So, I was out the other day with a few of my girlfriends, basking in the glory of free time – ME time – to do whatever I wanted. On this particular day, I chose to go to a couple of lounges, have a few cocktails, and socialize with people without having to talk about diapers, potty training, tantrums, etc. Here I am in the middle of sipping a Patron margarita, dancing, smiling, taking pictures of myself (an old pastime of mine pre-baby), and then it happened.
Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” came on, and I beamed with happiness… not because I like throwing my hands up and singing along “uh oh oh uh oh oh oh”(though the song has grown on me)… but because all I could think about in that moment was my daughter. An image of her face popped in my head; I could imagine her reacting to hearing the beat drop as song come on and seeing the way her face just radiates. There I was, out to spend time enjoying myself and the rare occasion I have to just think about me, and all I could think about was her. It gets better – not only did I beam internally, but I proceeded to tell all my friends that Madison loves Beyonce and especially likes this song — I guess you can blame it on the alcohol.
Nope – not done yet –
I pulled my Blackberry out of my clutch and proceeded to update them with her latest pictures and say, “Look at my baby – love her!” Oh love and alcohol and how one makes you think about the other! [giggles] Seriously though, that is the nature of motherhood: no matter where you are, no matter who you are with, you are always thinking, always reflecting, often feeling guilty for taking a spare moment to do something other than mothering, and even when you do have your time its never really your own. I guess you just have to learn to love the awkwardness of the motherhood moments both on and off duty!
Celebrate yourself. Happy Mother’s Day — because Mother’s Day should be everyday!
Would you be a surrogate mother?
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