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There is one subject that never seems to escape my girlfriends and I, and that is boys, or men for those who are deserving. Everyday it seems one girlfriend or another is having issues with her man. Most of the time it is easy for me to diagnose. My girlfriends dread the “Define the Relationship” talk. A DTR can be a girls worst enemy or best friend, but either way it at least takes you out of the unknown, grey area that many girls find themselves in.

Why is it so important to have that talk, though? If a “relationship” is going along at a steady clip and everyone seems happy, why disrupt a good thing? The answer is quite simple, eventually one of the partners is going to look to take that relationship to the next level and if the other partner doesn’t see it that way there will be problems. Nothing sets me off like one of my girlfriends saying “We are…whatever,” when talking about their relationship. If you don’t know what you are or even if you are in a relationship, of course there will be problems.

The DTR talk allows people to save months of wondering and debating what will come. Also, by setting the goals straight away it could save the heartbreak of finding out your dream man sees you as a friend with benefits. If both partners have the same expectations the only problems should come if one person readjusts their expectations. I am not saying you will have the perfect relationships just by defining your expectations, however it will at least save you that stress.

Have you ever had the DTR talk? Let us know how it went!

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For 2024’s iteration of MadameNoire and HelloBeautiful’s annual series Women to Know, we knew we wanted to celebrate the people who help make the joys of film and television possible. To create art is to create magic. This year, we spotlight Hollywood Executive’s changing the face of cinema.