Online PSA Renacts Rihanna Beating

That is not wat happen…People really need to get their stories straight before they try to re-enact something that was only told by media and not really by the two victims in the incident… and yes i said victims cuz Chris Brown was beaten upon to…

This is what happens in a society when there are not enough “good daddies”, that stick around and raise their kids, in that society. It does not necessarily matter whether or not YOU had a good daddy; it’s a numbers game. In a neighborhood of 100 married couples, if only one gets a divorce a month, they are beating the national average. So, what is the effect of 12 houses out of seven, with an average family size of five, IF the woman stays in the home? 48 people a year, in one neighborhood – and of that 36 children, on average. In as little as 13 years, a newborn will become a new teenager. And by the time that baby becomes a teenager, that neighborhood will be affected almost completely by divorce that came out of abuse, with as many as 456 people knowing personally, or being affected by the knowledge of their neighbors in that community being abused. The solution? Daddies that stay in the home, helping families get and stay whole. Out of those 500, it becomes important that the remaining 44 people, or 11 households (nine if you count them as five member households), get that last best shot at surviving among the fray. My opinion, but this has worked for me. I stayed with my ex-wife until all of my children were grown. They had, and still have a full relationship with both mother and “dad”. They understand and respect us both for sticking things out for them, and they are whole people, good men and women who contribute to their community. I say this, because I know that there are opposing viewpoints, but you can’t argue with success. For every child that has the benefit of their father in the home until they reach adulthood, it has made a huge difference in their lives. They understand more than a simple sense of community – they see themselves as having a say in the way it develops; having a responsibility, rights, and benefits that go along with it. They don’t shy away from local or global issues because their sense of purpose has been given attention and validation. Why? Father was there. I don’t mean to take away anything from single mothers – except this. Mothers, no matter how hard you try (and many of you are very successful at balancing yourself at playing both roles for your children), you must admit that it would have been a whole lot easier with a true helpmate. I’m not saying that your ex-husband was the greatest – just that your children, and the benefit he provides by something as simple as a man’s presence and connection with his children is a commodity that cannot be undervalued. To have someone to take over in your role, on the days when you have nothing else to give, the moments like those that occur too as your body goes through the hormonal changes of your own maturity. To have someone to hold you, even if there is nothing that either of you can do when a loved one dies; the weather (Katrina) gets rough; the finances get tight; even something as simple as the “b” at work who is minute from getting a butt-kicking from you – someone to side with you. All that is important, and even down to the simplest factor of just having someone to hold or to hold you..whenever, just “because”…makes a huge difference. Why? Because your children need to see you being valued. And even if the man devalues you, they need to know, and see, and understand for themselves what is or is not acceptable in a relationship. Life has not issued you a manual for how to raise kids…especially not your kids, based upon all of the things you value. BUT…what you do have is the husband, the father, the sperm donor, or some male representative at the onset. And he needs to be a part of the lives that you both have created. When this element is missing, so is harmony; so is balance; so is responsibility; so is the sense of community – (good or bad); and so is the measure of dignity and respect that your children need to begin operating with in their lives. They have to see it, feel it, witness it, evidence it in your lives as a family, so they can benefit – if only by the opportunity to have been “included” in one way or another throughout their lives. THAT is what is missing in this society. Put that element back, and ALL of these abuses of life will change for the better…even if it only happens for one family, you have just affected the lives of four other people, on average.

Jazz