After being bombarded with Facebook statuses that gave a shout out to all the single moms on a day that’s reserved for dads, I got fed up. Every single one of my friends who mentioned Father’s Day gave a huge middle finger to the dads who weren’t man enough to stick around.

Where ARE the dads? Seriously.

I know too many single moms. I only know two dads (one still has a baby on the way). Why is that?

For the women: I know sometimes things happen that are out of your control and some women get dropped without any inkling something was wrong. Other women simply sleep with the wrong men. They knew he wasn’t the right one, wouldn’t do right, couldn’t do right, but they slept with him anyway and nine months later, he’s a distant memory.

Read the rest of the article at blackandmarriedwithkids.com.

I Love My Black Woman’s Attitude!

Worrying About the Marriage Crisis Won’t Help Black Women!

]]> http://hellobeautiful.com/338447/what-happened-to-the-good-mate/feed/ 13 What Happened to The "Good Mate"? (thumbnail) ionehellobeautiful Black Wedding Cake Topper http://hellobeautiful.com/114031/how-do-you-tell-your-mate-to-lose-weight/ http://hellobeautiful.com/114031/how-do-you-tell-your-mate-to-lose-weight/#comments Tue, 24 Feb 2009 17:42:05 +0000 HelloBeautifulStaff http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=114031 ]]> Weight gain can be a serious issue in some relationships. We’ve all seen court show after court show where the root of the problem is someone gained weight now the other person isn’t interested anymore. I have friends who say you should always love someone no matter how their outside appearance changes. I have other friends who say they keep it tight because if they did not their man would look elsewhere and they wouldn’t blame him.

Recently a reader asked us how she could get her husband to work out more with her. He used to be fit but after an injury lost his mojo and started gaining weight. Fast forward several years and she admits that sometimes his body turns her off from wanting to be intimate.

The best advice we can give is to lead by example. You can work out and ask that person to work out with you. If they won’t go to the gym ask them to take a long romantic walk. Change your eating habits and ask them to join you. Try to make it into a team effort and you both may benefit from the results. Encourage your mate when you see progress and perhaps add a few incentives that we’ll leave up to your imagination. Last thing, don’t forget that men and women communicate differently. Telling your wife,”you need to drop 15 so you can get your sexy back” probably won’t have the same affect that it would if she told you that.

Read more about love, relationships, and family at BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com.

[From The Frisky]

Though the stigma is lessening, men are still far more likely than women to let their depression go untreated. Blame it on Rambo, Brando, or the lure of the martini, but many guys still aren’t getting the help they need. As the traditionally stressful, dark days of winter set in, here are some signs that the guy you love might be suffering from more than a loss in fantasy football …

1. Substance Use: Has he been drinking more beer than a pledging freshman? Has his usual dinner cocktail spawned into three? Often, an increase in substance use-and this includes cigarettes, recreational drugs, and caffeine-can be a desperate attempt to self-medicate or cover up unpleasant feelings that are gnawing at him.

2. Unhealthy Eating: We all have our baked chicken days and our nachos-by-the-truckload days; such is the fluctuation of normal eating. But if you see an increasing pattern of junk food bingeing, overeating, skipping meals or loss of appetite, these disruptions-and the weight changes that go with them— can be telltale signs of stress and depression.

3. Sleeping Changes: While some depressed people want nothing more than to snooze the day away, others lie awake at all hours. A change in sleeping habits, in either direction, can sometimes be a warning that a storm is brewing.

4. Irritability: Perhaps he’s taking that cocky waiter a little too personally, or he’s road-raging like a raging bull. Though many people associate anger and irritability with anything but depression, there is real evidence that edginess and grouchiness-especially among men-can signal sadness beneath.

What are the other four tell-tale signs of a depressed mate? Click here to find out.