Age Ain’t Nothin’ But A Number
When I first moved here from Ohio, I had to admit that I was nervous. I had unexpectedly lost my job, was stressed out ’cause the roomie was gettin’ on my nerves, and I was worried that my stay in Brooklyn was going to be a short one. Instead, that “short one” ended up being a 5′1″ too-cute-to-be-30-something-year-old that proved that it’s not where you’re from, but where you’re at!
My boy Andreas Hale, came by for a work-related trip and to get away from experiencing a bad Zohan episode, so we decided to hit up Studio B. I am not into the hipster thing so tough – I love it or hate it – but if Williamsburg is the place to be, no tight pants-wearing dude is gonna keep me from dancin’ with those tight-pants-wearin’ girlies. Anyhoo, at the end of the night, I managed to catch this girl’s eye and, with a flash of smile, we were politickin’ something official.
Baby girl was nice – just the right size for my taller-than-Ja-Rule self – and she could talk… intelligently, at that! After Dre broke out, homegirl and I took our act on the road. Straight to – you guessed it – McDonald’s – where we talked about everything from Obama’s rise in American politics to why MTV is doing a Real World in Brooklyn! She asks me, “Why are you single?” “Because I’m not looking for love,” I answered. She smiled. I did too… and like that, it was Lady and the Tramp all over again… but with french fries.
She was all that and a McFlurry, but there was one catch: she had a man. Even though he was an out-of-town boyfriend (St. Louis; far enough away for me to still holler), yours truly wasn’t down to be her late-night Casanova, and ended the night with hopes of hanging out again.
…The next day…
We planned to catch a movie and head to Union Square after meeting up at her place. Once that door opened, it gave way to a familiar face with a noticeably different look. I ask, “You alright?” She licks her lips in response, and all I can remember from that night was H-Town in the background, a few Hallelujahs and three broken plates…
Her tone was Pam Grier smoothness; she knew what she wanted, and I guess a part of me did, too…but I wasn’t looking for love. We got fresh, ready to step out, but there was a knock at the door. Shawty opens it up and – surprise! it was her boyfriend from St. Louis in town on a surprise red-eye visit.
As for me, I’m Joe Cool, but nervous because a situation like this could turn into an R. Kelly soap opera in a hot second. But homegirl was smooth – even for my taste. She introduced me, we shook hands and then she full-blown kissed him… in the mouth! Yes! In the mouth! I kinda felt sick to my stomach and wondered if this was how Hillary felt after finding out about Monica. Homegirl decided that spending quality time with her life-mate was more important than our date, and I hightailed it out of there like my name was the Roadrunner. I had only been gone for only about an hour when I got a text from the 30-year-old saying, “Will you come back for more?”
I just looked at the text and laughed. The bottom line is, if you’re ever in a relationship and want to make sure that one’s significant other is faithful, remember these words: “It ain’t where you’re from, it’s where you’re at…”
How important is location in love? If you thought that was funny, be sure to check out why yours truly and Eddie Murphy have something in comment! Speak on it in the comments!
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Comments 42
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Onlyrookie
12-24-2008 9:02 pm
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Mochaschoice
12-23-2008 9:07 pm
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nanapeppa
12-23-2008 7:31 pm
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boricuatiger
12-23-2008 6:52 pm
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Superwo_man
12-23-2008 2:12 pm
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ClarkKentBKNY
12-23-2008 2:11 pm
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joyonearth
12-23-2008 9:58 am
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monai1040
12-23-2008 12:19 am
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Elequent1
12-23-2008 12:05 am
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nanapeppa
12-22-2008 9:18 pm
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Gator_Girl
12-22-2008 6:11 pm
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luv_blkmen
12-22-2008 5:42 pm
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DIAMOND19892
12-22-2008 4:55 pm
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broke_as_ajoke
12-22-2008 4:22 pm
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agoodmann
12-22-2008 4:15 pm
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Sliww1
12-22-2008 3:58 pm
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klbentley
12-22-2008 2:33 pm
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Mochalicious68
12-22-2008 2:24 pm
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Last_Revelation
12-22-2008 2:20 pm
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ImminentThreat
12-22-2008 2:17 pm
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Andre396
12-22-2008 1:53 pm
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NahJustChillin
12-22-2008 1:01 pm
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DA_GEORGETOWN_MAYOR
12-22-2008 12:46 pm
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prgrssnwrk
12-22-2008 12:14 pm
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JAERICH05
12-22-2008 11:33 am
1 2 Next »Onlyrookie
Damn, if that was a true confession; something that really happen to you…..all I can say is Damn!!! It is hard dating, checking out someone, looking for or being steady in a relationship……the fact that this may just be a story, but still have people like me wondering if it really happen says it all. I tried the long distance thing, funny enough it fell apart when my other half starting living in the same city with me……..DRAMA unfolded…every heard the story about when the phone righs..lomg story…….Did I my mention my other half was a husband not just someone I was kicking with? What can I say life is life……we can only laugh and live….thanks for the laugh. As for me I am living DRAMA FREE.
Mochaschoice
Laughing..what a hot mess! Well, she did say she had a man….lol That was funny. Thanks for sharing!
nanapeppa
@ClarkKentBKNY-
i’m diggin’ the natural, honest feel of your writing. having read the comments, so does everyone else. you’re sharing soul aspects of human nature and a few intricacies of your own subconscious in the process. the social dynamics of dating and male/female relationship comlexities are always and forever topics of great interest. how about keeping us updated in your escapades and rendezvous?
boricuatiger
Wow!!! I hope that the next time you decided to try to holla at someone who has a man you think twice…As for the chick I can’t even hate on what she did. People do what ever they want when it comes to relationships nothing is monogamous anymore. Men and women are alike in so many ways only thing is neither one wants to admit it and call each other names. Its sad.
Superwo_man
Thanks for the few giggles and one; ok three out burst, while sitting at my desk. That was funny and cute at the same time and a little bit of life; ok your life…..Life izzz a black sheet of paper; what you write on it is what it will be. Oh be safe…
ClarkKentBKNY
@Nanapeppa -
No. The girl and I had already stopped talking months before I even wrote this piece. So, it was just me putting out there a situation where I thought it was just funny how those stereotypes – however blurred they may be – still affect those who aren’t a part of the games that the other one tries to get away with.
joyonearth
Monogmous relationships seem to be fading away, like chivalry. Trust and respect is apart of love and in this scenerio there is lack of. What pleases one may not please another. As long as its all put on the table in the beginning so there is no confusion.
monai1040
Sounds like the hunter got captured by the game!
Elequent1
I find it ironic that in some of these posts the men will call the woman a name, yet they are just as willing to go with the flow when it comes to a peice of azz. Yes the chick was bogus, but im sure she learned it from a man, just like the ones talkin bout how they would hit it. In all fairness, both sexes are messed up. As long as you are careful you are allowed to make any sexual choices that float your boat. For the record, he may not have been faithful either but they still loved each other. People do what works for them. What bothers me is that when men cheat, that old stereotype is still present today, it’s like they are brushin their teeth, but when woman do it, we are made to sound sleezy and are called this or that. I salute the playa if she wanna put herself out there like dat.
nanapeppa
hmmm… the woman you write of continues to float within the deep recesses of that mind yours, doesn’t she? what was it she said to you between hallejujahs and that third broken plate?
Gator_Girl
I agree with you on that, but true love would have never went to McDonald’s or to the club for that matter….. Possibility left that door WIDE open. Love is possible and you don’t have to look for it, it will find you.
luv_blkmen
You’ve heard it before I’m sure. Location, Location, Location. Me personally I’m not into the long distance relationship. I want my man near me where I can touch, kiss, feel and watch his ass LOL.
DIAMOND19892
AWW…ITS OK SWEETIE LAST VALENTINE I WAS DATING A GUY AND HE CAME OVER I HAD A DINNER READY ALL THE GOOD STUFF ND HE TOLD ME HE WAS GAY..BUT WAIT IT GETS BETTER HIS BOYFRIEND CAME WITH HIM…BUT YOU WILL FIND LOVE SOMEDAY
broke_as_ajoke
bro it aint your girl.. but i’m sure a brother doesn’t want to be with a girl like that, but the truth question would be how would a brother find out if ya girl is no good.. like the one u wrote about.. if I’m not looking for love and the chic is a bleep bleep, why not go back.. u can tell from the jump she aint bout a dime if she cheating on the man she is supposed to be with.
agoodmann
Sounds like you might have anough stories to write a book. It could become a best seller with stories like these
Sliww1
LOL…..sorry! I kinda cracked a laugh when i was finished reading the story. But, things like that happen!! Sometimes we take a chance on things, not really expecting on knowwing at the end how it is gonna turn out! At least she did tell you!! How awkward it would have been had you not known and the boyfriend showed up!! I don’t even want to think about it!!
klbentley
That is hilarious, she has skills… Like McDonalds “I’m lovin it”
Mochalicious68
If your love is strong it doesn’t matter where your at, because you know who you with.
Last_Revelation
roll with the punches… you can always tell if a girl is cheating… or maybe that’s just me… i have too many female friends that let me know when scandalous activity will be going down…
i really don’t see the problem with this situation, he “isn’t lookin’ for love” and she clearly isn’t lookin for it cause she got it… why not come back for more… if you got hellelujahs and broken plates from it… best believe i’m comin back for seconds, thirds, and so on, until i’m just too tired of the food…
ImminentThreat
lmao…funny! Thanks for sharing that !
Andre396
yo son im from cleveland oh and i don’t like these broads at all here but for you to be in NY yo and from OH and have to deal wit individuals like that is really bad but i guess you got people like that everywhere i would’ve been heated if that broad yo did that to me for real.
NahJustChillin
That’s crazy. Luckily, it didn’t turn into something more than a quick “Alright, I’m out” type of situation because I know at least 2 men who would have seen that situation, and would have gone off straight wreckless in there! But you live and you learn, took the “L” and are here to talk about it today
DA_GEORGETOWN_MAYOR
INDIANS DONT THINK AGE MATTERS!
prgrssnwrk
I never got why people thought the long distance thing was even an option. 80% of the things that keep a relationships wheels rolling, are done face to face. I would alwys just smile while laughing inside at my girls who thought their guy was 1,ooo+ miles away, unmarried, yet faithful. Never got it…
JAERICH05
it happens homie, it happens!