I was originally given the assignment to tackle whether or not an office romance was something a HelloBeautiful reader should pursue but I decided to put the decision in your hands with a handy list of commandments to adhere to. The reason? I remain on the fence about office romances. I’ve seen office romances flourish and fail. I’ve also never had the guts to miss an important deadline to pursue cutie in accounting because you know what? He simply does not exist. I have always worked in environments with a limited or non-existent selection of whipped milk chocolate cuties and maybe seeing as though I have a sweet tooth that has been to my benefit. For the more fortunate eye candy saturated 9-5 hustlers, the ball is in your court. Only you can decide whether or not love has a place in the office walls and here is my advice for those who are considering and are living in that moment:
- Thou shalt not work in the same department: In a smaller office environment this may be impossible but the more space you have from your office romance during work hours the more productive you’ll be.
- Thou shalt not date your boss: This is a tough one, as most office romances occur between individuals who are on different levels of the corporate hierarchy. By dating your boss there will be issues of favoritism which could affect the reputation of your boss’s leadership skills leading to pressures in the office and eventually outside.
- Thou shalt not date a married co-worker: Word spreads quickly within office walls and you don’t know who is a friend with whom, so to avoid a Jerry Springer style showdown in your place of employment stick to the available co-workers, please.
- Thou shalt not meet in the bathroom for a quickie during a meeting or display an unusual amount of PDA (unless you don’t mind the possibility of getting reprimanded): One of my ultimate sexual fantasies involves an office and a tie, so I could only imagine how a hot 9-5 romance could get a little carried away. Play it safe and opt for an off-site rendezvous on lunch if you must!
- Thou shalt not get into details about your relationship once it is revealed you are together aka The ‘Bey & Jay’: Folks found it absolutely frustrating to interview Beyonce and Jay-z before and even after they got married because although you knew they were together they would reveal zilch about their relationship. Nothing wrong with teasing folks, your relationship is your business and no one else’s.
- Thou shalt have a conversation about “boundaries in place whilst at work” with your partner: Talk it out. Do you want this to be a relationship or affair everyone knows about? Who do you want knowing? Will there be lunch dates? Etc.
- Thou shalt keep it ‘strictly business’ between work hours: If there was an argument that started before you got in the office doors, guess what, it’s going to have to stay there. Your conversations amongst each other should be either work related or the usual everyday chitchat (weather, current events, what’s on TV tonight etc)
- Thou shalt socialize with others at work in order to keep balance in the relationship and avoid smothering each other: 9-5er’s spent most of their waking hours at work. It’s healthy to have relationships with others outside of a romantic one.
- Thou shalt keep paycheck particulars to thyself unless you are thinking of moving in together or are getting married: Until a serious relationship is formed where you have to disclose pay check particulars in order to maintain a household or some other investment together, make it a non-issue. Egos could get bruised and besides your compensation is supposed to be kept confidential.
- Thou shalt be supportive of each other’s career growth in terms of promotions and outside opportunities: In the nature of the corporate world, new opportunities come up and they wait for no one. It’s important to be supportive of your partner if they decide to pursue an opportunity elsewhere.
What are your thoughts on office romance?
Have you ever thought of or used your place of employment as a place to find a mate?
Do you agree or disagree with any of the Ten Office Romance Commandments?
About the author: Telisha Ng is a freelance writer and author of the Goddess Intellect blog from Toronto, Canada. Connect with her on twitter @goddess_I or send her an email firstname.lastname@example.org.