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Kim K with suitcases

When a woman invests serious time into her appearance, she is often labeled “high maintenance.” But what does this term mean, exactly? In any other context the phrase would simply be an indication of the amount of effort necessary to maintain something. Often, it is beautiful, precious or meaningful things that require heavy maintenance. The Mona Lisa; high maintenance. The Museum of Natural History; high maintenance. Mercedes Benz; high maintenance. All the aforementioned are beautiful, desirable things that naturally require time, attention and effort in terms of their upkeep. When this term is used to describe a woman’s beauty or self-care regimen, however, it takes on a new meaning. There is a negative connotation associated with the expression “high maintenance,” where women are concerned.  Why are women who pay particular attention to the maintenance of their image marginalized by this term?

Some will argue that investing valuable time into one’s image is purely superficial.  But in a society where so much emphasis is placed on beauty, can we blame women for succumbing to the pressures placed on them to achieve impossible standards of beauty? Furthermore, why should we blame any woman who feels the need to maintain a certain image? When did it become a sin to look good?

To some people the term high maintenance extends to cover women who  demand certain standards of living as well. Again these women are regarded negatively. But should we condemn women who seek partners able to maintain their lifestyle? Sure, it is wrong to choose a man solely based on what he can do for you. But shouldn’t that factor be considered in the grand scheme of things? While it’s a blessing to find a man who is a great person, is it also wrong to want a great man who is also financially equipped to maintain a certain lifestyle? And can we separate materialism from the “high maintenance” concept, or are they indefinitely joined in a union of negativity?

Of course, as with everything else, there is a wide spectrum of high maintenance with extreme ends. Feel free to deplore the image obsessed, gold-diggers of the world. But what about the sistas who are just trying to look and live good, while putting effort into maintaining themselves. Why should that be a bad thing?

The line between high maintenance women and gold-diggers can be thin. Here are some women who might have crossed over:

5 Types Of Men To Avoid

10 Signs You’re A Gold Digger?

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  • http://www.blackplanet.com/kennyd4/ kennyd4

    how can you be a gold digger if ur married to this fool?he sighed on to take care of her azz and knew from jump street what it took to keep her duffus azz happy,now for the skank azz clown broad who thinks she supposed to get whatever she can cause se thinks her coochie is lined with gold has another thing coming(hopefully in her mouth).to save money just buy a real hoe and move on.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/BRITTANY_SO_CHl/ BRITTANY_SO_CHl

    I don’t think being high maintenance is a bad thing as it perstains to upkeep. I don’t understand how high maintenance equates gold digger though.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/2good2bsingle/ 2good2bsingle

    @ KennyD4.. I like that!! lol Tell it like it T-I-Z, my Man! Only thing is.. A married ‘Gold Digger’ IS still a ‘Gold-Digger’! She was just lucky enough to meet a RICH DAMNED FOOL!! ;-) @ Brittany_So_Chi.. WTF??!! OF COURSE ‘Gold-Digger’ pertains to up-keep!! Also.. If YOU DON’T see where being ‘High-Maintenance’ equates to ‘Gold-Digger’, then either you’re part of the problem (a Gold-Digger’ yourself), or ONE DUMB-@$$ ‘Woman’!! [>;-O

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Shamel_/ Shamel_

    High Maintenance & “Gold-digger” are in fact two separate entities. HOWEVER, often times most women who are considered to be high maintenance are gold diggers. Nonetheless, you CAN be high maintenance and NOT be a gold digger. Prime example, I like to rock Coach purses, a fan of Gucci & Tiffany’s and I am one to pamper myself at the nail salon gettin’ pedi’s and mani’s, take trips abroad and dine out at nice restaurants but I WORK HARD for it!!! I am not some lazy skeez who sits on her ass waitin’ for the next man to take care of me. I put myself through college acquired a degree, established a descent paying job (although I could stand to make more money) and I feel like I work to afford me nice things. I am Educated, self-sufficient and independent. I would desire a man to “compliment” my lifestyle. Why would you downgrade?!? I would hope a well established man would want an “equal” in his counterpart as well and I don’t knock that. I have no respect for women who are Gold diggers but if these men decide to take care of these women that’s on them. You can’t be mad at these women. However, I knock no one for being High maintanence…do you!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/SenorCafeDa2nd/ SenorCafeDa2nd

    I am co-signing with kennyd4′s response.

    Puzzy is too plentiful to be trickin big dollars for it.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/DAREALRECKLESS/ DAREALRECKLESS

    eye’m CO-co-signing SENORCAFE

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/kbneville/ kbneville

    It’s alright to pay attention to your looks, but myself personally, I wouldn’t go out and spend $500 on a pair of jeans then wear them once. Or spend $150 on my hair when I KNOW that it’s gonna fall before I even make it back to the house.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Da_J_Rok/ Da_J_Rok

    lol @ another classic quote my nigga kennyd

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Da_J_Rok/ Da_J_Rok

    One more thing… It aint trickin if u got it

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/DAREALRECKLESS/ DAREALRECKLESS

    respect to Da_J_Rok but it’s STILL tricking. why pay for something that’s free?!

    co-sign Kbneville

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/DaCute1nSC/ DaCute1nSC

    To Shamel_: I do agree with you, I believe you should get a man that do fit your lifestyle. I would want somebody that is just as independent as I am and has to offer the same much as I do. But only for a different reason….. If I’m dating a woman on my level, I look for her to take care of her own expenses just becuz she’s on that level. However, I don’t expect to gain much… but I know one damn thing… I won’t be losing much in my wallet.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/theurbanprincess/ theurbanprincess

    @Shamel_ I totally agree with you!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/0VancouverHurts/ 0VancouverHurts

    Well put Shamel, I agree! and lol @ kbneville for ur hair falling out!

    Damn @ DaCute1nSC No woman wants a man who can’t pamper her, good luck finding your woman!

    I give props to the gold-diggers, men will cheat but money wont! (im playin) Get money!!!!!!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/CARA-MELLO/ CARA-MELLO

    I’m sure alot of women are independant when they are single, then they get someone and act like they can’t pay for shyt anymore.

    @0vancouver, whats your price? lol

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/shyscorpio1/ shyscorpio1

    high maintenence in the regular folks homes means that a woman think that she is soooo damn fine that her nose is permanently stuck up her ass and she is rude and trifling thinking that only the finest and most expensive things or people better cross her path!
    in other words HIGH MAINTENANCE = GOLDDIGERS!!!
    all the other words written in the post story dont mean s**t and is dishonest!!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/shyscorpio1/ shyscorpio1

    btw… a man cant be high maintenance because no woman would put up with supporting his every want and need, so if a woman look good, bravo for her- but if she acts ugly, somebody needs to check her into a mental hospital before she ends up in a morgue somewhere!
    men come into the picture either supporting himself or he is broke.
    women dont have that pressure on them. they have all the skills and equiptment they need to survive. i have more respect for a woman who works for what she wants and needs-no matter the job- then i would ever have for a pretty girl who thinks somebody should give her money, gifts and things just for breathing while looking great- GIVE ME A F**KING BREAK!!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/savannahdime/ savannahdime

    Why they got to be a gold diggers. They both got what they wanted.. So why you mad at it… hate the game not the player

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/ThaiLuv/ ThaiLuv

    It depends on what needs maintaining. I am high maintenance when it comes to keeping my kitchen clean because constant upkeep on it reduces food-borne illnesses and disease. My maintenance is high when it comes to positive attitude traits. A great deal of upkeep, care and dilligence goes into me paying attention to how speak to others and present myself. When it comes to maintaining my vehicle, believe you me, the level is high. I have over 200,000 miles on it, so I definitely have to be cautious of the behavior of the parts and how I maneuver the vehicle. So in some areas maintaining a high standard is not bad. But when speaking in a material realm, no, it’s not a good idea for it to be consistenly elevated. We are admonished to be content with “sustenance and covering” in the bible. More often than not, we have exaclty what we need, but most of us go overboard because of many factors. Maybe someone was poor when they were young and denied niceties because of lack of money and now they buy everything they want; or maybe someone’s family was rich and they have always had so they will always want to receive. Whatever the situation, satisfying our basic needs should not cause commotion. If more people simplified their life and devoted their time and money to drawing closer to God and investing in the quality of life of their family, the world would be much more tolerable.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/markee5/ markee5

    High maintenance is just a polite way of saying that the person is a pain in the ass to be around.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/0VancouverHurts/ 0VancouverHurts

    @ CARA-MELLO Yes thats right! as ghostface killa said “men and women are not equal” therefore man must take care of woman LOL

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/toodelicious4u/ toodelicious4u

    There’s nothing wrong with being high maintenance! We are the ones that know exactly what we want! Why yall want a bunch of confused b***hes who are willing to settle for less!? Yall men don’t settle for less so why should WE!!!!!? I think that the men who complain about high maintenance chicks are the broke ass men who caint afford to keep a decent woman!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/toodelicious4u/ toodelicious4u

    LMAO!!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/toodelicious4u/ toodelicious4u

    And this is to all the broke ass men talkn about high maintenance chicks are gold digger! You gotta already have it, in order to maintain it!!!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/thekid1986/ thekid1986

    At least Kimora Lee tryin to make her own $$$$$$$$$$.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Sen666/ Sen666

    Eh…whatever floats your boat, I guess! Who cares?! I like to be treated like a princess, so I expect others to treat me how I treat myself, and NO LESS! I get whatever I want through my own hard work, and it is good to be with someone who shares with your ideals. But it would be foolish to be with someone who does not or simply cannot keep up with your lifestyle, no matter what that lifestyle is. Different strokes for different folks…live and let live…and all that jazz! Personally, I don’t care if someone is a gold digger or not…I care about my own money and no one else’s! LOL

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/SoularFlarez/ SoularFlarez

    if you can support that high maintenance lifestyle ON YOUR OWN then kool….

    but alotta people be frontin…..got fly clothes and nice car…. but they eatin oodle noodles every night and they kids walken round lookin dirty

    this can work moreso for women cuz its too many thirsty hyenas who will settle for ANYTHING

    alot of us are just plain old attention wh0res thats all…..flashin that knot of money like a buspass then wonder why U got stuck up lol

    but to each their own !!!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/daygosfinest619/ daygosfinest619

    kimora in this one come on now. i dont think she is a gold digger at all. if she is she digging up some of her own gold. she might not have money like russ. but she duing her thang too

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Red_Clay_Chronicles/ Red_Clay_Chronicles

    Far as the topic…..it is what it is. High maintenance women crack me up, because generally, they start off looking one way in the morning…and end up looking like a completely different person, one all the makeup/fake facial accents/accessories/weave is added. If you can’t hop out of bed, shower up, and look good…3 hrs. getting ready to deceive isn’t going to help…you’ll still be ugly when you take the sh*t off. When a woman can support her lifestyle by herself, I see no problem with it at all. When you start asking for assistance, meaning money for clothes/shoes/hair/accessories, you’ve got the game f*cked up. You’re transitioned from being high maintenance to dependent status without the tax credit. For shorty saying that only broke men don’t want a high maintenance chick….you’re simple. I’m 26 now, I retired when I was 24..so I did well, and still would rather have a naturally beautiful female with no makeup, than have a female that needs time to cake her face on, or sew in her hair in the mornin’. Oh, and for y’all that doubt Kimora’s gold diggerishness, she is for the simple fact that she didn’t have much of anything on her own before she hooked up with Russell. She was modeling, but everything she has now, she got through marriage. Baby Phat was somethin’ that Russell started, and put her on as a “creative director”…when he sold the whole Phat Farm family in ’04, the guy that bought it put her as president of Baby Phat. Yep…she doesn’t even own her own brand…gotta love it.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Toni_Anthony/ Toni_Anthony

    High Maintenance mean’s, “Ho’/Prositute + Trick,” that is all it boil’s down to! Anytime SOMEBODY ask you for thing’s they can’t get for themselves? One has a choice to tell the Broke/Fake B***ch to Eat S*** & Die OR be a Sucker? To live in between those two fact is DRAMA! Nothing but pure Drama!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/diamondbabe1/ diamondbabe1

    just because a female may wear make up and keep her self fixed up doesnt means she is high maintenance, really high maintenance is when a person is in to stuff that is of high quality , some people like to fix up some dont its them ohh well im am a chick who is beautiful with or without make up , and yes I do love quality things but im am humble and believe in the beauty with in , so this topic must be looked at with an open mind saying from different angles, so I agree that its good to be high maintenance to a degree , because the world must have a balance to much of any thing is bad

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/diamondgirl63/ diamondgirl63

    First I would like to say why is Lisaraye even on this list so what she married a man who is running a country she had her own money before him,I cant even call superhead a gold digga cuz obviously she was getting no money that is why she had to go snitchin on people cuz she needed to feed her baby

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/2daTopnonStop/ 2daTopnonStop

    I was digging the article until it ended on the golddigger note~

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/KaMeLaH30/ KaMeLaH30

    Being high maintenance has nothin to do with being a gold digga. Who wants to be with someone thats a burden? I live a certain lifestyle and the man I choose to be with needs to be able to accomidate that. If you cant do for me what I can do for myself then your a hinderance and not a help. When your married its not her money or his money its their money. One person can clean out the other persons bank acct out and theres nothin you can do about it because by law its joint marital property (assets). As for these women that are marrying for money…uh…these men know exactly what theyre getting into when they marry em and if they dont its their fault cuz why would you marry someone you know nothin about? So if a man marries a woman that he knows is a gold digga then that makes him a trick…sounds like holy matrimony to me…theyre both getting what they ask for.

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