Comments on: PARENTING: Punishment vs Incentives http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/ Black Celebrity Gossip | Relationship Advice | Beauty Tips for Black Women Sat, 11 Feb 2012 03:35:40 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.6 By: 5 Tips For Eating Out With Kids | Hello Beautiful http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/comment-page-1/#comment-949642 5 Tips For Eating Out With Kids | Hello Beautiful Thu, 03 Dec 2009 19:36:44 +0000 http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=491357#comment-949642 [...] Parenting: Punishment vs Incentives [...] [...] Parenting: Punishment vs Incentives [...]

]]> By: BP_MKTGSnagit http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/comment-page-1/#comment-756917 BP_MKTGSnagit Thu, 24 Sep 2009 14:49:41 +0000 http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=491357#comment-756917 I actually had the same type of conversation with my 4 year old this morning. He was spitting in school and was punished (no tv or computer)! Ugh so nasty I know.... any who he saw the commercial for the 3-D Toy Story movie and wants to see it. As the incentive for good behavior and alternative to continued punishment, I told him if he goes to school and behaves himself of course we can go see the movie, but if he's a bad boy he won't get any special privileges! We shall see this evening if this works. I actually had the same type of conversation with my 4 year old this morning. He was spitting in school and was punished (no tv or computer)! Ugh so nasty I know…. any who he saw the commercial for the 3-D Toy Story movie and wants to see it. As the incentive for good behavior and alternative to continued punishment, I told him if he goes to school and behaves himself of course we can go see the movie, but if he’s a bad boy he won’t get any special privileges! We shall see this evening if this works.

]]> By: Fly098 http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/comment-page-1/#comment-756497 Fly098 Thu, 24 Sep 2009 10:42:05 +0000 http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=491357#comment-756497 This is the deal. If she gets her work done fast and talks, that means she's not being challenged. I was a gifted kid and did the same thing. Gifted kids get the work done fast and are bored because they are too advanced but have to wait for the rest of the kids. She needs to be advanced to a level or grade that will challenge her more. I don't think the kid was bad. She was just bored. You have to know what to look for. On the other hand, if she was not getting her work done and making good grades and talking, she needs her butt whipped for talking because she is just being disruptive and needs to buckle down.That's that. We don't need to whip our kids for everything and it's important to know where to draw the line. This is the deal. If she gets her work done fast and talks, that means she’s not being challenged. I was a gifted kid and did the same thing. Gifted kids get the work done fast and are bored because they are too advanced but have to wait for the rest of the kids. She needs to be advanced to a level or grade that will challenge her more. I don’t think the kid was bad. She was just bored. You have to know what to look for.

On the other hand, if she was not getting her work done and making good grades and talking, she needs her butt whipped for talking because she is just being disruptive and needs to buckle down.That’s that. We don’t need to whip our kids for everything and it’s important to know where to draw the line.

]]> By: shindogg http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/comment-page-1/#comment-751697 shindogg Wed, 23 Sep 2009 05:01:41 +0000 http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=491357#comment-751697 i dont see the big deal. so what if she likes to talk. i would rather hear about notes than to hear the kid got in a fight because the other kid on the playground thought it was funny to bully them. i would encourage the kid to keep talkin in class. its better than bein the kind of kid who doesnt talk at all and never has any friends because they never talk to people. or even worse, nobody like them and calls them names like "ugly" and "stupid" and tells them to shut up when they try to be friendly and tells them not to look at them because they want to be a horse's as and hurt their feelins. ever hear a kid say "do you have a starin problem" then you say "no" and the kid says "then dont look at me"and mister ashole below me, its wrong to hit kids and its straight up demonic to spank (or beat) with a belt or any other object. kids will not likely have adult-level reasoning, and therefore will not know youre "helpin" them but rather, think youre a "meanie" or a "grown up bully" for hurtin them and if they hate you enough they can get older (and maybe bigger and stronger) and take out that pent up aggression on you one day (possibly when youre old and frail for example), which may or may not cause required hospital care and/or a painful death. also, think of what you cannot do to a fully grown person and apply that tenfold to a child (because of how sensitive and delicate they are) and see how wrong it is to do that even in the name of "makin them mind". this is why michael jackson hated his dad up until the very hour he died (R.I.P MJ the King of Pop). its because his dad hit him when he was growin up. how is it that its "assault" if somebody hits a grown person, even if its done by a child, but if an adult hits them its "discipline"?! thats a crock of SHHIT! let kids swear, let kids be loud and talk alot, let kids not study and flunk their subjects, let kids eat whatever food they fucckin please, let kids stay up late, then teach them early on that its not ok to have sex before marriage and not to pick fights but if someone says "make me" when the kid says "stop callin me names" thats its ok to stand up for yourself and hit them, and if the other kid hits you first, go ahead and hit them back. its not like they will be allowed to hit people when they get older, and if that anger stays in a person it can cause serious problems later in life. why should a kid have to suffer because the "good parentin" was really bad parentin and it just made them a big fat pus$y and then they want to blame other people who have nothin to do with it because they have this unfinished business in their hearts. kids will be kids. i know im never becomin a parent because my kid would sooner end up expelled before he or she would end up in the hospital because some fucc face thought it was ok to give them a broken nose because they "looked at them wrong". there is no such thing as "knowin when to keep your mouth shut" because a closed mouth doesnt get fed. cosby says education keeps kids out of prison. dont make me laugh! half the people in prison are probably there because of somethin that either happened in school or happened when they got out because of what they had to deal with in there which triggered the response in a given situation. if more kids were homeschooled, the world would be a better place. not a perfect place, but a better one. a kid would be better off gettin in trouble for truancy (a fuccked up law that shouldnt exist by the way because i believe it violates part of the constitutional right to choose whether you want an education or not. no i dont care if thats not in the constitution because it SHOULD be anyway) than stayin school and goin through a waste of 12 fucckin years that still will not guarantee you a job that you actually both WANT and are ABLE to be hired to do. after gettin out of school, who in their right mind wants to do even more schoolin? and if that aint enough, then some jobs will require experience too and the kid'll think "now where the fucck im goin to get that? dont i have to be hired first in order to GET that experience on the job?!" and lets not even think about how the economy is bad and may not be better for a while. theres just too much bullshyit goin on. its enough to cause a heartache or an ulcer or somethin. sorry i had to drag comment on. i just had a HUGE thought i wanted to get out. i dont see the big deal. so what if she likes to talk. i would rather hear about notes than to hear the kid got in a fight because the other kid on the playground thought it was funny to bully them. i would encourage the kid to keep talkin in class. its better than bein the kind of kid who doesnt talk at all and never has any friends because they never talk to people. or even worse, nobody like them and calls them names like “ugly” and “stupid” and tells them to shut up when they try to be friendly and tells them not to look at them because they want to be a horse’s as and hurt their feelins. ever hear a kid say “do you have a starin problem” then you say “no” and the kid says “then dont look at me”and mister ashole below me, its wrong to hit kids and its straight up demonic to spank (or beat) with a belt or any other object. kids will not likely have adult-level reasoning, and therefore will not know youre “helpin” them but rather, think youre a “meanie” or a “grown up bully” for hurtin them and if they hate you enough they can get older (and maybe bigger and stronger) and take out that pent up aggression on you one day (possibly when youre old and frail for example), which may or may not cause required hospital care and/or a painful death. also, think of what you cannot do to a fully grown person and apply that tenfold to a child (because of how sensitive and delicate they are) and see how wrong it is to do that even in the name of “makin them mind”. this is why michael jackson hated his dad up until the very hour he died (R.I.P MJ the King of Pop). its because his dad hit him when he was growin up. how is it that its “assault” if somebody hits a grown person, even if its done by a child, but if an adult hits them its “discipline”?! thats a crock of SHHIT! let kids swear, let kids be loud and talk alot, let kids not study and flunk their subjects, let kids eat whatever food they fucckin please, let kids stay up late, then teach them early on that its not ok to have sex before marriage and not to pick fights but if someone says “make me” when the kid says “stop callin me names” thats its ok to stand up for yourself and hit them, and if the other kid hits you first, go ahead and hit them back. its not like they will be allowed to hit people when they get older, and if that anger stays in a person it can cause serious problems later in life. why should a kid have to suffer because the “good parentin” was really bad parentin and it just made them a big fat pus$y and then they want to blame other people who have nothin to do with it because they have this unfinished business in their hearts. kids will be kids. i know im never becomin a parent because my kid would sooner end up expelled before he or she would end up in the hospital because some fucc face thought it was ok to give them a broken nose because they “looked at them wrong”. there is no such thing as “knowin when to keep your mouth shut” because a closed mouth doesnt get fed. cosby says education keeps kids out of prison. dont make me laugh! half the people in prison are probably there because of somethin that either happened in school or happened when they got out because of what they had to deal with in there which triggered the response in a given situation. if more kids were homeschooled, the world would be a better place. not a perfect place, but a better one. a kid would be better off gettin in trouble for truancy (a fuccked up law that shouldnt exist by the way because i believe it violates part of the constitutional right to choose whether you want an education or not. no i dont care if thats not in the constitution because it SHOULD be anyway) than stayin school and goin through a waste of 12 fucckin years that still will not guarantee you a job that you actually both WANT and are ABLE to be hired to do. after gettin out of school, who in their right mind wants to do even more schoolin? and if that aint enough, then some jobs will require experience too and the kid’ll think “now where the fucck im goin to get that? dont i have to be hired first in order to GET that experience on the job?!” and lets not even think about how the economy is bad and may not be better for a while. theres just too much bullshyit goin on. its enough to cause a heartache or an ulcer or somethin. sorry i had to drag comment on. i just had a HUGE thought i wanted to get out.

]]> By: Kountry_Mayne http://hellobeautiful.com/mommy-beautiful/blackandmarriedwithkidscom/parenting-punishment-vs-incentives/comment-page-1/#comment-751087 Kountry_Mayne Wed, 23 Sep 2009 01:36:32 +0000 http://hellobeautiful.com/?p=491357#comment-751087 good parenting is the key to raising good kids. punishment is also another very important key that isnt used enough. Spankings using a belt is one of those things that should not be ruled or lawed against. Some kids you are not able to talk to and they will continue to talk back to you. the belt corrects that evilness. And im not saying to spank your kids until they turn blue and purple. But spank them so you know it hurts and you see that it hurts. Its almost like teaching a dog not to piss on the carpet. good parenting is the key to raising good kids. punishment is also another very important key that isnt used enough. Spankings using a belt is one of those things that should not be ruled or lawed against. Some kids you are not able to talk to and they will continue to talk back to you. the belt corrects that evilness. And im not saying to spank your kids until they turn blue and purple. But spank them so you know it hurts and you see that it hurts. Its almost like teaching a dog not to piss on the carpet.

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