Would you stay with your man if he cheated? What if it was a one-night fling? A one-year affair? Could you ever really forgive him?
Here are some things to consider:
First of all you have to come to terms with the fact that you probably had a gut feeling regarding this affair and chose to ignore it. Be honest with yourself and admit the reasons you feel you need this individual in your life despite their unfaithfulness.(Not wanting to be alone, financial support, he’s my kid’s father…) This is a good time to start writing.
Next, you have to decide whether this relationship will last if he does this again. This means there are no guarantees or even truths to his promises that it won’t happen again. Not saying it will, not saying it won’t. But here’s the honesty part on you: do you have enough trust to invest again,everyday,over and over again? Long after you both have talked it out and there are no more “I’m sorry’s” and the tears and “why’ s” have subsided? Forgiveness is a HEAVY,HEAVY burden that HAS to be picked up and carried EVERYDAY! And it gets heavier!! Especially when the person you are forgiving is not being “an easy forgivee.”
A man’s response to why women cheat
A lot is being assumed that the person who cheated is actually wanting to continue in the relationship. Encouraging him to be honest with you as to what he expects from you now and vice-versa is crucial. Don’t continue a relationship out of obligation, don’t continue lying to yourself. Talk about your hurt, if he can’t bear hearing you relive it then you might have an answer. Be willing to hear that he may actually blame you for his having cheated.(Yeah,really.)
Lastly, do not hold it over him. Do not be bitter.(It is easier said than done)but, if you choose to stay that means leaving that mistake in yesterdays wake and recommitting today. Do not be tempted to inflict the same hurt, cling to the love you have and squeeze it when you feel low. Take a time out when it’s necessary but invest emotionally, a little at a time, when your ready. Just… be honest with yourself.