How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex
Yesterday, Katherine Ozment published an article on Salon about her three year old daughter, Jessie, grabbing her six year old brother’s, William, member during bath time. Seeing her son not mind that his sister was doing this, she told him not to let his sister grab him or she might start grab all his friends’ members and she wouldn’t have friends as a result of it. After this explanation, the privates grabbing ceased for a while until her daughter said “I wish I had a penis” while cleaning up before bed.
Are you feeding your kids well?
At hearing this, Ozment had to swallow her own reservations from her upbringing in order to rectify her daughter obvious ‘penis envy’ by telling her :
I stiffened my spine, looked Jessie in the eye, and said, “You, Jessie Joan, have a vagina.”
Although Ozment was very sure that Jessie didn’t completely grasp what she said, the tot smiled at her mother with pride. She then walked over to William and teased him:
The next moment, Jessie walked over to William, put her hands on her hips and, swaying back and forth, sang to the tune of nana-nana-boo-boo: “I have a vagina! I have a vagina!”
Later in the night, William tried to trip Jessie up asking if she knew where her vagina is to which she replied while patting her privates, “Yes, I do. My bajina is right here.”
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I think Ozment’s story is a great lesson in how young children can start talking about sex, the difference between boys and girls, and needing to know how their bodies are wonderfully made. Many parents dodge the sex talk with their kids resulting in them seeking advice from friends who know just as much, or as little, as they do. She didn’t let her conservative upbringing hinder her teaching her daughter about her body and not making her feel ashamed of it.
What was your first sex talk like? Did you go to your parents, or your friends? Tell us your stories!
Source: Salon.com
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Comments 4
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dennyt919
I believe that talking to your children about sex is totally different from talking to them about their bodies. Sex is an act and in order to properly explain it, the act must be explained and described. There is no need for a 3 or 5 or 10 year old to be cheated out of their innocence so soon, by being forced to envision sexual intercourse. They can be taught about the reproductive system and about their individual bodies without implementing sexual context, at that stage in their lives. Even though young people are engaging in sexual intercourse earlier today, we still must preserve their childhood and allow them to develop in stages. It’s never too young to learn about your body parts and about inappropriate touching…but I don’t believe in putting the horse before the cart..
ittastesjustlikecake
I feel telling your children about sex is a process you can’t just wait until there teens to jump into. It all starts when your teaching them about the other body parts. As a single mother of girls I started telling my girls as early as 1, Although I wasn’t telling them about sex, I was telling them about good and bad touch. If they dont know what they have, how can they know what it’s funtion is. As your teaching them where not to let people touch, your creating a trust with them.Making them feel that they can always tell you if they have a problem or question concerning their privates. If you start early enough as they enter their teens if won’t be so embarassing to her mommy talk about sex, because you have been teaching them all along. I live in an area where you see a lot of young girls pregnant with no direction, I was one of them, but I decided to break the cycle with my girls because you always want better for your kids. My oldest is 14 and we talk all the time. I knew my teachings were successful when she broke up with her boyfriend because he didnt want to wait for sex. And she bluntly came out and told me. YOU HAVE TO CREATE TRUST IN ALL AREAS THE SOONER THE BETTER!!!!
cleveland_diva
Well personally I think its best to start telling our kids about there bodies early so that they know. Because my 5 yr old girl asks me questions and I answer them so she knows that as she gets older her body will change and she should always feel comfortable with talking to her mother about anything thats going on weather its sex,drugs,etc… Parents come on now our kids are growing up in a different era then we did so its time to keep it real with them so to speak. I don’t know about other parents out there but I would rather my child talk to me then pick up the gossip on the streets.
G-WIN
WELL THREE YR OLD IS TO YOUNG
TELL THEM ABOUT THEM BIRDS AND BEES
LATER ON UNTIL THEY GET 9 OR 10
IF NOT 8 YR OF AGE
THEY DONT KNOW WHATS GOING ON BY THAT AGE ANYWAY