5 Signs Of A Friendship Gone Bad
No one likes to think about friendships that come to an end, but sometimes this is the necessary course of action. Here are some tips on how to tell when your friendship is unhealthy … and how to disengage from shine.com:
1) Your friend is jealous of you. Jealousy is different than envy and the first can be very toxic for the relationship. Jealousy is: “I want what you have and I want you dead or disappeared.” Envy is just: “I want what you have.” A jealous friend will want to cut you out of her life because she really wants what you have and can’t stand to be around you anymore. An envious friend will want what you have, but will look to you as her inspiration or role model, and compete with you to get in the lead.
2) Your friend is a “doormat“: It’s tiring to always be with someone who is so malleable.
5 bad habits that ruin good relationships
3) Your friend wasn’t there for you. It’s sometimes hard to see if a friend is really a true pal until there is a life-changing moment in your life that requires the person’s support. This eye-opening event is called The Inciting Incident, which is when everything is going along fine, until wham! someone gets sick, or loses their job, or gets married or loses a loved one, and you find that the friend you thought would be by your side isn’t there for you at all. She doesn’t celebrate your good news nor does she help you in times of need. For some women it takes an “inciting incident” to finally notice that a friend is toxic.
4) Your friend is draining you: You feel you’re psychologically and emotionally giving all your energy to her and receiving nothing in return.
5) You don’t share the same values or the same world view: It’s a red flag that this isn’t the right friend for you if you don’t respect her for who she is. I interviewed a woman who wished her friend’s husband ill. It made the married woman realize that her friend’s behavior is nothing like her own.
Is it time to end the friendship?
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naughtia74
i just had to read this because my friend and i are no longer speaking at the moment and it really hurts we have been friends since middle school we do everything together as girlfriends do except sleep together lol but we meet guys she knows all my secrets i know hers she supports the fact that i’m bi and she compliments me alot as i do her she loves the fact that i’m a wild child i’ll say anything out my mouth and don’t give a damn and we are always sticking up for eachother even when it comes to family but we stop talking over an incident that took place which led me to believe that my friend was my frienemy i tried to reach her through text message and phone calls and she never got back to me i wanted to tell her that i knew what was going on and i thought we would talk about it and be friends by now but she has completely cut me off i love her as if she were my own flesh and blood we go through our ups and downs alot but at the end of it all we always come around but not this time she refuses to talk to me and i can’t believe she’s acting this way but life must go on we were so close i dnt know how us not speaking is affecting her but it’s really devastating to me i just pray oneday that my friend and i get it together because i’m really tired of falling in and out of friendships with her i’m always there when she needs me no matter what a friend until the end i wish she felt the same way.
mizzkahlia
*I have a few “friends” like that. I had to get rid of them because I was able to see that they didn’t acknowledge my success. I was always there for them, until one day I wised up, looked around and let them go. To hell with arguing, debating, getting upset. Its a waste of energy. I totally agree with the 4th rule. No one friendship should consist of energy loss, or physical exhaustion. Thats unecessary. Being jealous or envious of something is like almost being blindsighted. Your blessings will come when you pay attention to you!!!
nanapeppa
This is one of the more relevantly poignant articles submitted by Hello Beautiful. The information is insightfully revealing and when compared to my own personal experiences, I found all five points to be startingly true; especially number three which focuses on “life-changing” moments. It is during the toughest of times that we as people come to know our true family and friends.
There’s a purpose and meaning behind everything. The Universe must have meant for me to read this today. I now realize that what I thought was once a good friendship worthy of mending cannot and should not be salvaged.
Thanks Hello Beautful!
LaDawnThEGreaT1
that is i why i only have one good friend.. others have came and left. but she has been here 13 years strong and counting.. i have endured all the things posted in this article. and i had to grow up and leave them type of people alone.. honestly i can say u dont need many friends to feel humble or even “popular” just one good friend to hold u down thru good and bad, thru the dumb s**t we do, to the smart decisions we make, one who will never judge, but help u when things aren’t at peace, and who can help u make good decisions not talk about the bad ones u made… i can go on for hours about this.. but I LOVE MY BEST FRIEND.. IM GONNA CALL HER NOW..
gapeaches26
So true………
daisy1980
that’s life some friends come and go out of your life, then you have some that leave a spot in ur life and offcourse the friends that are always there evendo you havent seen each other for a month, a year, 3 years but you know it’s still all good
sha0359
I get rid of friends when they don’t mean good for me, I want the best for them and i always praise their achievements, and when they look good i tell them they do.But when it come’s to me they tend not to say any thing. i find that when i am feeling down their always around me or phoneing me with their problems, but as soon has i feel on top of the world their off. so to say “jealousy” is when people want to cut you out their life’s, i disagree it might be the other way round that’s in my case, that’s why i remove people from my life! whats not good for me is history.