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From Essence.com

1. FLIRT WITH MEN YOU’RE NOT INTERESTED IN.
Touch a postman’s shoulder when you thank him for directions, tell the bartender this is the best drink you’ve had in years, or mention to the 411 operator that you think he has a great voice. Practice makes perfect, and you’ll want to be adept at flirting when a handsome catch walks into your life.

2. GET FIVE FRIENDS TO HOOK A SISTER UP.
“Put out a dating SOS to your girls, telling them you’d like to be set up,” says Julie Taylor, coauthor of How to Be a Dominant Diva (Avalon Press). Since the root of each setup will be a trusted friend, chances are you’ll at least have a good time-or even five fun outings.

3. DO THE WORK FOR HIM.
Already got a date? Do the planning and take the pressure off him. (Design your perfect evening in the process.) He will be so happy he didn’t have to think about this that he’ll have a great time before the date even starts.

4. STOP APPEARING UNAVAILABLE.
“Unconsciously we’re driving men away because we’re in ‘get-it-done’ mode,” says D.C. radio personality Vikki Johnson, author of Addicted to Counterfeit Love (Kimani Press). Our to-do lists are miles long and our obligations are ocean-deep. But if you’re constantly busy, men will think you don’t have any time for them. One solution: Take a real hard look at yourself and figure out how you can create more free time to meet a partner.

5. SEEK SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE.
The pastor of your church or the head of your place of worship is an unusual but excellent dating resource. “He knows everyone in the church, including who’s single and looking,” says Tosin Ola, aka Vixen, the woman behind The Bad Girls Guide blog (vixentales.blogspot.com). Try talking to him about possible prospects.

What advice do YOU have to offer?  Let us know in comments!

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  • http://www.blackplanet.com/BROWNIE140/ BROWNIE140

    IT’S HARD TO FIND LOVE. USUALLY THE MEN IM INTERESTED IN AREN’T INTERESTED IN DATING ME. I DON’T FLIRT ALOT, BUT I DO SMILE AND SAY HELLO. I DONT LIKE TO BE SET UP ON DATES. HOPEFULLY SOON ILL FIND SOMEONE JUST FOR ME. I DO AGREE, I GOTTA DO MORE.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/shindogg/ shindogg

    sure, give tips to how women can find men but not how men can find women. men rarely push women away, whereas women do it alot.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/VaselGlass001/ VaselGlass001

    i might be hated for sayin this; however, the best way for a woman to find ANY man is to first get rid of theories of a perfect man for one, and two, you might not like the sound of this, but you have to look a little vulnerable.
    I am not saying that you are a helpless woman who can not do for herself. Think of it like this:

    You have a screaming about how thirsty he is, and no matter how loud he screams no body gives him anything to drink. The reason why, is because he is holding a canteen with drinkable water inside. Now suppose he had the canteen, and no water inside someone might have lent a hand.

    Its nothing wrong with having your own, but if you look to have everything, then it can make a GOOD(even bad) men say whats the point.

    everyone want to feel Important and like they are needed.

    Ask yourself this question, if you actually have a man and you walk into a room ready to give him a good night, you him a romantic dinner; but he cooks for himself, you went and put on his favorite CD; he turns on the radio, you try to show him affection, he seems stale, why? because he is self sufficient, he doesn’t seem to need you or anyone else to satisfy him. Then it boils down to why is he evening a relationship if he feels like that? Same thing to the OVERLY independent woman, most times it leaves a man saying, “whats the point she got it.”

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/MZ-TIARRA/ MZ-TIARRA

    I AGREE WITH YOUR COMMENT
    -BROWNIE140-
    “IT’S HARD TO FIND LOVE. USUALLY THE MEN IM INTERESTED IN AREN’T INTERESTED IN DATING ME. I DON’T FLIRT ALOT, BUT I DO SMILE AND SAY HELLO. I DONT LIKE TO BE SET UP ON DATES. HOPEFULLY SOON ILL FIND SOMEONE JUST FOR ME. I DO AGREE, I GOTTA DO MORE.” AND I NEED TO WORK ON #4 STOP APPEARING UNAVAILABLE.

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