So Chris Brown and Tyga released a mixtape last night called ‘Fan of a Fan’ and on one track Chris tries to fool us all by naming it “Ain’t Thinking About You” but he clearly IS thinking about “you” – if “you” means Rihanna.
“We done been together for a minute / now it feels funny to be doing something different / but it’s all good, me and you finished / you got a ball player but a n**** ain’t trippin’ / and I ain’t sayin’ that he don’t love you / but I don’t think he love you like I do / But it’s okay, it’s alright, my blackberry’s filled with a whole bunch of women”
But this isn’t the first time Chris Brown has attempted to get his ex back through song. We’ve heard the old adage, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again” but someone on Brown’s management team should have told him that it doesn’t apply when the only thing you’re succeeding at is public humiliation. Here are four more of his failures.
AUGUST 2009 – “Changed Man”
Just six months after their much-publicized incident, Chris Brown releases his first apologetic gem. He hoped this would distract us from his probation sentencing, but instead we just shook our heads in unison, completely unaware of the fact that this track would be the first of many. Did she get your flowers, Chris?
“Ima make it up to you / And show the world / I’m a changed man / … / And everybody hates Chris / They can never understand / So can we love / Can we love again? / … / Saying I’m sorry / Doesn’t make it all right / I know, I know / But I believe that we can make it.”
SEPTEMBER 2009 – “Hollow”
We get it Chris. You’re empty, you’re incomplete, you’re hollow. It’s a very clever analogy. Has Rihanna called you back yet?
“Baby I’ll admit, I made a mistake / Don’t know what I was thinking / what I had was so great / … / Only so much I can take, this love is broken down / Come rescue me, I need your arms / Gently wrapped around / Say you need me.”
OCTOBER 2009 – “So Cold”
Out of all Chris’ leaked tracks, this one actually made his “Graffiti” album. And he made sure to place it within the first 5 songs, so that when Rihanna got the signed copy he sent her through jail mail, she’d hear it before the album bored her to sleep.
“Damn I want my baby back / It’s so cold without her / cold without her, she’s gone / Now I’m alone, no one to hold on / cause she was the only one / and I know I was dead wrong”
DECEMBER 2009 – “Famous Girl”
Around the end of the year, someone decided to hand Chris Brown back his manhood. He started feeling bold again. In fact, he released this vengeful little tune declaring how much of a catch he was. But no one agreed.
“‘Ye would’ve said you’re ‘So Amazing’ / So how could you be so ‘Heartless,’ girl? / ‘Live Your Life,’ take T-I-m-e / ‘Day and Nite,’ just like Kid Cudi / You’ll think of me, you will / Drake would say that you’re ‘The Best He Ever Had’…/ Keri woulda said my love ‘Knocks Her Down’ / Keyshia woulda told me I was ‘Sent From Heaven’”
Chris Brown, you lose.