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black woman on computerDear Gay Best Friend,

I met this guy online after I decided to get on Myspace for the first time in over a year.

He left comments on my photos a while back and I decided to email him and see how he was doing. He moved up north and he asked me to text him. I am currently in a relationship, but it is not going well at all. He was aware and still wanted to talk to me.

Pack up and move on

We texted back and forth and he sent me a picture of his “thang.” He asked me to do the same, which I reluctantly did. I have never done anything like that in my life, but he was so fine and saying all the right things. Plus he is FINE!

So the sexting continues and progresses into videos. Until last week when i stopped hearing from him. We were texting everyday. What should I do? I texted him good morning on two different days and got no response. He was texting me constantly.

Now I feel horrible because there are naked pics and videos of me and they are in the hands of someone who can’t communicate with me. I am too embarrassed to tell me friends. I am on Facebook now but I’m not sure if I should try to friend him. I am pissed and confused. Help a sista out. – Texting Disaster

“I Met A Pastor Online & I’ve Learned He’s Married & Does This All The Time”

Dear Ms. Texting Disaster,

That’s what the hell you get!! SMDH!

I swear you birds will do anything for attention. Who in the hell starts texting some random dude they met online, and then begin sexting, and then your hot ass sends naked pictures and videos and you have no idea who they are? You really are special. You really are pecking the ground with your beak. Ugh! I could strangle you!

And, who in their right mind is on Myspace???

Girl, this is clearly a wake up call for you. I hope your dumbass learned a lesson from all of this.

I truly refuse to believe that there are people in the world, like you, who lack that much common sense. Wait a minute? Yup, you do lack common sense. I can clearly see through that bald spot in your weave directly to your small ass brain.

Please tell me why the hell you’re sending your naked narrow ass pictures to some random dude because you say, “He is fine!” Do you even know if that is really him that you sent your pictures to? And, do you know if the pictures he sent of his, “thang,” were really pictures of his “thang?” I mean, you two never met in person. So, you don’t know who you were sending your pictures to, do you?

Now, you’re sitting over there with remorse and shame because your nasty ass exposed yourself to some dude who can put all your business out in the street. The same dude who is now M.I.A. (Missing In Action) after he got what he wanted from you. So, what do you want him to do? Send you back the pictures and videos and issue you an apology? LMBAO! I can’t today. Please baby Jesus make it stop.

But, hold on, didn’t you say that you were in a relationship with someone? So, why the freak are you texting, sexting, and sending naked pictures and videos of yourself to some other dude? You really are thirsty. Stop drinking the nut juice young lady. It’s not good for you. Yes, it has plenty of protein and they say it’s good for your skin, but stop digesting it.

Listen up folks! I’m going to issue this warning once, and once only. Do not respond to some random person off the internet who hits you up and asks you to start texting them. Why the hell would you give out your number to someone whom you’ve never met in person and that you don’t know? They are a stranger. And, what’s the saying you learned when you were younger and a stranger approached you, “STRANGER DANGER!”

Do not respond to some random person off the internet who hits up with naked pictures of themselves and they ask you to send some of yourself. Uhm, you do know that people can lift other people’s photos and naked pictures from off the internet and pass themselves off as their own. They can make up a whole complete profile and identity for themselves and you wouldn’t know the difference. STOP RESPONDING TO FOLKS YOU DON’T KNOW ON THE INTERNET.

Do not, and I mean DO NOT send naked pictures or videos of yourself to folks over the internet if you don’t want the pictures to be made public. Hell, don’t even take naked pictures of yourself with your camera phone and have them saved on your phone. It’s a recipe for disaster. Haven’t you all learned anything from the celebrities who get caught up in these naked pictures texting scandals? And, what do you all say when you read about them on the blogs, after you’ve looked at the pictures? “They are so damn stupid. Why they hell would they send their naked pictures to some jump-off and think they won’t expose them?” Yeah, exactly. So, why don’t you think it will happen to you? What makes you exempt from this behavior?

Also, Ms. Freak-A-Leak, do you even know if the anonymous dude is of legal age to be receiving naked pictures of you? Is he over 18? You do know that sending naked pictures to a minor is a felony and you could be charged with child pornography? Ole dumbass! I swear you’ll learn. Take notes and let this be a lesson for you. Now, get yourself in someone’s school and get you some education. Stop running after dudes on the internet because they are “FINE!” How about you run to the store and get you some common sense and street smarts so this won’t happen again? – Straight From Your Gay Best Friend

Make sure to get your copy of my new book,  Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15). It is available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!

Click on the “LIKE” button of Terrance Dean’s Facebook Page, click  HERE!

You can follow Terrance Dean on Twitter, click  HERE!

You can also visit Terrance Dean’s website to find out more about him, click  HERE!

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