Are Separate Beds Good For A Relationship?
[From The Frisky]
Here in the states, couples rarely admit to sleeping in separate beds, but across the pond not only do one in five couples avoid sharing a bed, they claim it improves their sex lives, too. An article in the Daily Mail tells the story of engaged couple Laura Mason and Colin Byers, both of whom are 28 and have slept in separate beds four of the last five years they’ve lived together. Citing sleep incompatibility as the reason for their separate beds – his snoring and warm body temperature keep her awake at night – they say their relationship and sex life improved when they stopped sleeping together: “We are just as close as ever. In fact, as soon as we made the decision, our sex life improved. We’d had a great sex life in our first year together, but having no sleep was making us too tired and irritable to crave that intimacy.”
They realize their arrangement is unique and may cause others to raise their eyebrows. “It seems to be the antithesis of romance,” Laura admits, “and other people’s attitudes make us occasionally question our judgment-if we love each other, surely we should be able to sleep in each other’s arms.” But they insist that they’re every bit as romantic and affectionate as couples who share a bed. They hold hands, cuddle on the couch, and start the night in the same bed before they separate for a good night’s sleep. Before they made the decision to sleep separately, they say they were always tired, and snappy with each other as a result. “I am looking forward to a long, happy marriage to Laura,” Colin says. “We’ve just had to accept that we are not sleep compatible and make a rational decision about it. I really don’t care what other people think-this works for us.”
This seems fine and good for Laura and Colin, and they seem sincere in their need for adequate sleep, but when are separate beds the sign of a relationship that’s in trouble?
To find out, read the rest of this article at TheFrisky.com.
These two aren’t afraid of sleeping in the same bed!
MEN OF THE YEAR
HOT CELEB PICS!
Comments 9
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MeeYow
At onyx11_76 – To clarify, I was not saying that a couple should sleep in the same bed so that you can keep a closer eye on each other. To me, sleeping together builds intimacy within the relationship that transcends just sex. There’s a closeness that develops lying in the arms of someone that you love and that you know loves you. If you just stop sleeping together after awhile, without making a formal decision to do so, then you should ask yourself “What direction is my relationship moving in?”
randolph44137
My always has to slide up under me and I end up sleeping on the edge of the bed. I brought up seperate beds, but she is not going for it.
FIEND_4_SUCCESS
sleeping in separate beds,can be smooth and lovely, although we’re in separate beds – I know she’d be thinking of me.we sill can hang out tight,and I can lay up all night – and to her, poems I could write -and not having to turn off the light. It’s kind of romantic,…sleeping in separate beds,..- smiling and grinning,…. – from something earlier that was said. You can grab your pen and paper, jot down plans for the eve – put a little note on her bed, – so when she wake-up,… she could read. Not only that,.here’s your chance to get in to it,…I mean in-ti-mate,…sleeping alone can be an instrument,….you can awake and cook breakfast while she sleep,….now you have more spice in your relationship – plus it’s time to eat. Wake up your special lady with breakfast in bed, as she’s driving to work – she’d be thinking of the good things you’d said. we as men,…it’s time for us to face the fact,-…we need more than a woman,..we need a woman that will have our back.these three things, – will make a relationship complete,..that’s being faithful, spending quality time,..and a good night sleep.sometime, a woman like to go to bed – and sleep with nothing but her birthday suit on, and compliments,..then left alone. Remember,..the best love-making that you can ever have, is the love-making that you don’t ever have to ask for. you must think like this,..If we worked and baby-sit our children all day, every moment of silence and good rest – is what we would forever be thankful for. that’s how our women are,..especially the one’s that are single moms. These are the one’s that have to deal with their child or children, plus,..our childish and adolescent behavior. admit it,..when we only consider our way,..that’s childish and adolescent. when was the last time you spent all day – making the whole day be all about your woman, and her alone. men,..when you sleep alone, you’ll come up with many ways to be a perfect man in your woman’s life.That is,..If you really love her and appreciate her. only If you knew that “He that findeth a wife, findeth a good thing.and a wife is more than just a woman,.she’s a virtuous woman that comes only from GOD. Just like God had to put man in a deep sleep to create the woman, by taking her from the rib of man – in which was the closet thing to a man’s heart – that protects his heart, a woman truly need her deep sleep so she can better prepare herself for the on-coming day as well as protect your heart to her very best ability.There’s many reasons why sleeping alone in separate beds truly is healthy for relationships. think about this,..when you’re sleep,..you’re at your best behavior. you need no-one there during this time.For what,..to wake you up complaining about how you snore….
FIEND_4_SUCCESS
I love sleeping by myself – with my life size teddy bears. I’m not married but when I was married, I slept in a seperate bed,same bedroom but seperate queen size bed. it does increase your sex life.Most deffitnely.It gives you an opportunity to appreciate what you have,as well as an opportunity to lay there across the house and evaluate her essence as well as miss her. also,..sneaking up on your woman warm body and easing her panties off is pretty fun a times.when your woman sleeps by herself,that gives her the perfect rest and opportunity to fully marinate.every man loves to eat a good dish that have marinated over night…uuuummmmm…”juicy…”’
creamidelite
Sleeping in separate beds does work. My man snores like a bull and I would end up waking him up because I couldn’t sleep. But after realizing that ok there still is intimacy we don’t have to sleep in the same bed it worked out great. Especially because he is an octopus in bed, i felt like i was trapped. Now we have our intimate times, have banging sex, taking a shower together, and head off to bed. It is great I enjoy my space and love my sleep. and the stress level in our relationship has decreased. So it does work. DO what works in your relationship.
LyRicAlLyiNcLiNeD
Man I run Hot, so if the chicc im wit runs hot too we gon need seperate beds i hate heat in my sleep
i hate when people talk about history as though they were there living it…
onyx11_76
Gren thats straight up bulls**t. What does sleeping together have to do with any thing. Many years ago right here in America married couples did not sleep together. That’s some modernized s**t that came with time and something you probably saw your parents do. Society says that married couples should sleep in the same bed and people always do what society says do and many Americans have fell into that trap. To each its own. And Mee Yow he was going to cheat regardless if you slept in the bed with him or not. If you are saying that one should sleep in the bed with their man cause they will know that he is cheating faster, then thats not a good reason if thats the only reason.
gren1shaw2
I believe that if your going to live as though you’re single you should be single.
MeeYow
Me and boyfriend of 7 years slept in separate bedrooms, and it was great!
…till I found out he was cheating and had to kick him out.
I DO NOT recommend sleeping in separate quarters unless you’re taking a break for angry sex later on.
So he snores? GET OVER IT (…or trade him in for a quieter model ;o)