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The “Birthday Sex” Girl’s Not White. And Why Do You Care So Much, Anyway?

By Hello Beautiful June 4, 2009 6:37 pm

A couple of days ago, I posted Jeremih’s “Birthday Sex” video for my PLAY OR SLAY? column. But instead of telling me whether or not the video sucks, the majority of the comments focused on the ethnicity of the main girl in the video.

What the hell?

For one thing, the column was about the video, not the girl. But I’m always open to hearing a good debate, so I’m willing to hear out all complaints. However, what’s with all these folks talking about her being white? She’s clearly not white, so pick another argument. Is it that she’s lightskinned, or “ethnically ambiguous”? Are we going to go into that again? Fine. But here’s my beef: why do you care so much? You didn’t produce the video. You’re not in the video. You don’t have to watch the video.

I DO think it sucks that there are video directors and artists who take preference over browner girls, and that’s really wack. But maybe I’m just an equal-opportunity employer, having two black parents of completely opposite skin tones and having crushed on or dated men of literally all ethnicities, and that could very well be why I think this debate is kind of bullshit. She’s just a pretty girl who beat out a bunch of other pretty girls to get the spot in this video. Maybe there were shadier things afoot in the making of the vid, but who knows? We weren’t there. I’m just kind of pissed at the fact that her racial ambiguity automatically makes her “white,” and therefore makes her “wrong.” That’s ignorance at its best. Or maybe I’m just sore because she reminds me of my little sister, who has green eyes and light skin and hair down to her butt, which has, on more than a few occasions, automatically made her “white” and thus “wrong.”

All I’m saying is, if you’ve got a good basis for bitching, by all means, do it. Go on – be mad that yet another light-skinned girl gets some shine over the millions of beautiful dark-skinned women out there. Be mad that the video just isn’t that good altogether and, to add insult to injury, they’re using a woman of “preferred”  skin tone as its main focus.  But if you’re going to rant, get your facts in order before you run around spouting hate. Cause at the end of the day, all this chick did was get paid.

TAGS: ambiguity, birthday sex, dark skinned, jeremih, light skinned, music videos, race, white girls
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  • missstrings43
    missstrings43
    7-3-2009 12:19 pm

    I had to post again to better express and explain my views about your crappy article…
    Although definitely loving the song and all (or at least MOST of it’s contents in the video)… I was very disappointed as my daughter was as well that a black woman was not the essence of the birthday sex… Why was that? I received an invite from the singer here on BP and accepted. I even put it the song on my page for a few days because I loved the groove,…however.. I had not seen the video yet. OMG!..At first, I thought it was a light skinned sista’ with straight hair..(you know…well processed).. and thought nothing of it but….oh crap..my daughter saw it on tv for the first time and went off. The first thing she did was get really close to the tv screen and then ..(***that did it!!!***)…Quote: “Why she got to be WHITE!” I gasped and looked again. Her hair was straight but the eyes gave it alll away….My stomach dropped because ..see..we live in Phoenix, Az (and alll we see here are all of our black men walking comfortably in the arms of WHITE woman here). Hell!..the Mexican’s don’t even stand a chance in Arizona…so.. with that…to see another NEW artist who happens to be a BLACK male is like another slap in the face. Every time the video comes on now, my daughter changes the channel because it is a blue (green) eyed devil on the screen. She is very very annoyed about it. When I look at her point of view of it now, I am sorta feeling her. Just my opinion however of which I AM entitled. The song is a hit. I just wished there was a sexy birthday chocolate woman in it with a sexy chocolate man.

    And to add to insult, this Alyson Mance says that it’s ignorance..WOW! I wonder if she is sista’ who is actually experiences this hell! Hmmmm….

    Another DUHHHH..moment….

    (and then you post it on BlackPlanet and give a shot out to allll of the beautiful BLACK women???????)???????

    Hugh!?!?

    lolove

    Strings43

  • missstrings43
    missstrings43
    7-3-2009 11:47 am

    I do care! I hate the dam video. It should have been a sexy chocolate woman in that damnnnn video. I don’t give a hoot if she is not ALLL white..she is still a blue eyed devil….Not cute!

  • bbblkwoman44dd
    bbblkwoman44dd
    6-11-2009 9:13 pm

    Man forget that nonsense why they all gotta be skinny? Let a big girl shine from time to time. ya dig

  • Sexiireddoo9
    Sexiireddoo9
    6-11-2009 1:19 am

    WHY ARE WE SEPERATING OURSELVES IN OUR OWN RACE BECAUSE OF WHAT SOME BUS**T ASS RAPPERS THINK OR FANTISIZE????? YEA THINK ABOUT THAT

  • sekoo63
    sekoo63
    6-10-2009 7:46 pm

    people that don’t love themselves cannot accept others so may strive to find someone “different” from them.

    i am distressed when i see dark brown women pushing around strollers with pale babies that look nothing like them and the rest of their family. it’s the worst kind of self hate. rappers and producers are just as gulity of that type of self hate. money cant buy you self esteem.

    love yourself and don’t worry about what someone else has. GOD don’t make mistakes. HE put the first people that walked on this planet in Afrika. many would like to forget that.

  • LaDawnThEGreaT1
    LaDawnThEGreaT1
    6-10-2009 1:16 pm

    yeah, the light dark thing. people feel so strongly about that right? well me personally i take em any color. i likes em all. i just love men. people like what they like. its been this way for years. no need to trip now. people should just be comfortable with who they are and what they see. oh yeah, back n the day there used to be a lot of dark skinned women in videos. look em up. i dont care im dark and i love my color, i got light brown eyes, curly hair and a curvy body. and i gets play… i dont care bout the skin issue. but readin yalls comments is keep me busy, thanks!!

  • cicily28
    cicily28
    6-10-2009 12:09 pm

    FIRST OFF BLACK IS BEAUTY…AND I DONT CARE WHAT NO ONE SAYS!!!!!!!!

  • yasNtas
    yasNtas
    6-10-2009 4:31 am

    Oh, and that’s the lighting that’s making me look lighter than what I am in that pic. Yes I am on the darker side and I’m in my 30’s and I experianced some light vs dark situations. So I speak of experience and observances

  • yasNtas
    yasNtas
    6-10-2009 4:22 am

    If your not a dark skin sister then you will never know how it feels to be pushed aside so that the lighter skin sister gets the spot light. I hate it when people say get over something and never been through that situation and not every one get over things as easy as another person. I’m not hating on light skin sistas but the one’s that think their better because they’re light, those are the one’s that get on my nerves. S**ttt, that’s pretty much any one, I don’t like conceited people.

  • Kelis_TheMagnificent
    Kelis_TheMagnificent
    6-10-2009 1:02 am

    The truth is dark skinned women are not featured in videos as much as lighter skinned women. You say you are “an equal opportunity employer.” If this is true you would recogize that this video, along with the majority of the other rap/r&b or Hip hop music videos, is yet another that adds to the discrimination of darker skinned women. Adversity and opposition to this video, and the others just like it, was inevitable. Rock/punk/country music videos dont feature dark skinned or black women as the main women in their videos most of the time, so why do Hip hop/R&B and Rap Video’s feature light skinned or white women as the main women in their videos most of the time? Simple answer: They know how ridiculous it is.

  • Miss_Pha29
    Miss_Pha29
    6-9-2009 8:49 pm

    Why are ppl still trippin over skin color and race wat will it solve to complain about it it’s not like he gon re-shoot the video wit a DARKER girl i’m gettin sick of this ppl move on get a life

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