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Dear Kareem,

A good friend of mine has recently begun dating a guy who is super effeminate. Think Ru Paul meets Paul Mooney. He walks, talks and twirls like a woman. The first time I met him was at a dinner party and he strutted in late, swooshed towards me and exclaimed “honey, your car’s getin’ towed!!” and then snapped his fingers in my face and swooshed away. He is funny, loud and super extra. Everyone thinks he is gay but no one can prove it… my friend does not believe he is gay. She said he is one of the best lovers she’s ever had and they are now talking about getting married. She is actually the happiest I have ever seen her. Do you think I should pull her aside and caution her? Or do you think I should mind my own business?

Kareem Says:

If everything you say is accurate, there is a 99.9999% chance he is gay. I’m sorry but straight guys don’t snap fingers, swoosh away or address strangers with “honey, your car’s gettin’ towed!” My grandmother always said if too many people say the same thing about someone, it’s probably true.

But seriously, if she is happy, let her be. Mind your own business. It’s not your place to question or crush her. Maybe she knows deep down that he isn’t straight and doesn’t care. Or maybe she is so enamored by him, that she is blind to his ways. Either way, let her find out own her own. Just be prepared to console her if and when she walks in while he’s in the middle of a “Manwich.”

Got a question for Kareem? Email him at Kareem.JenkinsNYC@gmail.com!

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