Singer Mario recently ran into troubles with the law after he and his mother got into an altercation at her home. Details surfaced that Mario’s mother is addicted to drugs and a large part of the altercation stemmed from Mario’s efforts in trying to prevent his mother from doing drugs. This is not the first time that the two have came to blows over her addiction.
“Mario was charged with second degree assault after police were called to Shawntia Hardaway‘s Baltimore apartment. She alerted the authorities that Mario, 24, was inside her apartment damaging property. According to police, Shawntia claims Mario started yelling at her and pushed her in her chest which caused minor pain. A broken china cabinet, mirror and busted door were also discovered at the scene.”
My heart burns for Mario and his situation with his mother, as I too have family members who have fallen victim to the monster that is crack cocaine. I empathize with his wanting to do whatever it takes attitude to prevent his mother from losing her life to drugs but to what end? At what point do you give up on a person who no longer wants to be saved? A person who is so deep in their own personal abyss that they cannot see an end to it.
You can answer the question in one of two ways. One being that Mario is a successful singer who has his entire life ahead of him. He should not risk his life or career being put to an end for the sake of saving someone who does not want to be saved; even if that person is his own mother. The second way is that Mario only has one mother. It does not matter how successful he is or may become, his bond with his mother is everlasting and he should do whatever it takes to cement that bond and to save her. It is his duty to her.
There is no right or wrong answer to this. My heart understands the attachment that Mario has to his mom. Crackhead or not that still and always will be his mother. Violence is never the answer but I also understands his frustrations with her. It is in a child’s nature to want their parents to be healthy and happy. The reverse can also be said for parents and their feelings towards their children. In that realm, I would encourage Mario and any other child who has a parent who is addicted to a substance to never give up on them.
Then there is the more rationale side of me that knows that people who are on a downward slide in their life can sometimes drag those who are the closest to them down as well. They do not necessarily do it purposely but they are so immersed in their own filth that they cannot prevent it from seeping over unto others. The fear that this “filth” might somehow affect Mario and others close to his mother is what would lead me to encourage him to distance himself from her and allow her to live her life as she sees fit. I would say never stop loving her, but never allow her issues to affect your life any more than they have. Even if that means giving her distance and letting her make her own decisions in regards to her own life.
As I mentioned earlier, when it comes to matters of the heart, there is not one right answer. Those of you who are reading this and may have experienced a situation similar to this with a family member probably can relate more to the heart wrenching dilemma that this entails.
Up For Discussion: When a family member is on drugs and never is able to or wants to get off, at what point do you give up on them? Should you ever give up on them? How far would you go to save a family member on drugs?
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