I don’t even know where to start… Ok, how about here: I hope Trey Songz makes it through to the end of “Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D,” alive! Sighs. Now that we’ve gotten that out the way, we can move on to the ridiculousness that is the 2013 remake.
Leatherface is back, and we wish for nothing more than to have Diane Von Furstenberg rip off his silly mask and make it into a cute skirt.
Tobe Hooper’s “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” first hit theaters in 1974. It scared the hell out of people with its gory effects and “based on a true story” plot. In 2003, if you are around the same age as me, you probably saw it for the first time, when movie studios released the Marcus Nispel-directed remake starring Jessica Biel. It proved to be equally as good as the original movie but then came the not-so-good 2006 remake.
And now, they’ve let the horse out the stable, to beat it again with “Texas chainsaw Massacre 3D.” As if you or I want to watch another three-dimensional film after “Piranha 3DD.”
The creators of “TCM” haven’t learned from other classic horror flicks, such as “Scream” or gems like “Freddy” and “Halloween,” that have been redone so many times they look like a plastic surgery nightmare!
Clearly, Hollywood has nothing else to do with their hot 20-somethings, besides place them in a house with a hot token black guy (cue Trigga), and torture them until their careers have no chance at revival.
Songz, plays the boyfriend of Alexandra Daddario. From, the two-minute clip you are about to watch, one thing is evident about his acting skills, and that is: he looks great with no shirt on. Not that I doubt he is a superb thespian, but you surely won’t don’t get a chance to witness it in this trailer.
Anyhoo, if you care to still watch the snippet, here you go:
Catch it in theaters, January 4, 2013.
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