Comments on: Worrying About The Marriage Crisis Won’t Help Black Women

By: Shariese Hurd

Shariese Hurd — Sun, 26 Jun 2011 23:54:00 +0000

if we are going to get over it we need to stop blaming the other and look inside ourself if what they say is true. Because we both are the blame somewhat. It’s not what black men or women did. It is how we have both failed in some ways.

By: mrothello61

mrothello61 — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 02:37:38 +0000

The issues are that money is an issue but whom, how and where we get it from is the question to be evaluated. Is it really OK to have the person who will take from this community so capriciously and rob by default the rest of his small needy portion of society; rob them of their safety or peace and wellbeing. A woman’s attitude is more alluring than her body or sweet sounding words, not to mention the solemn portion of character available to her for her whole life, the body fades away.

Let’s take a look at the incremental man who may be around you (by default) and does want to help (his woman & family) you or sees you as a worthwhile individual worthy of love and respect, a sovereign being. I don’t want the black woman to be injured at all; I want you to be safe from the thralls of a criminal consequences or bad repercussions. The carnal mind sees things it wants as it seeks to posses them right away, food, water shelter, money and then there are things like sex, success, class and the need may be valid or greed driven. Let’s not grab the M&M so fast or eat the whole bag right away, but it is forgivable to have been tempted. We all have things to

There are men who do and mean well. It is a moral value system still in operation right now but we don’t see the media playing it up there was a lesson from my youth, my grand mother bless her soul passed in that racial time she used this in order to make up for my grandfather loosing his “good” job. He found another one in good fashion. She latter lost her job because she was seen standing with some ni$$er children to be found that they were her own.

The women and men by tradition did leap frog into the upper middle classes. They worked the way up and stayed married; probably made mistakes or pissed one another off This meant that one would get education and the other would support the couple. There will always be thugs and under-world trappings that appeal to a person’s immediate need. How are we as a people going to get up without really determining what we are fighting for (or about)? Morton Janks movie about “What Black Men Think” is a point getter that we are being deceived

We do as communities of Black men want to be husbands and fathers to preserve their community. I also love my mom, grandmothers, aunts and other ladies in my community. If you think there is a anyone to blame; blame them I wish to meet a woman who upholds me, respects my kind spirit, who understands my boyish playfulness with my inner circle is a free hearted expression of the humanity still surviving in me.

I am a Blackman, who has made some poor choices, yet I uphold the will to change things in the spirit of Sancofa, I know man (humanity) is a frail creature and can be injured or mismanaged so easily mislead by his immediate needs. Being right is not a comfort, being gently corrected is a blessing. Take a nice guy out to lunch, be approachable to politeness and accept some true gifts of the spirit. Do not defend what is wrong, offer what is right to improve your world and harshness is not a black thing.

PS- any child born of a black person is still a black person (at least in America ), do look at the first father(our president), respect the fact of being the first lady or first choiuce .Black women can you see in our limited capability we love you first as all of our heart will allow.

By: mrothello61

mrothello61 — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 13:34:19 +0000

There are many black men who would like and prefer to marry a black woman .but find the lack of coarseness in themselves a barrier it is required that he be more hostile. Mostly blacks in the mid-west but through out the black community in my limited observations; the women remain locked into the community of origion and thus seem to gain an unusual attachment to the worst of the men who are familiar to them. So rather than take on a new person, approach or open opportunity with a guy outside of the old grouping; a person who is trying to step up her continuity is with a self fulfilling prophecy.All the new guys are not rich

Let’s look at him; he is usually recognized as a Vick, trick, soft, or queer because he may speak well, or read more or lack the desperations to; A.) Screw you (you know have sex right away) B. Get money by any means necessary (commit crime) C.) He has a Job* he had to have settled (does not make great money or have a great benefit package) D.) He is not frivolous (He enjoys staying home with you or won’t do the clothes or club thing).

Why would that man stay still to date the black women (collectively?), as she scurries past him through the door to run to the nefarious sagger who has the swagger yet it is in a criminal mindset and pays the way in but renege on all other obligations. Yes sister the man who pays his way into you, unless he thinks that he has full title (maybe but that is iffy), know this that he will replace you when you are bent damaged or unserviceable.

I never made enough money and neither did the late great MJ as shown by the hoarding of cash, we also all wish to have health care. The preference for gate money by sisters from brothers places them at a certain level with him and those who are willing to “out bid” him too; have a feeling about that woman. It is not about the price it is because there is one; what ever the price it looses any intrinsic emotional value. With a little life experience I could see that if you make or realize more cash than me and will not offer to do a nicety or especially a necessity then what kind of partner is she?

By: H_Black_

H_Black_ — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 05:23:28 +0000

When are there going to be articles about black men who have standards. I mean are we as black men suppose to go for any woman who comes our way ? I mean, I like a blk sista that can challenge my intellect on all levels, you know, show me you got knowledge. Woman seem to be the biggest victims of this fictitious reality thats being pumped on us. Fellas we really need to start addressing this situation a bit more loudly because we’re looking real bad.. slavery destroyed the relationship between the black man and black woman and we never recovered from it. When are we going to fix this !!

By: arozendaghetto

arozendaghetto — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:35:47 +0000

Bottom line, if it’s meant to be, you’ll get a man regardless of the male shortage, the number of black men dating white women, and despite how hard your biological clock is ticking. Want what you want. Believe in what you want. Have patience in the time it takes to get what you want. Put it in God’s hands and you will get what you want, without having to lower your standards at all.

Plain and simple ladies. Believe and it shall be. Screw reality’s law of statistics. Be about the business of your future!

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By: soultherapy

soultherapy — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:10:50 +0000

So black man let’s prove them wrong.

By: byrdman82

byrdman82 — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 20:57:02 +0000

I agree about the proganda, & women chase banks instead of men & dreams!

By: Yoshi-Doe

Yoshi-Doe — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 20:15:12 +0000

@ WestsideCartelAtl85,
cosignin’ all the way. I don’t give a damn what anyone says, everything on the t.v., internet, in magazines, etc concerning relationships is all propaganda to me.
F**k the media, and all facets of it.
To control a people, one must control their mind. After all these years, they still dividing us.

By: LiquidSluggz

LiquidSluggz — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 19:23:41 +0000

I know one thing..there ARE a lot of GREAT BLACK MEN out there but theres one major problem as far as I see…a lot of black women chose men who seems to have MONEY. Less relationships are based on love , admiration and respect. More so its about financial security than anything else. And if thats the basis of choosing your man, it will never work and the relationship will fail (and of course it will always be mens fault as if women dont do any wrong – Although MAURY shows different ..lol!) At the end of the day, its mostly about the $$$$ not the man or his caliber!!! for example, i have a friend who couldnt get a girl for the life of him, he was in medical school and broke from the expenses. But his brother who sold drugs and had all the flashy things always had more women than he could handle. Women preferred the flashy guy with the money over they guy they figured was broke and worthless , although hes getting a degree in medicine.

By: Culture

Culture — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 18:56:06 +0000

Its about time, specially black women worrying about what the general thought of them. Most important is for you all to be a positive role model. They already made up their mind about us. So live your live in a good way.

By: eazyE

eazyE — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 18:50:31 +0000

i say date outside…. and dont believe all the marriage hype…….. wasnt there a article stating that “marriage is for white people”……..????

all i can suggest is read steve harvey’s book.. finesse mitchell’s book and the book called “why black men love white women”… it will give u a better insight abt men and how we act.. all i can say is try and keep hope alive…..lol

also it alsi involves the media… look at who controls the media…. unfortunately men of all races dont want american women anymore black or white…

. because allegedly american women and especially black women are called “too materialistic” not loyal and not family oriented….

just look at the SC governor… he left his WHITE wife for an ARGENTINA woman……. white woman are in serious trouble and black women too in america.

why do u think alot of american men are dating and marrying foreign women???
becuase amercian women both black and white have no clue abt tending to a american man’s needs…..

thank you….lol

By: Bemealways1

Bemealways1 — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 18:11:08 +0000

Da illest i agree on tht one. Bt i dnt see y we give in to tht cas i never thought of black women as unattractive. I cnt judge white or asians cas they…idk bt yea this shtuff is silly. You dnt have to give in to this crap. Do you. If u wnt marriage get married if u dnt do wat u do

By: WestsideCartelAtl85

WestsideCartelAtl85 — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 17:06:06 +0000

I feel this marriage crisis is propoganda to mess with Black people’s minds. Especially Black woman. Because the first thing is mention is the attractiveness pyramid. Black is beautiful and the media trys to devalue Black beauty every chance they can. Hollywood is the best example. These movies, commercials, and tv shows don’t show Black couples together at all. Because a Black couple together is a sign of unity and power. Like Chuck D of public enemy said, “They have a fear of a Black planet.” Instead, the media wanna keep on dividing Black people and shows that if you marry or date outside of your race then you arrived or be accepted. Actually that isn’t true at all. Men or women shouldn’t lower their standards to find their suitabale mate. There’s a difference between being picky and selective.

By: Da-illest-Chick

Da-illest-Chick — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 16:59:22 +0000

Its so sad. I’ll tell u one thing tho. I will not settle for less nor will i have a child out of wedlock.