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As much as we like to think “it’s over” is final in relationships, we often find ourselves trying to keep even the tiniest flame lit. Let’s face it, it’s not easy to let go of someone that was everything for so long. But how plausible is it to give romance a second chance?

I have to admit, the idea of a “couple comeback” sounds incredibly romantic. The first time around you might have noticed the few parts about your guy that don’t fit as perfectly as your fingers do when you’re holding hands. That doesn’t always mean that you need to write him off forever. You’ve kept his letters scattered across your room for a reason. Take a few years apart and do your own thing. Dating other guys might just show you how compatible you and Guy #1 were. If you come back in two years and he is no longer careless and you are no longer anxious, you just might be able to get through the problems that were holding you back in the first place.

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Sometimes, however, take-two at a relationship is not even worth it. Based on my own and my friends’ experiences, there are definitely a few “relationship no-no’s” that are not even worth sticking your feet in again. For example, if he was abusive or too aggressive toward you, it’s probably not worth the effort to try again. While people can definitely get through their aggressive behavior, it’s not a good idea to go back to a relationship that scarred you.

You generally know when a relationship is actually said and done. Your intense chemistry with your ex might not fade as quickly as you’d like it to. You still might want to share your details with him rather than the new guy that you’ve been going on some dates with. Use your breakup as time to explore, learn, and grow. If you see a future for some re-romance, go for it- you’ve already experienced a painful breakup and have grown from it. You might just find a great relationship hidden in the break-up and make-up.

What are your thoughts on re-romancing? Is it best to just cut people out and never look back? Or do you think that you should be open to people changing and relationships working out the second time around?

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