1) Only eating kale 2.) Squatting like crazy 3.) running like my freedom depended on it–and we have a HUGE problem.

All of my self motivation turns into self hate as I drown in insecurity, cupcakes and cellulite.

But not this time.

I made a vow today to love myself through the process. When I gain weight even after weeks of working out, I will love myself. When I eat a cookie because I’m on my period and I just don’t give a f*ck, I will love myself. When I can’t keep up with the woman in the workout video, I will love myself. When my stretch marks are climbing up my stomach, I will call them love lines.

I’m vowing to be on my own team this time. Will you?

Talking to myself like:

 

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