It’s crunch time, red heart shaped boxes of chocolate, teddy bears, cinnamon heart candy and cushy cards have been shoved in all of our faces for weeks now. For many the pressure is on to get the perfect gift for a significant other, there are also a handful of us who could care less *raises hand* or perhaps we secretly wish we had a reason to care?!

Valentine ’s Day is my least favorite Hallmark holiday. Perhaps it’s from years of living in singleland, and receiving lame gifts when attached, or the anniversary I celebrated on that day with someone who is no longer in my life.

Forget about me for a minute, I dislike the way v-day excludes and divides single and attached folks, preying on already existing self-esteem issues.

It has me longing to go back to the good ole days in grade school; everyone was included when cards were distributed. You would go home, empty out your bag and get geeked off of silly cards and candy.

V-day as adult generally sucks if you’re not hitched in some way. There is simply no part in the fun for your single behind. V-day also sucks if you have a smothering no-good lover who uses the holiday to let his first date representative run the show, so you forget all the other wrong-doings.

This is not my usual positive patty demeanor, I realize this, but here’s the thing:

I realized that a day of love is not just about receiving gifts or showing how much you love someone by complying with Hallmark standards.

I’ve had the best v-days by doing things that embodies love, not prove it. One v-day I arranged dinner with family and friends and I felt not one inkling of loneliness.

Even now as I am in a new experience with someone special who has been around since my childhood I don’t want that pressure or energy surrounding us that says you need to shell out to prove your affection for me. Perhaps I was born on Mars, but this day of love should be about fun and togetherness, with a lover, friends and family. Call someone up you haven’t spoken to in a while, treat someone to dinner who you know has been having a tough time financially. Have the day work in your favor, not against you.

Happiness is living without expectations for specific reactions. It’s a new year, create your own traditions. As long as this Hallmark holiday exists, my fellow “v-day haters” and I might as well make the best of it!

How do you feel about Valentine ’s Day? Do you look forward to this holiday? Why or Why not?

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