Hello Beautiful » independent women

Can The Size Of A Woman’s Paycheck Mean Less Domestic Duties?

Telisha — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 13:30:17 +0000

For a better half of my day I sat at my desk refreshing my page to the HelloBeautiful homepage until it was confirmed that the Pinkett-Smith empire remained intact, no shame in my game! Lately money, love, and power are themes that have been on my mind. I suppose it’s because I am in my 20s most of my people are either in school or knee deep in a career rummaging through in pursuit of a better life, a life that to me the Pinkett-Smith clan have managed to maintain.

Will & Jada: “Our Marriage Is In Intact”

From power couples to an often frustrated independent woman, more females are comfortable adopting superwoman status. As amazing as a substantial bank account, ambition, and accomplishment is, the reality is the day becomes shorter with a lot on the go. Many of our grandmothers or even great grandmothers lived a perfectly fulfilled life maintaining a household cleaning, cooking, and raising children. Many of us have the same responsibilities but we’ve had to adjust somewhat fitting in career, additional education and various other ventures.

In speaking with a group of our better halves, I’ve found that men are not at all fazed by the prospect of a superwoman solider helping to steering the ship. A large handful of men were raised by progressive women and understand that his lover is going to wear many hats and even top them in paycheck zeros. With fewer hours in the day and a family to care for, is a woman who is bringing home the bacon ever dismissed from her traditional domestic duties?

There are evenings I come home and like a man I want my dinner on the table and my bath water running….of course I snap back to reality quick when I realize that a) I live on my own b) even when I was living with a man he was coming home from work around the same time as I was….so daily I reluctantly drag myself up and go into domestic mode, please tell me you can relate?!

The answer is simple for a Hollywood or executive couple; a busy schedule means it’s time to hire help, but what about you and me? You work, maintain your sexy, maintain your man, maintain a household and maybe maintain a family….does a larger paycheck or a busier schedule mean domestic duties take a back seat? Men, what domestic duties do you expect your partner to fulfill? Is today’s woman expected to do too much in the home or is she not doing enough?

HB family let’s discuss this…

Can The Independent Woman And The Gentleman Coexist?

Shanece Taylor — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 17:15:23 +0000

Can the independent woman and the gentleman coexist? This is one of the questions that constantly surfaces within a relationship. There is this tension for assertive women who want their men to know and understand they can take care of themselves, but at the same time, the women want to be the object of chivalrous devotion. Women need to clarify the roles in the relationship. Do they want to be the man or do they want the man to be the man? Even popular musicians are unable to escape the conflict. Destiny’s Child released “Independent Women” in 2001 and “Cater 2 U” in 2004.

Well, ladies, there is a way for the independent woman and the gentleman to coexist. It is all about maintaining an equal ground. You will need to compromise. Sounds simple enough, however, the key is to compromise on the “right” things. Keep your self-reliance while still encouraging your man to be chivalrous. One thing to remember is that letting a man take care of you will not relinquish your power over your life.

Below are some tips to help you create a harmonious environment for a new coexistence between the independent woman and the gentleman.

Tips for Coexistence:

AVOID telling your man, “I don’t need a man.” Then, what is his purpose in the relationship?
Let the man be the man. Let him take the lead. Let him make the first move.
You do not necessarily need to be LIKE a man to be independent.
Dress like a lady. Act like a lady. Be courteous and pleasant.
Continue to love yourself, and be confident.
Appreciate your man when he is a gentleman and recognize it as being decent and honest. Do not accuse him of having a hidden agenda.
Complement your man. He wants to hear good things about himself too.
Keep your opinions, but do not be forceful with them.
You do not need to be right all the time.
Do not compete with him. Do not try to be better than him. If you are better than him, try not to brag about it and throw it back in his face.
Independence is about being flexible and adapting to changing situations.

And, if your man needs a reminder on how to act like a gentleman, let him read over the basic tips below.

Gentlemen Tips:

Do not lose your temper
Remove your hat indoors
Always open doors for women
Help a woman put on her coat
Pull out a woman’s chair for her when she sits down
Stand when a woman enters or exits the room
Offer her your arm when escorting a woman
Ask her if she needs anything
If it is cold outside, offer her your jacket
Do not use profane language in front of women
Always look into a woman’s eyes, and never at her body

Take a look at our independent and gentlemen gallery:

Are Independent Ladies Too Much To Handle? What’s Your Opinion

Byakuugan_Mod — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 22:24:34 +0000

BP member lovinmusic poses the question “Have I become too independent that most men are afraid of a woman like me?” in the forum titled Have we as women become so independant or are we too much woman for him?

The debate rages on check it out here. What is your opinion?

UPDATE 4/4/09 I would like to thank all those who commented and will comment on this article.

I think having respectful conversations on topics like this can go a long way toward improving relationships within our communities. Many of the problems we face come from unexpressed expectations and being unsure of our roles as individuals within our relationships. Open dialogue is an important step into clearing up those misunderstandings. In case you missed it check out another BP community topic on “Family Secrets” and let us at Hello Beautiful know what you think.

Once again thank you, B-Mod.