10 Places To Have Sex Before You Die

There’s a whole world of cheap thrills and tawdry sex out there. Ditch the safety of under the duvet and work your way through these essential places to conquer before you die….

1. Get Autoerotic

The bigger the vehicle the more scope there is for sexual adventure, but if you don’t drive a Bentley have no fear. You’d be surprised at how well you can get down to it in the most cramped of spaces. So, set the sat nav for the local lovers lane or secluded parking lot and start steaming up those windows.

2. Do Some Lengths in the Pool

The water rushes around your genitals, making both of you feel different and more exciting. The buoyancy allows great thrusting with minimum effort and orgasm is reached with ease as the water relaxes and soothes. You can take it slow or re-enact your favorite scene in Showgirls. Beware as water may kill the natural lube and make entry a little difficult, but ultimately worth the effort. Aim for a hotel pool after dark rather than the local Rec centre unless you want a criminal record for your efforts.

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3. The Cinema

It’s what art films were made for, so go really late to a sexy film and chose a secluded spot. Knowing that no one can see you back there invites naughtiness. Thing is, can you cope with the shame of being caught in the beam of a torch wielded by an awkward, acne-ridden teenager suffering from a bad case of girlfriend envy?

4. Back of a Cab

Why wait ’til you get home? You managed to haul your drunken asses into a cab, slip the driver a crisp note and tell him to take the scenic route as you make full use of the spacious back seat. So long as you can handle the cabbie getting his kicks as you get yours, fun for all parties ensues.

5. On a Train

Watch Risky Business for some foreplayesque inspiration then book two tickets on the A Train to O. Find a secluded train, wait for the carriage to empty then get frisky to the gentle swaying motion. Booking a night in a sleeper car is the less risky option for fulfilling this particular fantasy, but in essence, you’re still doing it aboard so right on!

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