Lil Mama was open about everything; from where she is now musically to her excitement around her gig as a judge on “Randy Jackson Presents America’s Best Dance Crew.” Smart, funny and humble, the rapper and TV personality even opened up about her evolved position on her 2009 MTV VMAs snafu with Jay-Z and Alicia Keys during “Empire State of Mind.”

Planning a brunch? Check out these hot spots in Lil Mama’s hometown of Brooklyn

Lil Mama’s newest project is called “Hustler Girl.” The song is a tribute to all women. The native New Yorker has come a long way from the fun, poppy sounds of “Lip Gloss” and is still evolving. During our adventure at the Afrocentric Bebenoir Boutique Lil Mama was even game for a little fashion makeover fun.

The Voice of the Young People continues to pour her heart and pain into her music. Listen to Hustler Girl on this link and check out our exclusive Lil Mama interview here for “Abiola’s Kiss and Tell TV.” Oh -and I thought that she was evading my relationship question but it turns out that Lil Mama is just madly in love with herself– a lesson for us all to keep relearning.

Watch!

Hit Lil Mama up in the comments and tell her what you think. Buy “Hustler Girl” right now on iTunes. Find me on twitter @abiolatv and AbiolaTV.com for the best in love, lifestyle and celebrities.

Diane Farr confesses in the book that due to “white girl privilege” she didn’t imagine that she would ever be rejected by anyone’s family because of race. The book is unique as Farr includes thoughtful interviews with interracial couples of all backgrounds and age groups. Recently, I sat down with Diane Farr in Manhattan to discuss Kissing Outside the Lines: A True Story of Love and Race and Happily Ever After, now available wherever you buy books.

Check out my interview video with Diane Farr here and share your thoughts below. You can also let me know what you think on twitter @abiolatv and AbiolaTV.com.

Watch the video!

Why Is Race Still A Factor When It Comes To Dating?

VIDEO: Jill Scott On Interracial Dating, “We Should Hold On To Our Culture”

Remember 90s singer Cece Peniston? Put it this way, youngsters. If you were looking for a party then she had the hits. Cece was the gorgeous woman who brought the fun.

Check out three questions with Cece Peniston and find out what she’s been up to.

Abiola Abrams: Hey, Lady Cece! We hope that life is good for you. Please tell us about your most recent musical album.

Cece Peniston: It will show the growth but it is in the dance vein cause what is better than a dance diva doing dance. I think people will find that with the sound of the music I still want to get people on their feet to have a good time. I’m doing more modern stuff too I’m working with Paul Okenfold, and Junior Sanchez,  and Laid Back Luke.

Abiola: Sounds great. Now, Cece, you were candid enough to share your very personal story about having body sculpting in the press. How has your life been since that process?

Cece Peniston: (laughs) If I didn’t share it someone will find out anyway. I wasn’t ashamed because it was a way for me to improve my look and it is so talked about now that it is no big deal. The thing I liked about the process is that is makes me more accountable to myself and to my body about what I’m eating. It’s a lifestyle change. I love the results and I’m glad I did it.

Abiola: Fabulous! Congrats. Last question. What inspires you, diva?

Cece Peniston: I’m inspired by life moments, dreaming and the possibility of. I’m inspired by love and friends. Many things inspire me but mostly love. I’m a very sentimental person and sometimes its the smallest things that inspire me. Sometimes it a word a smile or a gesture.

Abiola: Thanks for sharing. Keep being fab and we look forward to the music.

——

Abiola Abrams, the love journalist and lifestyle passionista, is an author and broadcaster based in NYC. Find all the good stuff at AbiolaTV.com . Follow her on facebook and twitter @abiola; plus find Abiola talking about lifestyle, celebrities, relationships and more on BBC Radio where she is an outspoken international entertainment correspondent.

What’s CeCe Peniston Up To These Days?

While we await each new Jill Scott musical creation with baited breath, we love and respect her acting projects as well. We were especially proud when Jill Scott won a Peabody Award for the outstanding HBO series, “The Number 1 Ladies Detective Agency.” It was unanimous. We were hungry for this positive content and were looking forward to more.

As of this writing, however, there have been no new contracts signed to bring the series back and Jill Scott needs our help. Specifically, she needs us to contact the brass at HBO and let them know that we want more of Jill Scott and “The Number 1 Ladies Detective Agency.” We know that write in campaigns have worked before.

Check out what Jill Scott has to say about her new album, new video and how to bring back “The Number 1 Ladies Detective Agency.”

Abiola:    Ms. Jill Scott, Philly’s finest, our poet, singer, actress and all around goddess. Thank you for your art and your work.  We are really excited about your new project, “The Light of the Sun.” This is your first Warner Brothers album. Tell us about it.

Jill Scott:    “The Light of the Sun” is my fourth studio album.  It is refreshing, warm, and revealing.  There is some jazz, some funk and definitely some old school hip-hop. Some poetry, some sexiness, some vulnerability, bravado.  It is a really a journey.  The entire record is a journey, a trip.

Abiola:    It is an amazing project.  I have heard a few of the tracks: “So Blessed,” “Hear my Call,” “So in Love,” and I know that you just shot a video for “Shame.”  You talk about the sexiness, the bravado, the jazz. Is that in “Shame,” the music video?

Jill Scott:    “Shame” was a song that happened by accident, like most of the record.  I love that.  We were in the studio, a couple of friends and I and we were looking, just free styling.  You know, still called to cipher.  So, we were having a cipher.  J.R. Hudson, the executive producer, along with me, for the record was playing some old school beats.  And, “The Magnificent” beat came on and I just sang and those are the words that I sang and the guys that I was hanging out with were singing background.

You know, they are not singers, so they all joined in and started singing and they were like yeah, that is fun and I thought, yeah it is.  I got a chance to get a little aggression off.  You know, make people want to do the Kid N Play play.

Abiola:    You are taking it back! So Jill, you mean to tell me that we can still find Jill Scott, Peabody Award Winner, in a Philly Cipher?

Jill Scott:    Absolutely. I love hip-hop and I love to hear MC’s think out loud.  That is what hip-hop really is for me.  It is storytellers telling their stories out loud.  I do not have to agree or disagree. All I have to do is listen to the story, and if they give me a visual picture then that is hip-hop to me.  That is a good MC.

Jill Scott & Anthony Hamilton Are “So In Love” [NEW VIDEO]

Abiola:    Yes and you are an incredible storyteller and a wonderful painter.

Jill Scott:    I am taking the title MC and I am taking it.

Abiola:    MC Jill Scott.  I love it.  You are an MC in every sense.  If we take it all the way, back to when the MC was the mic controller.

Jill Scott:    That is what I am talking about.

Abiola:    Like Rakim said you drop the mic when you are finished and let it smoke.

Jill Scott:    That’s right.

Abiola:    Let’s talk now, Jill, about your project that you shot in Botswana for which you won the Peabody Award, “Number One Lady’s Detective Agency.”  What a refreshing work of art.  Is that coming back?  Is there more?

Jill Scott:    That is a hope.  It is the hope, we have been having people writing to HBO and let them know that they want to see the show again.  One of the few shows on television that did not have any real violence, sex or cursing.  It was just a family show in a great environment and what happened is that I was pregnant when I was shooting last season, first season, and I had to stop after, I think I was seven months pregnant when I came home.  I was showing too much.

Abiola:    Who should people address their letters to at HBO, Jill?  We are going to get an HBO writing campaign going to bring back “Number One Lady’s Detective Agency.”  Whom do they address it to?

Jill Scott:    Fantastic.  I have been sending letters to programming@HBO.com.

Abiola:    Programming at HBO.  Okay. Done! Well thank you so much for sharing with us and we will continue to bask in “The Light of the Sun.”  We will get that HBO writing campaign going for “The Number One Ladies Detective Agency.”

Jill Scott:    You can find me on Twitter @MissJillScott and online Missjillscott.com.

Abiola:    And where can they find your new album “The Light of the Sun”?

Jill Scott:    You can find “Light of the Sun” on iTunes.  You can pre-order it now.  But, it comes out officially in June, June 21st.

Abiola:    Okay, well thank you very much, sister.  You keep on shining.  Thank you so much for your light, Jill Scott .

Jill Scott:    Thank you it was a pleasure.

Abiola Abrams, the love journalist and lifestyle passionista, is an author and broadcaster based in NYC. Find a video and full text of this Jill Scott “Light of the Sun” interview and many others at AbiolaTV.com. Follow Abiola on facebook and twitter @abiola. Find Abiola talking about celebrities, relationships and more on BBC Radio where she is a fun and outspoken international entertainment correspondent.

Jill Scott’s “The Light Of The Sun” Album Cover Revealed [PHOTO]

Laurieann Gibson:     Good morning, Abiola, how are you today?

Abiola Abrams:    Hi, there, Laurieann, I am thrilled to be talking to the queen of BoomKack herself.

Laurieann Gibson:    I’m so happy that you’re thrilled.  What a blessing.

Abiola:    First of all, Laurieann, I’m so proud of you with your new show. Girl, you leave your blood, sweat, tears, and passion on the dance floor, on the screen, all over everybody’s shoes. Tell us all about your new E! show “The Dance Scene.”

Laurieann Gibson:    The new E! show “The Dance Scene” is beyond hot.  I mean it’s remarkable and besides it being an incredible blessing. Ryan Seacrest being genius and the network E! being like visionaries, it’s a roller-coaster ride.  It’s like the reality of the dance world, the professional, not a trophy world.  The reality is my world everyday as a creative director, as someone who came up from nothing and is just continuing a site to provide information and help.  And that’s the biggest part of my gift is I pull what I pull out of people and help the fulfill their dreams so what am I left with?

It shows that, my personal life, how do I maintain the inspiration for today’s No. 1 artists and how to I make sure my dancers don’t do what I went through, how do I make sure they don’t give up, how do I birth new artists?  It’s a roller-coaster ride of information.

Laurieann Gibson Shows Off Dancer Body In YRB Mag [PHOTOS]

Abiola:     It’s a roller-coaster ride of information, but I would also say, LaurieAnn, it’s a roller-coaster ride of inspiration.  Girl, you said you came from nothing.  I’m picturing you coming from Toronto on the Greyhound bus.  Tell our listeners how you got started.

Laurieann Gibson:    Well I’ve been dancing from a young child.  I believe I was dancing in the healthy realms.  My mom says I have all the scars on her to prove it, but born and raised in Toronto, Canada and just had the heart and the passion for the dance, and just had a hunger to survive and came to my circumstance and something was calling me that was bigger than myself, a desire to help and inspire and through the dance.  I couldn’t understand it as a young girl, so I jumped on Greyhound bus.  I studied at Alvin Ailey and put in the time, paid my dues, stuck on the floors and had lots of roaches and rats as friends, and just persevered.

Uptown Records, Mary J Blige,  Puff Daddy, Missy Elliott, just kept moving and then the Jonas Brothers, Alicia Keys, different opportunities, they expand.  Jonas Brothers and then finally meeting Lady Gaga and having all my armor and all of what it takes, the bullets of my guns to bring a very talented girl from the beginning of her career to where she is now.

Abiola:    Yes! I let people on AbiolaTV.com, Facebook and Twitter @abiolatv know that I was going to be interviewing you and they all said you were an inspiration to them.  So I have to ask you, Laurieann, what inspires you, what makes you keep going when you’re tired and over it?

Laurieann Gibson:    It’s a grateful heart, gratitude even when it gets really tough, I just believe that someone else unfortunately doesn’t have it as good, their circumstances, their lack of access but their desire is the same so ultimately I feel sometimes this deep, burning desire to get every young person to understand what they’re capable of doing and not what they can’t do, and there’s not a lot of hope, and there need to be hope.  Enough of the liars, enough of the people telling people what they can’t do.  We’re only as good as our next generation so I just feel compelled to tell the truth, let them know, if I can do it with nothing, without a famous last name, without a lot of money, then I am proof that you can be who you dream yourself to be.

And that is nobody’s telling you it’s because they’re intimidated by you.  They’re intimidated by what God has blessed you with, something in you that’s natural and that’s gifted specifically for you, and that you’re enough.  And so it’s a desire to see people succeed instead of like one man on top with twenty cars, you know what I mean?

Abiola:     Okay, I guess you were just “Born This Way,” right?

Laurieann Gibson:     Yes, “God makes no mistakes!”

Abiola:     All right, so you’re not going to get out of here and talk to Abiola, the Love Journalist, without us talking about love, Laurieann.

Laurieann Gibson:     Oh, my goodness. (laughs)

Abiola:     Well we want to get all in your business.  Now what made you decide, LaurieAnn, to come out of the closet with your relationship with your man?  Basically, you guys have been business partners for years but no one really knew what was going on.  What made you say, okay, now’s the time to bring it out?

Laurieann Gibson:     And did I bring it out?  (laughter) I’m still in denial.  I’m in denial because it took so long, it takes so long.  You cover your heart, you work with a lot of male artists and part of being single, and it’s just, it can be an ugly business, and there was a fear of, oh, they’re not going to be there for me, and there was a dedication and commitment to my artists that I would provide.  They don’t have to feel weak, like call me anytime.  The creative energy was just always there.  So I was just living in fear and what allowed me to understanding when Joe was a friend and a supporter and somebody who began to remind me of my ability and what I was doing, and let go of those insecurities and that manipulation.

I just really know that through his unconditional love, God has delivered me from those insecurities, and it’s like, if they want to hire me because I have a man, then –

Abiola:     Then so be it, then so be it.

Laurieann Gibson:    But I’m still in denial a little bit.

Abiola:    Well is Joe your soul mate, Laurieann?

Laurieann Gibson:    I’m not going to say that.  I don’t know.  I mean, I do know but –

Abiola:    Okay, well is he – okay, let’s put it this way, is he your Steadman?

Laurieann Gibson:    You know what, yes, all right, at this moment in time I will say, yes.  When I have a ring on my finger –

Abiola:     Okay, note to Joe, note to Joe, somebody let him know.  All right, so what can we see coming up for the rest of this exciting season of The Dance Scene?

Laurieann Gibson:    There’s some really good work, but I don’t want to tell you everything! (laughs)

Abiola:    Well we are toasting champagne glasses with you, LaurieAnn Gibson, we will be watching and I wish you nothing but love, continued beauty and happiness, all good things.

Laurieann Gibson:    Thank you so much, that is so sweet, and thank you for the encouragement, I really appreciate it.

Abiola Abrams, known as the Lifestyle Passionista is a love journalist, MTV Made Ladies Man Coach and BBC Entertainment Correspondent. Find her weekly web TV series on her award-winning blog at AbiolaTV.com.
Watch Laurieann grows frustrated with a director that doesn’t share her vision for her new group’s music video:

Sarah sneaks out of the house to meet up with her ex for the first time since their split. Will she get the closure she needs?

Ludacris:     Hey Abiola, what’s going on?

Abiola:     Hey Luda.  I am really really excited to talk to you about this mission. Safe sex is a critical issue. Tell our Hello Beautiful readers all about your collabo with Trojan Magnum Condoms Live Large project.

Ludacris:    Well, I can definitely say that I have been a huge fan and supporter of the project for quite some time.  Like you said just being safe is an extremely necessary part of living and I think that is extremely important so with that being said, this was of course about being safe but also in giving a few out there a chance of becoming an artist and to see that they can also live by the gold standard I like to say.

Abiola:    The gold standard.  Yes. That is exactly what we’ve been talking about  with our safe sex pledge and movement  on my web series at AbiolaTV.com. Explain to readers what you mean and how your hip hop emcee contest works.

Ludacris:    Exactly. I am sure you have heard about the contest and everything that is going on and giving people a chance not only online but around the country to show what they have and their skills. Download from MagnumLiveLarge.com-- we have different beats and everything is all geared up for this.  You would win five thousand dollar prize, a trip to Miami, and a chance to perform on stage at Spring Fest, 2011, which is coming up soon.  So, it is really just getting the excitement out there and letting people know.  I remember being a young and hungry emcee and wishing for opportunities like this and to team up with Magnum is just great.  It is a lifestyle and it is a great thing.

Abiola:    It is a lifestyle, Luda. Well said. Have you been already listening to the rap entries.  Is the “next big thing,” as Magnum would say, out there?

Ludacris:    Maybe it is more of a screening process for them, but I guess you can say tonight, I am actually in New York City . This is the last time of all the local places because we went to San Francisco, we went to Detroit and went to Miami and tonight apart from the people who can post their stuff online, it will be the last actual show where all the MC’s in New York will be able to perform.

Abiola:    Why is the safe sex movement and condom awareness important to you, Luda?

Ludacris:    You know for me obvious reasons but to protect yourself from definitely STD’s and there’s lots of teenage pregnancies going on so you have to protect yourself and you have to be safe.  You definitely want to make sure you are on top of your game and stay focused and you need to stay safe.

Abiola:    Well Luda, it has been great talking to you.

Ludacris:    Appreciate it, Abiola, and definitely tell everybody out there to stay safe.

Abiola:    Absolutely. Give us the websites and the information one more time. There may be some aspiring female rappers reading this who want to enter and diversify your competition.

Ludacris:    MagnumLiveLarge.com.  It will be top four emcees that are on there and when they submit entries will get five thousand dollars and a trip to Miami at the Sands to perform live on stage at the Spring Fest in Miami this coming up in April.  So make sure you check it out.

Abiola Abrams, known as the Lifestyle Passionista is a love journalist and MTV Made Ladies Man Coach and BBC Entertainment Correspondent. Find her weekly web TV series, the audio of her full interview with Ludacris on her award-winning blog at AbiolaTV.com and take her official Safe Sex Pledge as she gears up for July 4th, 2011, which she has declared the first ever National Safe Sex Day.

Ludacris & Girlfriend At “No Strings Attached” Premiere [PHOTOS]

Ludacris & His Girlfriend Jet Set Out Of D.C. [PHOTOS]

According to Kimora’s team, “her number one priority remains her three children (Aoki, Ming and baby Kenzo) and husband, actor Djimon Hounsou, and Kimora remains intent on giving her brood the best family life possible.”

Here are Kimora Lee Simmons’ top tips for Loving in the Fab Lane:

1. “For a relationship, I think one great tip is that you should always love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, take care of yourself, cater to yourself and that little inner voice, you will really not be very worthy of being with someone else, because you won’t be the best version of you.”

2. “I look for someone is strong. I feel like my husband is very strong, distinguished, very sexy, very humble, very sweet, very loving.”

3. “Don’t allow someone to be a jerk. Don’t allow someone to disrespect you. listen to the bigger voice in your head telling you that you deserve the best, whatever that is – whatever that is you decide you like for yourself.”

4. “Don’t accept less than what it is that you know that you want.”

5. “Sometimes you’re the one shining and sometimes you’re the one supporting. I also know how to play my role and my responsibility very well.”

Great advice all around, Kimora! We’ll see you on Season 4 of “Kimora: Life In the Fab Lane,” the Style Network’s biggest hit! “Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane” airs on Style’s “Sundaylicious” nights at 9pm ET/PT.

Abiola Abrams, the Love Journalist, is an Author and Media Personality living in NYC. Catch her on MTV’s Made as a Ladies Man Coach and as an entertainment Correspondent on the BBC. You can find outtakes and the full Kimora Lee Simmons interview, audio and video, on Abiola’s award winning blog The Passionista Playbook at AbiolaTV.com. The new season of her web series premieres on March 9th, and catch her in this month’s Essence Magazine talking love and sex.The new season of her web series premieres on March 9th, and catch her in this month’s Essence Magazine talking love about love and sex.

Kimora Lee Simmons Dishes On “Life In The Fab Lane” & Says Goodbye To The Past

Kimora Lee Simmons Goes Shopping At The Grove [PHOTOS]

As her team says, “Whether she’s taking over fashion week or entertaining her kids at home, Kimora does everything she undertakes with a singular style that continues to defy definition.”

Catch the new one-hour episodes of “Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane” Sunday nights at 9pm ET/PT on the Style Network.

Abiola: Kimora, congrats on Season 4 of “Life in the Fab Lane!” Ok, let’s talk business. Baby Phat is out. No more Baby Phat for you. That’s their loss. Now, it’s all about Kouture by Kimora. What is the difference between these two brands?

Kimora: Well, for me, Baby Phat is – I’m no longer with that company – and I’m moving on with Kouture and KLS Design Group which is under its umbrella. For example, Hello Kitty and KLS which is higher-end contemporary lines. But Kouture is in Macy’s now and it’s young and fun.

The great thing about it is that nothing on the line is over, I would say $50.00. You can get a really great-fitting little black dress or cocktail dress that’s $40.00.

Abiola: Kind of a recession chicness for us recessionistas.

Kimora: Yes. I always say that my line is recession-proof!

Abiola: We love that. What is the top Kimora relationship tip?

Kimora: I think one great tip is that you should always love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, take care of yourself, cater to yourself and that little inner voice, you will really not be very worthy of being with someone else, because you won’t be the best version of you.

Abiola: Well said. Now, Kimora, you also have a skin-care line launching Spring 2011. Tell us about that.

Kimora: I have a skin-care line. It’s called Shinto Clinical. It’s http://shintoclinical.com. I think it’s really great because, again, this was my whole thing I was saying about evolve and a new you, a new decade, and I feel like my responsibilities have changed – my fashion, my style, my sensibility – and skin and beauty is a big focus for a lot of women who are our age. Our age being anywhere from 23 to 53 and everything above and beyond and in between.

It combines Eastern treatments with cutting-edge technology, and it’s what I use on my own skin.

Abiola: We look forward to it. Last question, Kimora, what is the biggest misconception about you, do you think?

Kimora: Sometimes you can take it or sometimes you can’t.

Abiola: Okay! All right, well, then just leave us with a little of Kimora’s words of inspiration and fabulosity!

Kimora: A little word of fabulosity – I don’t know! I have so many words on my little Twitter – are you on Twitter?

Abiola: Yes, I’m on Twitter @AbiolaTV.

Kimora: Okay, I’m @OfficialKimora. Tell all of your readers that. A word of advice I would have is to be fabulous. Believe in yourself. Do the best that you can. Live honestly to a higher note. Life is too short. So, do the best you can and live your life to a higher note.

Abiola: That was beautiful. I just want to say thank you, Kimora, for being your beautiful self, and thank you for showing women what author Marianne Williamson says: When we shine, we unconsciously give others the permission to do the same.

Kimora: Oh, I love Marianne Williamson! I love that. I’m gonna tweet that. Thank you.

Get on board for a wild ride when the fourth season of “Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane” airs on Style’s “Sundaylicious” night at 9pm ET/PT. “Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane” is produced by Left/Right for The Style Network. Ken Druckerman, Banks Tarver, and Mike Nichols from Left/Right, Sarah Weidman from Style and Kimora Lee Simmons serve as executive producers for the series.

—-
Abiola Abrams, the Love Journalist, is an Author and Media Personality living in NYC. Catch her on MTV’s Made as a Ladies Man Coach and as an entertainment Correspondent on the BBC. You can find outtakes and the full Kimora Lee Simmons interview, audio and video, on Abiola’s award winning blog The Passionista Playbook at http://www.AbiolaTV.com. The new season of her web series premieres on March 9th, and catch her in this month’s Essence Magazine talking love and sex.

Take a look at the trailer for “Life In The Fab Lane” Season 4:

Kimora & Djimon Want More Kids

Kimora Lee Simmons & Djimon Hounsou’s Lunch Date PDA [PHOTOS]

Well, I am pleased to report that I found a thriving Afro German community and became an official Berlin Homegirl. Some Afrodeutsche families have lived in Germany for a couple hundred years. Afro-Berliners are not only descendants of African American World War II GIs, but many biracial people are the children of African fathers who left them to be raised by their German mothers.

Are you ready to travel? More than 75 percent of Americans don’t have a passport. Do you have yours? The world is yours. Claim it. Here’s what to do in Berlin, Germany.

1. Massai Restaurant

Goltzstr. 35, 10781 Berlin
www.massai-berlin.de/en/index.html
In my humble opinion most German food is disgusting. At first the only barely edible food I found was at pommes frites joints (french fries) or Turkish food carts. Thanks goodness for Massai Restaurant. Are you looking to sample genuine out-of-the-box African recipes like ostrich soup, gazelle meat, crocodile fillet or zebra steak? Massai has them on the menu. This Eritrean restaurant is also a good place to meet local Berliners. Be sure to indulge in Massai’s bountiful South African wines. Dress casually. They don’t accept credit cards but they do accept reservations.

2. Club Cassiopeia
Revaler Strasse 99 bdWarschauer Strasse Berlin
www.cassiopeia-berlin.de
Say word. Germany has the 3rd largest hip hop market in the world. I saw Jay-Z on posters in the subway. Who knew? Berlin is a young city, legendary for its nightlife, so you have to investigate the club scene. When I last checked Cassiopeia has hip hop on Wednesdays, but also check the dancehall schedules for hot spots like Bohannon, Shrine or Calabash if that’s what you’re into.

3. The Wall
www.eastsidegallery-berlin.de
It’s been over 20 years since the fall of the wall separating East Germany and West Germany. There’s not much left to see but it’s worth checking out the East Side Gallery and the Checkpoint Charlie “You are leaving the American sector” Museum. Mostly so that you can say you did.

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4. Shopping on Kurfürstendamm
The super-fab Kurfürstendamm is the most famous shopping street in Berlin. It’s called Ku’damm for short. You can find anything in this luxury area. If you like people watching or window shopping then you’ll enjoy Ku’damm too. Check out the side streets for all of the inexpensive deals on the good stuff. On some nights musicians and street entertainers gather in front of the burned out Kaiser Wilhelm Church Memorial for impromptu jam sessions.

5. The Egyptian Museum of Berlin

Ägyptisches Museum und Papyrussammlung im Neuen Museum Bodestr. 1-3 Berlin
www.egyptian-museum-berlin.com
If you’re in Germany and you get the opportunity please visit this museum. The original artifacts are some of the most awe-inspiring outside of Egypt. Mummies, masks, jewelry, segments of a palace floor, galleries and more. I really wish they hadn’t removed these items from Egypt but here they are. Breathtaking. Entry to the museum costs 10 euros for adults. Oh– and the Egyptian Museum of Berlin has a really unique gift shop.

6. Fountainhead Tanz Theater & Black International Cinema Berlin
www.black-international-cinema.com
Fountainhead Tanz Theater is a Berlin based dance, performance and distribution production company. They also produce Black International Cinema Berlin, a TV show called The Collegium and other diverse projects. African American Professors Gayle and Donald Griffith moved to Berlin and created these cultural institutions to engage people from different backgrounds. Join their mailing list for the latest events.

7. The Berlinale International Film Festival
Potsdamer Straße 5 10785 Berlin
www.berlinale.de/en/HomePage.html
I know, I know. The thought of Germany in the winter time does not sound enticing but the Berlinale Film Festival is worth it. Throw on your gloves, ear muffs and long underwear for one of the oldest film festivals in the world. Hang with folks from South America to South Africa as you watch and discuss film, arts, and politics.

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8. Popkomm
www.popkommlive.com
Popkomm is a huge world music entertainment and business festival plus congress. If you have any interest in the music biz or just like meeting creative folks from all over the world then you should definitely visit. The Popkomm market place and trade show is the place to make business deals, sell your own music or just learn about the industry. This year Popkomm was held at the Airport Berlin Tempelhof. There are also Pokomm concerts and awards. Also worth the trip is the Africa Festival, “International Afro Music Festival” in Wurzburg Germany about 3 hours away.

9. Anne Frank Museum

Anne Frank Zentrum Rosenthaler Straße 39 Berlin
www.annefrank.de

The purpose of the Anne Frank Zentrum is to document the life of an optimistic girl who didn’t survive the German Holocaust. If you’re traveling with children they’ll really enjoy the Anne Frank Museum as it features videos from children worldwide and personal artifacts from the time period.

10. Everyday Berlin
You’re on foreign soil. Just take in the culture. If you dare, Berlin offers naked sunbathing in Tiergarten Park and clothing optional aka nude beach Lake Wannsee. You can get German beer from any Berlin McDonalds. The subway may be of interest plus there’s Berlin’s general bohemian vibe. I stayed in Mitte, the center of Berlin. You may want to check in with the Goethe Institut Washington DC. They just finished an Afro German film series. For safety reasons avoid Marzahn or Lichtenberg.

You can travel cheaply if you stay at the bright, funky Backpax Mitte Hostel like I did. It had fun decor with an artist’s rate, theme rooms, lounges and common areas. Baxpax Mitte Hostel Berlin also offers bike rentals, laundry, cooking, walking tours of the area, kind staff and an internet cafe. It was helpful to have a built in community because I don’t speak German. Safe travels!
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Author and Multimedia Personality Abiola Abrams, the Lifestyle Passionista, writes and makes TV and web series about living your best life.

1. Bebenoir.
2164 Frederick Douglass Boulevard Harlem, NY

bebenoir.com

Best Place to Buy A Dress No One Else Has On.

The Bebenoir boutique sells a mix of stylish women’s clothing, unique accessories and haute imported shoes to die for. They even have a selection of looks for men. Owners Fatima and Ibrahima Doukoure have brought to life their dream of beautiful and fun to wear African inspired clothing. Tell them about your event and Fatima will help you to pick out the perfect look. The best part? If you try on something that is not flattering Fatima will actually suggest something else. We love an honest retailer.

2. Renaissance Fine Art
2075 Adam Clayton Powell Jr. Boulevard Harlem, NY

therfagallery.com

Best Gallery to Learn About Art From Artists.

If you are an art collector or desire to be one there’s nothing like visiting the Renaissance Gallery. You’ll find powerful new works from emerging and established artists curated by Director Paula Coleman. This is an accessible community art gallery where questions and impromptu visits are encouraged. If you’re looking to buy you will definitely find something special in your price range; and chances are that upon request you can meet the artist as well. Showcasing artists from across the diaspora, the Renaissance Fine Art Gallery is a culturally significant experience.

3. Carol’s Daughter Back Room
24 West 125th Street Harlem, NY 10027

carolsdaughter.com

Best Place to Get Kissable Hands and Feet.

The Carol’s Daughter Back Room Hand and Foot Spa is a jewel box in the midst of the hustle and flow of Harlem’s fabled 125th Street. Owner Lisa Price outdid herself. The nurturing yet glam spa decor, incredible customer service, and nail artist’s attention to detail is unparalleled. The Carol’s Daughter Back Room is perfect for showers, Girl’s Afternoons Out, or solo spoiling. Give a gift certificate to someone you adore.

4. Uptown Juice Bar.
54 West 125th Street Harlem, NY

uptownjuicebarny.com

Best Place To Eat Tofu Without Realizing It.

This is not just any juice bar. In fact, I hesitated about including the Uptown Juice Bar on this list because the lines are long enough already. You can indulge in freshly made apple carrot juice for your health or meatless jerk “chicken” for your belly. We’ve spotted everyone here from your favorite PETA supporter to your favorite rapper. This vegan take out spot serves Guyanese, West Indian, and African American soul food favorites that even carnivores can enjoy. Fax in your order to skip the crazy line and be sure to have the pine tarts for desert. They’re almost as good as my mom’s recipe.

5. Hue-Man Bookstore & Cafe
2319 Frederick Douglass Boulevard Harlem, NY

huemanbookstore.com

Best Place to Mingle With Writers or Flirt with Intellectuals.

The past couple of years of recession coupled with the digital reading revolution have not been kind to bookstores. Thankfully the Hue-Man Bookstore in Harlem USA is still standing. Hue-Man is part book store, part culture center. As a new author this writer found the Hue Man to be incredibly supportive. Managing partner Marva Allen loves books, authors, readers and she loves Harlem. Please support this independent book store where intellectuals and celebrity authors come to share.

6. Citarella
461 West 125th Street Harlem, NY

citarella.com

Best Place for Gourmet Food Shopping.

If you want to express your inner foodie you’ll find all of the ingredients you need here. Citarella is the ultimate gourmet market. You’ll find specialized cheeses, olives, jams and herbs in addition to quality produce, a variety of oils, fish steaks and much more. Fresh food plus helpful service. Warning: Citarella is only for specialty items. You can shop Fresh Direct or your local supermarket for your standard staples.

7. The Winery
257 West 116th Street Harlem, NY

thewineryonline.com

Best Place to Find A Decent Wine Selection For Any Budget.

Harlem now has several wineries like Lenox Wines and Harlem Vintage but it’s not hard to see why The Winery bills itself as a “wine boutique.” Except for one never-smiling sourpuss the people behind the counter at The Winery are generally very helpful. Ask about their open wine education tastings and events. The Winery also delivers and they will document your purchases on their computer for future visits.

8. The Cloisters & Fort Tryon Park Gardens
99 Margaret Corbin Drive Washington Heights, NY

metmuseum.org/cloisters

Best Place for Romantic Moments.

I’m not into medieval art to put it mildly. However, a visit to Fort Tryon Park and The Cloisters is a must-have New York City experience. Yeah, yeah, we know that it’s far north but the Cloisters Museum and gardens are worth the hike. Of course there’s incredible architecture, ornate ceilings and those famous unicorn tapestries but Fort Tryon Park is truly the star with its wild flowers and Hudson River views. Bring someone cute to wander around with or take the free guided tour. You’ll feel lost in time.

9. Dwyer Cultural Center
258 Saint Nicholas Avenue Harlem, NY

dwyercc.org

Best Place to Learn Something While Being Entertained.

The multimedia, interactive Dwyer Cultural Center brings an explosion of culture with exciting public programs such as art exhibits, festivals, independent films, theater and dance. Check the website for schedules and head right over. There are events for children and adults. You won’t even realize that you’re learning something.

10. Dance Theater of Harlem
466 West 152nd Street Harlem, NY

dancetheaterofharlem.org

Best Place to Enhance Your Classical Dance Skills.

The motto for the esteemed Dance Theater of Harlem is “Transforming Lives Through Classical Dance.” If you ever get the opportunity to see a gravity defying, beautifully poetic Dance Theater of Harlem performance go for it. DTH is home to the best dancers in the world and guess what? Now you can become one of them. Well, you can at least learn a few moves in the same rooms. Open classes include the Adult Ballet Stretch and if you have a toddler sign up for Dance With Me, the inexpensive weekly dance class for you and your little one.

Honorable Mention:
The Faison Firehouse Theatre for cultural events curated by original For Colored Girls director George Faison.
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Author and Multimedia Personality Abiola Abrams, the Lifestyle Passionista, writes and makes TV and web series about living your best life.

Harlem Insider’s Nightlife Guide: Places To Party Uptown Style

Best Harlem Eats: Where To Indulge Your Taste Buds In Harlem

Get out of your own backyard. The world is yours. Claim it.

1. Gladys and Ron’s Chicken and Waffles

529 Peachtree Street NE Atlanta, GA

www.gladysandron.net

When I first heard the name Gladys and Ron’s Chicken and Waffles I assumed that this restaurant was owned by some retired married couple. Little did I know that I had really taken the Midnight Train to Georgia! The smothered chicken is insane. Heads up, they don’t serve alcohol but that’s OK because this is not nouvelle anything. Gladys and Ron’s is serious Southern Soul Food and I’m smuggling greens home in my bag back to Harlem. Bonus – there’s free parking behind the restaurant.

2. Spelman College Museum of Fine Art

350 Spelman Lane SW Atlanta, GA

www.spelman.edu

The Spelman College Museum of Fine Art is located in the Camille Olivia Hanks Cosby Academic Center. The museum is an academic resource but also a cultural excursion. Contributions are welcome but admission is free and open to the public. Parking is $3. Contrary to what you’d expect this gallery doesn’t always play if safe. Check their calendar for a range of edgy and thoughtful exhibitions.

3. B Chic Shoes

2591 Piedmont Road Atlanta GA

www.bchicshoes.com

The premiere episode of reality show The Real Housewives of Atlanta featured this shoetique’s owner Rashidah Ali with a trunk show at the Loews Hotel Atlanta. Remember when Nene confronted Dwight? Yes, we had to include something from those famous housewives. Rashidi Ali is a NYC shoe stylist who has hooked up everyone from Kim Kardashian to Wendy Williams, and B Chic Shoes is not just red soles.

4.Straits

793 Juniper St NE Atlanta, GA

www.straitsrestaurants.com

Confession: I had low expectations of Asian fusion restaurant Straits Atlanta when I learned that rapper-actor Ludacris is the owner. Generally rappers eateries tend to be very heavy on creating a scene and they often neglect food quality and customer service. I am pleased to announce that regarding Straits I was wrong. The food is amazing, the people are good looking and the service is adequate. Have a lychee martini and chillax.

5. Flip Burger Boutique

1587 Howell Mill Road Atlanta, GA

www.flipburgerboutique.com

The yummy Flip Burger Boutique is owned by Top Chef’s Richard Blais. Pick your heavenly poison with menu selections like the turkey burger, shrimp burger, gyro burger, chorizo burger and veggie burger just to start. Flip Burger feels a little like a nightclub or a really cool party. With good food, loud music and a gorgeous staff Flip Burger is all about fun. The milkshakes trump the cocktails. You can gain 10 pounds just walking by the front door!

6. Martin Luther King Jr. Center

450 Auburn Ave NE Atlanta, GA

www.thekingcenter.org

As a Northern “Yankee,” I can’t visit the south without paying homage to the struggle of the African American Civil Rights Movement. Similarly, I implore you, please don’t ever visit Atlanta without visiting the Martin Luther King Jr Center. You can’t know where you’re going unless you know where you came from. Nearby please also find Dr. King’s birthplace and the Ebenezer Baptist Church.

7. High Velocity

Atlanta Marriott Marquis 265 Peachtree Center Avenue Atlanta, GA

www.highvelocityatlanta.com

Every city needs a good sports bar, right? Especially an upscale sports bar with comfy leather recliners, huge projection screens and valet parking. If your game is on you have to check out High Velocity. And unlike most sports bars the food isn’t a throwaway. Score! Win-win.

8. Nagoya Japanese Seafood and Steakhouse

48 King Street Roswell, GA

Who says that you can’t find good sushi down south? Nagoya has a sushi bar and a wonderful hibachi style experience. The decor may not be as swank as other places but the chef seems to be having fun, the fresh seaood is absolutely perfect and so are the reasonable prices.

9. Strip Atlantic Station

245 18th Street Atlanta, GA

www.heretoserverestaurants.com

Strip Atlantic Station is Atlanta at its trendiest with fab s’mores brownies. The servers here are sweet and will probably remember your order if you come back. If you’re headed to the movie theater across the street then Strip will upgrade your movie night. Strip is also good late night spot. Well, as late night as Atlanta gets. Definitely head upstairs if you like to keep it lively. This is a fun spot for people watching.

10. King of Pops

1079 North Ave NE Atlanta, GA

kingofpops.net

The King of Pops is the Atlanta frozen yogurt and ice cream spot du jour. You’re never too old for popsicles. These pops are only $2.50 each which is expensive for frozen flavored water but cheap for gourmet bars with treats like crushed vanilla wafers, cheesecake and dark chocolate embedded within. Glad that they decided to include fro-yo. Special Note: The King of Pops can also be an ice cream-tastic casual dating experience.

Honorable Mentions: Atlanta nightlife confuses me. Some of the people running the hot spots often seem to be trying too hard. At any rate I wanted to include a couple of grown and sexy spots for folks who wanted the lounge experience without a booty shaking club night. Also check out Paschals Restaurant for high end soul food in a beautiful space; Whiskey Park located in the W Atlanta Midtown, and Aurum Lounge.

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Author and Multimedia Personality Abiola Abrams, the Lifestyle Passionista, writes and makes TV and web series about living your best life.

Harlem Insider’s Nightlife Guide: Places To Party Uptown Style

Best Harlem Eats: Where To Indulge Your Taste Buds In Harlem

1. Shrine

2271 Adam Clayton Powell Boulevard Harlem, NY

www.shrinenyc.com

Are you looking for great live music with no cover, an unpretentious crowd and dancing? Yes, please. Then Shrine is your spot. Shrine Bar and Restaurant accurately bills itself as a “World Music Venue.” At Shrine it’s not about the scene although there definitely is one. It’s all about the beats; from jazz and hip hop to reggae and Afro pop. Home of the Mafrika Music festival, the Shrine vibe is distinctly an homage to the motherland. Make your way through the party spilling onto the sidewalk, embrace the decor of tribal masks and record albums, get a drink from a cute bartender then get sweaty on the dance floor.

2. 67 Orange

2082 Frederick Douglass Boulevard Harlem, New York

www.67orangestreet.com

67 Orange was created specifically for those of us who have fantasized about being in an intimate speakeasy with beautiful people. That’s right! Harlem has its own sexy speakeasy. You can hide out and chat up someone special downstairs or hold court upstairs directly across from the bar. This is a small spot but get ready for the incredible mixed drinks like the Emancipation; with cucumber, cilantro and vodka. Bonus: The hot bartender or even owner Karl Franz will create a couture drink just for you. Warning: The place is staffed by incredibly gorgeous models. Try not to drool.

3. Lenox Lounge

288 Malcolm X Boulevard Harlem, New York

www.lenoxlounge.com

Want to kick it really, really old school? The Lenox Lounge provides an almost socialite free, hard core Harlem bar experience. Leave the ‘tude at home. This historic Harlem jazz club was founded in 1939 and has catered to greats from Miles Davis to Billie Holiday. James Baldwin and Langston Hughes dropped by to grab a stiff drink. Why wouldn’t you?

4. Nectar Wine Bar

2235 Frederick Douglass Blvd Harlem, NY

www.nectarwinenyc.com

Cozy and modern, Nectar is a sweet place for romance. Yes, you can bring your sweetie to this wine and cheese bar with mod decor. Strangely, the sometimes snobby staff at Nectar doesn’t greet its fabulous young patrons when they walk in or sit down reminding us of the days when uptown nightlife was all about bad customer service. Nonetheless Nectar made our hot bar list because the hummus and wrapped dates are simply heavenly. Mmmm.

5. Milk Lounge

2056 Second Avenue East Harlem, NY

www.milklounge.com

The “Spanish Harlem Salsa Nights” may bring you to Milk Bar but you will keep coming back for the two floor raucous fiesta that often has free mojitos. Sometimes there’s a band, at other times there’s a DJ, but there’s always a party with genuine Latin music and a down home crowd. This super fun hot spot is a part of chic eatery Chimney BBQ.

6. Mobay’s

17 West 125th Street Harlem, NY

www.mobayuptownnyc.com

If you feel like hanging out right on fabled 125th Street then mosey over to Mobay’s. Loud live music, Denzel Washington sightings, incredible Caribbean and American soul fusion food and a party atmosphere. Even if you’re just parking at the bar you must have the corn bread. Make sure someone’s mama is not sitting next to you because you’ll want to slap her after you eat it!

7. Five and Diamond

2072 Frederick Douglass Blvd Harlem, NY

The 5 and Diamond servers have often been called the friendliest staff in Harlem. Add to that a well-appointed restaurant, fulfilling bar, upscale crowd and a $5 tapas bar menu. The desert donuts are divine. Yes, it’s cool to hang out here but you must have a meal. The menu was made with love. Time to get the party started!

8. Camaradas El Barrio

2241 First Ave East Harlem, NY

www.camaradaselbarrio.com

Camaradas in El Barrio is always a good time. It’s all about the thumping dance music in this cash only East Harlem spot that sells no hard liquor. Don’t despair. There’s a complete selection of wine and beer. Check out the yummy Sangria, house band, and cool staff. Give them a ring to get the scoop on the fun Camaradas event nights, like spoken word and comedy.

9. Moca & Chocolat

2210 Frederick Douglass Boulevard Harlem, NY

www.mocalounge.com

Good ole Moca. Moca Bar and Lounge is an old standby of “new” Harlem. Yeah, yeah, it’s definitely not the bright, shiny new kid on the block but Moca is still a good place to chilllax in the cut with your friends. This is a late night spot where you can sit on a comfy sofa and nosh on delicious bar food under the radar. The servers are dedicated and an added bonus- everyone looks good in candlelight. Visit once and they will know your name. You can bounce back and forth between Moca and sexy new Chocolat which is slightly across the street. Warning, when the party gets thick Moca breaks out the plastic wine glasses but we don’t list Chocolat on its own because it’s still finding its legs.

10. Harlem Lanes

2116 Seventh Avenue Harlem, NY

www.harlemlanes.com

Yes, Harlem Lanes is a bowling alley but stay with us, party people. There are different kinds of nightlife experiences. If you want to try something out of the box like inexpensive, sexy bowling with a DJ who takes requests plus a calm, easy going crowd then Harlem Lanes is your spot. This is a fun place for a theme party with the most dedicated staff. Everyone else should come here to learn customer service. Go for the glow-in-the-dark lanes and plush couches or chill in the bar and lounge areas.

Author and Multimedia Personality Abiola Abrams, the Lifestyle Passionista, writes and makes TV and web series about living your best life at AbiolaTV.com.

Best Harlem Eats: Where To Indulge Your Taste Buds In Harlem

3 Easy Ways To Drop 5 Pounds Before Thanksgiving

Oh- and forget what you thought you knew about Northern Manhattan cuisine. Harlem is not just soul food anymore. You can enjoy sweet potatoes and corn bread on Monday and Senegalese thiebu djeun on Tuesday without ever dipping below 96th Street.

So what should you eat in Harlem? It depends on what you’re in the mood for because now we have a meal for almost every palate. This is not a list about flash or big named egos. We want you to have the best time. This list is about you getting the most incredible food and service for your precious bucks.

TOP RESTAURANTS: 10 MUST HAVE HARLEM DINING EXPERIENCES

1. Londel’s

2620 Frederick Douglass Boulevard Harlem, NY

www.londelsrestaurant.com

Harlemites consider Londel’s the real home of chicken and waffles. We couldn’t fill this list with glitzy hot spots without paying homage to our grandpa’s favorite players. Londel’s is an uptown gem. See if the owner is around and allow the O.G. (Original Gentry) Mr. Londel to bend your ear with way-back-when tales of how he’s fed all of the greats. The band alone is worth the trip. Sit outside if the weather allows and indulge in the fresh collard greens. This is an old school Harlem restaurant that has never faltered on food or service, and for this we are so grateful.

2. Mojo

185 St. Nicholas Avenue Harlem, NY

www.mojo-harlem.com

You know that person you’re trying hard to impress? Hip and red hot, Mojo is the secret key in your back pocket. Here’s the caveat: please don’t come to this tiny and chic restaurant if you’re in a hurry. You can enjoy the splendid decor and music as you wait (and wait) for the mouth watering Mediterranean-inspired food. The well dressed upscale Mojo’s crowd (of all ages) is too confident and accomplished to put on pretentious airs. Have the chicken fritters and asparagus as the live music gets you in the mood for whatever the evening brings. The gorgeous stained glass picture window panels open in the summer as patrons lose it over the sexy grits.

3. Zoma: Essence of Abyssinia

2084 Frederick Douglas Boulevard Harlem, NY

www.zomanyc.com

Any list of where to go in Harlem that does not include the contributions of the newer direct from African residents is incomplete. Zoma is Ethiopian cuisine at its finest. The cinnamon, nutmeg, basil, coriander, cloves and thyme dance with your tongue in every dish. Don’t even get us started on the honey wine and sambusas. I really thought that I didn’t like Ethiopian food until I came to Zoma. Ease yourself into the sour bread and you will be back.

4. Billie’s Black

271 West 119th Street Harlem, NY

www.billiesblack.com

The owner Adrienne is an absolute sweetheart in this gay friendly Harlem soul food spot. The mac and cheese will be the best you’ve ever eaten and although we know that fried foods are not the healthiest way to go, take a diet day off to visit Billie’s Black. If you find the lights a little too bright for a romantic experience then speak to the staff and they’ll make the adjustment. They are incredibly accommodating; and unlike other spots in the area the Billie’s Black staff acts as if they appreciate your business. We’ve never had a bad experience at Billie’s Black. A great spot for people watching.

5. Miss Mamie’s Spoonbread Too

366 West 110th Street Harlem, NY

www.spoonbreadinc.com

What are you doing for Sunday brunch? Don’t let all of the Columbia University students have all of the fun! When you visit Miss Mamie’s or her uptown sister Miss Maude’s you are not there for the ambiance. You are there for the authentic southern African American soul food and the soul food alone. They cater to everyone from former presidents to church ladies. And you know that the church ladies know soul food. Pass the corn bread and be sure to check out owner Norma Darden’s genuine family memorabilia on the walls. Preach.

6.Lolita’s

57 Lenox Avenue Harlem, NY

www.lolitasmexicanrestaurantnyc.com

Lolitas Restaurant! Where to begin? This is the best Mexican food we’ve eaten outside of Mexico. Throw on your jeans and head right over. This is where you go when you are hungry for fresh south of the border fare that will literally dance on your tongue. If weather permits sit outside while the kind and generous Lolita’s team caters to your every need. Lolita’s chicken nachos have made it impossible for me to enjoy this appetizer anywhere else. Yum.

7. Melba’s

300 West 114th Street Harlem, NY 10026

www.melbasrestaurant.com

If you’re hanging with your friends, on a date or treating your family then this lovely eatery has something tasty to offer. Head to Melba’s and the smiling owner herself may greet you at your table. Don’t be surprised if you get into a convo with the folks sitting nearby. Melba’s always feels like home. Whether you’re there for Sunday brunch and mimosas or fresh fish and specialty cocktails on Friday the food is always a wonderful. In fact the soft biscuits and strawberry butter should be illegal. Find Melba’s on Frederick Douglass Boulevard along what the New York Times has called Restaurant Row Harlem.

8. Chez Lucienne

308 Lenox Avenue Harlem, NY

www.chezlucienne.com

Francophiles, here’s your classic French bistro in Harlem. If you already love French food or want to get to know coq au vin and mussels in white wine then please discover Chez Lucienne. The crowd is a little touristy sometimes but if you’re headed over to their famous soul food neighbor please stop in here first. Live jazz band every Friday and Saturday night. And in the most surprising twist of all, Chez Lucienne is easy on the wallet.

9. Gospel Uptown

2110 Adam Clayton Powell Jr. Boulevard Harlem, NY

www.gospeluptown.com

Gospel Uptown describes its menu as “Healthful Soul Fusion” and multi ethnic nouvelle cuisine. This is one of the biggest spots in Harlem, perfect for a church group or sorority meet up. The owners see themselves as a gospel version of a Hard Rock Cafe. We don’t know about that but the food is decent. Most soul food spots ignore vegetarians — not Gospel Uptown. Check it out.

10. Red Rooster

310 Lenox Avenue Harlem, NY

www.redroosterharlem.com

Harlem foodies are on Red Rooster watch. Top Chef Master’s Marcus Samuelsson is currently staffing up for his eagerly anticipated new Harlem restaurant. The Wall Street Journal calls the celebrity chef’s future hot spot one of 15 new restaurants to watch this fall in NYC. Word is that Marcus Samuelsson’s Red Rooster is slated to open by November 1st. Fingers crossed. Whenever it opens we’ll see you there. All “elevated American comfort food” entrees will be under $25. He has cooked for the Obama’s and now Chef Marcus Samuelsson can cook for you. As he said in the WSJ, “It’s a milestone for us and it’s not going to be rushed by anything else. When the restaurant is ready, the restaurant is ready.”

Bonus. Patsy’s Pizzeria, Restaurant & Bar

2287 First Avenue East Harlem, NY

www.patsyspizzeriany.com

World famous Patsy’s Pizzeria is a strong candidate for the best pizza in NYC. Although you may not think of pizza when you think of Harlem, Harlemites want access to the full range of foods. Why should we have less choices than any other neighborhood? Paty’s serves real Italian pizza that satisfies even the most gourmet palate. Add the juicy tomatoes, fresh mozerella, goat cheese and plump black olives. Leave your glad rags at home and pick up an addictive Patsy’s pie.

Honorable Mentions: Uptown Juice Bar for vegan Caribbean food, Patisserie Des Ambassades for the Senegalese dining experience and Native, mostly for the sidewalk seating. You can also find great food at several spots on our Harlem Nightlife Hot Spot List: Shrine, 67 Orange, Lenox Lounge, Nectar Wine Bar, Milk Lounge, Mobay’s, 5 and Diamond, Camaradas, and Chocolat.

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Author and Multimedia Personality Abiola Abrams, the Lifestyle Passionista, writes and makes TV and web series about living your best life at AbiolaTV.com.

3 Easy Ways To Drop 5 Pounds Before Thanksgiving

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Lifestyle Artists Mr. & Mr. are changing the ways that we think about recycled materials by using them in cutting edge artistic pieces including haute couture wearable art. Abiola Abrams interviews artist Christopher Trujillo about their latest show at the Renaissance Fine Art Gallery in Harlem. Here’s what’s next… The haute couture Origami Jacket that I am wearing was designed by the other half of Mr. & Mr., Michael Jerome.

Watch!

Save the Date! Special LIVE Abiola on LSD: Love, Sex, Dating & Drama broadcast interview with ZANE and virtual book release party for the Queen of Erotica on Shovio.com on Saturday August 21st from 7:30-10pm EST. More info on the Lifestyle Love, Sex, Dating blog. See you on Twitter and Facebook. If you’re wondering about my Wearable Art Origami Jacket, here’s more.

Jessica Holter, the founder of The Punany Poets, is no stranger to controversy. From her appearance on HBO’s Real Sex to her steamy new erotic novel The Punany Experience: The War Between Tops and Bottoms, Ms. Holter has been making a sexy stir all in the name of entertainment, poetry and safe sex.

When I interviewed Jessica Holter about her spicy new book, published by Zane’s Strebor Simon and Schuster imprint, she even shared some sexual secrets.

Watch!

Video: Kiss & Tell TV Interview with Jessica Holter of The Punany Poets, produced by iCreateTV. The hot new book is named The Punany Experience: The War Between Tops and Bottoms.

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From the Publisher

About Jessica Holter’s new erotic book, ZANE presents The Punany Experience:

* Take an unhappy husband with a spoiled and suspicious horny wife, plus an androgynous soft-butch businesswoman with a knack for inflicting pain, an executive assistant with a dog collar and no shame, then add a passive-aggressive pillow princess named to the scene and you have just started a war! The Punany Experience is definitely not your average down low story.

* Meet Stormy Talbert, a sexy bisexual, and Korea Smith, an androgynous businesswoman, lovers who begin an affair with Hartford, a married man. He’s not on the down low, just a little curious after his first prostate exam, and the dominant Korea is anxious to help him find the answers he seeks. But in the trenches of the war between the sexes, she just may discover that what is between her legs is the biggest surprise of all.

About Writer / Performer Jessica Holter
Founder of The Punany Poets, Jessica Holter, Ghetto Girl Blue, is a mother, an author, a gifted orator, a talented visual artist and an activist for AIDS awareness and sexual abuse recovery. She created The Punany Poets in 1995 after the untimely death of Eric “Eazy-E” Wright of AIDS. Her theater group, The Punany Poets, has appeared on HBO’s Real Sex, Black Entertainment Television, Playboy TV, London’s Channel 5 and Cinemax. Holter’s sexy stories on in rotation on Playboy Radio (XM) and she has self published six books. Best-selling Author/Publisher Zane compiled her most riveting poetic works into a hardback anthology, Verbal Penetration in 2007.

The Punany Experience is Holter’s first novel from Strebor Books. Holter continues to tour the country in live stage plays and cabaret performances. Jessica Holter actively promotes AIDS awareness and female empowerment though her growing line of public service advertisements, print media, audio/radio, video and film and novelties.

Find more Jessica Holter at Punany Poets Official, and on Twitter @GhettoGirlBlue.

Buy ZANE presents The Punany Experience by Jessica Holter wherever you buy books.

Save the Date! Special LIVE Abiola on LSD: Love, Sex, Dating & Drama broadcast interview with ZANE and virtual book release party for the Queen of Erotica on Shovio.com on Saturday August 21st from 7:30-10pm EST. More info on the Lifestyle Passionista Kiss & Tell blog. See you on Twitter and Facebook. If you’re wondering about my Wearable Art Origami Jacket, here’s more.

Macy Gray, she of the madness and mad talent, is BACK . Does she hit or miss? Check it out…

The fabulous Macy Gray is back with a high fashion look and a new sound. We loved this new album named The Sellout and hope you will too. Check it out — Macy Gray’s thoughts on The Sellout in an exclusive EPK — video after the jump!

Watch the video below: Macy Gray opens up about her new album and the personal growths throughout the making of “The Sellout.”

Macy Gray‘s new album The Sellout is hot! Check it out. Go Macy!!

VIDEO: Macy Gray’s “Beauty In The World”

What do you think? Let’s chat about it in the comments on Twitter or Facebook.

VIDEO: Macy Gray Talks Sexy Men and Ex Boyfriends

And you know where to find me: my new weekly show “Abiola on LSD: Love, Sex, Dating and Drama,” following Star and Bucwild on Shovio, monthly at “Abiola’s Kiss and Tell Live Revue” at Madame X, daily on AbiolaTV.com, and of course buy Dare by Abiola Abrams wherever you buy books.

Hey Rockstars,

Here’s How to Win Ms. Badu’s Jewelry!

IT’S EASY.

• I am picking TWO (2) LUCKY WINNERS from comments here, on my Twitter, or Facebook to win this Erykah Badu exclusive. Just leave a comment, facebook or tweet me — and you’re entered to win ONE (1) wooden ankh CUSTOM necklace.
• Join Hourglas39 who recently won a giveaway from Whitney Houston, PirateX who won the entire Sade catalog and our lip gloss winner…
• Void where prohibited, must be 18 to win and within the 50 United States.
• Winners will also be posted on AbiolaTV.com.

And Guess what?!

The light wood custom Ankh measures slightly over 2 inches with a 30 inch long dark wood beaded chain. Only 50 custom Erykah Badu Ankhs were created for special online giveaways and will not be available for retail sale.

Here’s the Official Info:

A special venture to commemorate the release of Erykah Badu’s new album New Amerykah Part 2: Return of the Ankh. Fans will win a custom “Erykah Badu Ankh” jewelry piece (as seen in above image) designed exclusively by the masterminds of GoodWoodNYC.
GoodWoodNYC specializes in custom rings, pendants, necklaces, bracelets, pins and earrings. They utilize a variety of exotic woods including, Zebrawood, Bloodwood, Lacewood, Purple heart and Birch. All GoodWoodNYC designs are hand sanded, painted and lasered by designer and founder Kerri O’Connell along with a team of wood carving elves. For more information please visit: http://goodwoodnyc.com/

Do you have friends with benefits? Are you two consenting adults or are you just playing yourself? Let’s talk sex buddies and relationships…

On this episode of Abiola’s Kiss and Tell TV we are talking about FWB relationships. What do you think?

WATCH!

Leave a comment or shout me out on Twitter, Youtube or Facebook. You can also come hang with me in NYC every month at Abiola’s Kiss & Tell Live reading series at Madame X or buy my novel Dare by Abiola Abrams wherever you buy books.

While some are still kvetching about whether successful black women can or can’t find a man, some like filmmaker Lamar Tyler and his wife Ronnie Tyler are taking positive steps to tell other stories.

After Nightline, check out these clips of African American men and women talking about the power and beauty of marriage, and the work it takes to be successful in love. You Saved Me…

The popular blog BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com is only the first step that Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are taking to role model healthy love and promote positive images and stories about marriage. Their beautiful new film You Saved Me is headed to Atlanta next. Find the schedule here or order You Saved Me on Amazon. Great work, Lamar and Ronnie!

About You Saved Me:

With African American marriage numbers at an all time low and African American divorce numbers at an all time high the hopes of positive, lasting, relationships look bleak until now. Executive Producers Lamar and Ronnie Tyler bring real married couples to the screen to chronicle the greatest love stories ever told.

These real couples explain how their marriages had a direct impact on their lives. Featuring candid and transparent looks inside of the hardships, trials, and ultimate success stories of these amazing couples, YOU SAVED ME offers an unprecedented look inside of real relationships and what is required to sustain them.

What do you think? Get in touch at AbiolaTV.com or hit me on Twitter, facebook, YouTube or Examiner. Of course buy the novel Dare by Abiola Abrams wherever you buy books.

There’s been a lot of talk recently about men, power and monogamy in the wake of the Tiger Woods and Sandra Bullock sex and cheating scandals. Critics of marriage say that if Tiger Woods or Jesse James were in more honest Open Marriages, then they wouldn’t have had this problem.

Never one to let a question go unanswered your girl Abiola Abrams of Kiss & Tell TV hit the road in Woodstock, NY to find out “What are people thinking about open marriages?” Marriage, sex… dating?

Polyamory? Polygamy? Open Marriages? Open Relationships? Is this for you?

WATCH.

Are open relationships for you>?

Hit me up on Twitter @abiolatv, Youtube, Facebook @xoabiola, AbiolaTV.com and of course, buy the novel DARE by Abiola Abrams wherever you buy books.

Why can’t successful single black women find a man? Come  on. Are we still singing this same old song. Nightline, please!

I thought that we left this in the 00′s. Especially when statistics show that 44% of black men are never married vs. 42% of black women. The official Miss Picky says every man and woman regardless of race deserves not to settle. Love is supposed to be fun. Let’s talk…

——-

Megan Carpentier at Jezebel.com asked me to weigh in on this topic. Here’s the definitive single black women article featuring the brilliant Twanna Hines, Latoya Peterson, Sister Toldjah along with Abiola Abrams (me). And here’s my full article.

Today’s Kiss and Tell Report.

Sixth grade was my last year in coed education. After that my parents and I made the genius decision that I would enter a snooty all girls prep school for the remainder of my adolescence. Seemed like a good idea at the time but that’s a different article. And by article I mean therapy session.

I had a wise-cracking wizened old teacher, let’s call him Mr. Goldstein, who used his ‘I’m one of you’ schtick and stale jokes to push us. Goldstein actually managed to be amusing and relevant despite his advanced age. He was ancient. Like 30 years old at least. Anyway, in a stroke of teaching brilliance Mr. Goldstein turned our weekly quizzes into contests. The top 10 students in the class would to attend a fun-filled after school pizza party.

This was a huge friggin’ tween deal because it meant we girls had 4 opportunities a month to hang out with boys without being chased, hit, or wielding a joystick. What kind of joystick you manipulated depended on how ‘fast’ you were.

Being the reigning queen of the geeks and an over-achieving suck up meant that I was on the inside track to attend every pizza party. Luckily big butts were in style in my ‘hood. With some cajoling maybe we could even get Goldstein to play New Edition or Salt N Pepa. What better way was there to have your own personal Theo Huxtable jammin’ on the one?

The first few times that Goldstein dangled his pizza party carrot the top 9 kids out of 10 who qualified for the after school jam were girls. We had fun together and enjoyed our extra cheese but really missed the boys. Now that I think back, a big part of the boys not doing as well probably had to do with the uncoolness factor in urban schools surrounding achievement. For the other issues surrounding young black boys and learnin’ check out educator Jawanza Kunjufu.

But after 3 weeks of pizza parties that looked more like an episode of The Facts of Life than the hot gooey pizza filled co-ed Breakfast Club orgy my raging hormones craved it was clear that the girls were ‘winning.’ Something had to change.

What did Mr. Goldstein do at that point? Did he yell at the girls for overachieving? Berate us for being so accomplished? Tell us to aim lower and not leave our peers in the dust? Remove the standards to allow the boys their opportunity at high cholesterol and heartburn? Or tell us girls that we were stupid and desperate young bitches destined to die alone for even wanting to share the soiree with boys?

No. Mr. Goldstein challenged the 6th grade boys to step up to the plate and be men. He chastised the underachievers. He lectured them and offered them after school tutoring. He encouraged us girls to share photos and stories of our pizza party high life to tempt the dudes to get it together. And step up they did. Eventually the pizza party winners were almost 50/50.

Why am I sharing this now? A deep longing for ghetto Queens pizza? Well, yeah. But also it’s been reported that Nightline is once again tackling that poignant 00s question, “Why Can’t a Successful Black Woman Find a Man?”

Chris Ariens at MediaBistro reports that: Nightline’s Vicki Mabrey and talk show host Steve Harvey moderated a “Face-Off” debate between Sherri Shepherd, Jacque Reid, Hill Harper, and Jimi Izrael for an upcoming episode. [Video: My Interview with Hill Harper about black people and love] Pardon me while I lean out of my Harlem window to hurl on the last junkie left in the alley.

Haven’t we pummeled this horse to death already? Or at least put it out to pasture in The Washington Post, Essence Magazine, Ebony on The View, Oprah, and yes, Nightline. I haven’t had this many people in my bedroom since college. But that too is another therapy session.

For those of you new to this single black woman “debate” here’s what usually happens in these episodes: The host rallies off statistics like, “If you are a black woman with a degree you have a better chance of being one of Tiger Woods’ mistresses than getting married.” They then throw up graphs to show the percentages of black men who don’t graduate high school, who are in jail or gay, the rest who choose to date interracially. They highlight the fact that black women are least likely to date across racial lines.

At this point in the program several high achieving, successful women are shown with all of the degrees, hair relaxers, dreadlocks, Loubatin shoes and designer accoutrement that can fill the screen and asked what they look for in a man. Then like any other human being on the planet the women simply state what qualities they seek in a mate.

For example on my fame-whoring gig on the Drew Barrymore-produced “reality” series VH1′s Tough Love my list was: Single black female seeking a man that I am attracted to, who is kind, smart, gainfully employed, spiritual, funny, community-minded and available. For that my character was dubbed Miss Picky. Really? Are there people out there seeking someone unkind, not smart, unemployed, and unavailable? Methinks not.

So if a man is not interested “he’s just not that into you” but if you are not interested you’re too picky or something is wrong with you. Got it. Here’s the thing- all of us – even those in arranged marriages have a concept of what we seek in a partner. We may or may not physically list it out but the list is there. Do what works for you.

Obviously the great 6th grade pizza experiment wasn’t a clean test kitchen of the full psycho-socio-economic issues facing black men and women in America. But WHY are women being berated for wanting to date people that they like and have things in common with. This is absurd.

Why isn’t anyone addressing the men?

I think that most of us, even some Republicans, will agree that we are all created equal. People are interested in dating and marrying people who have the same interests they do. People tend to meet people primarily through work or in their social circle. Anyone can find just any man or any woman. What I hear from my friends – male and female – of all races is that they are seeking people they find right for THEM.

The insane thing is that this conversation has taken on a vicious black woman-hating tone– much of it from other people of color including black women and men. [Video: The Reason Black Men Jump Ship] This strain of the argument goes, “Black women are all nasty bitches so black men don’t want them.”

As a certified platinum certificate holder on nasty bitchiness with best friends of both the Becky and Keshia persuasion I can tell you that nastiness comes in every race, creed and gender. [Video: Black Men Seek White Women Because Black Women Are Too Angry]

Another strain of the conversation says that these women are caught up in the fairytale and want some unrealistic version of the prince. And men are exempt from fairytale ideals? Ever seen a barbershop wall? Or whom men cast to play their love interests in movies and music videos? How about whom wealthy men (including athletes and the like) with the largest dating pool choose to pursue?

Here’s the real deal– we are all seeking our Kings and Queens. That’s why Larry King is on his 8th divorce. As for being sold a fairytale we forget that men are taught the same fairytales that women are, and they too buy in to whatever their culture reinforces. For some that fairytale may be that the man should be a prince; for others that fairytale says that the man should be a pimp.

Enough of reinforcing this “no good men” prophesy. My father and brother are amazing black men so clearly this mystical white whale exists. Marriage numbers are down across the board because many women (gasp) don’t want to be married. Many people are living paperless with their life partners. They don’t register in these stats. As for the swirl, I too also used to feel like I only wanted to marry a black man but I’ve since grown to realize that I am seeking commonalities and attraction. Duh. [AbiolaTV Throwback Videos: Still Taboo and Black Women & Interracial Dating]

It’s an amazing time to be a black woman. You have Tyler Perry and Steve Harvey to give you relationship advice, Chris Rock to offer commentary on your hair, and Bishop TD Jakes to resolve your salvation. And Nightline to make it all make sense for you. Goddess bless America. (And a special inside shame on you my corporate TV partners for changing my Goddess references to Princess to make me “more accessible.” You know who you are.)

I have much more to say but I am way over my word count. Apologies. I am West Indian and prone to excess. Find me at AbiolaTV.com on Twitter @AbiolaTV or Facebook at xoAbiola to continue the conversation.

—————–

Dating and Children? Whether you are a single parent or a single person dating people with children, there is one important question in the room: When is the right time to meet or introduce the kids?

On this episode of Abiola’s Kiss & Tell TV, Abiola Abrams investigates. Watch — then let’s talk about it.

Today’s Kiss and Tell Report.

The Sandra Bullock and Jesse James pending divorce has people thinking about blended families. For single people there can be anxiety around when to meet a new partner’s children. And with the increase in single parents, those newly dating mothers and fathers are seeking the right moment to introduce their kids to a new boyfriend or girlfriend. Is there a right moment to introduce the kids?

In true Abiola’s Kiss and Tell TV fashion, we went to the beach in California to investigate– and even found relaxing moments at a Venice Beach Oxygen Bar on the way.

Let’s talk about it on Twitter @AbiolaTV, Facebook.com/xoAbiola, AbiolaTV.com or LIVE in NYC on April 20th at Abiola’s Kiss & Tell LIVE reading and performance series.

8 dating turnoffs that men do

3 signs you could be dating someone dangerous

Hot New Video with Abiola & The Condom Kings! Talking about wearing condoms with your lover.

Today’s Kiss and Tell Report.

Recently I dropped by The Museum of Sex in New York City to check out the Rubbers Condom Exhibit. It seemed like the perfect place to address the My Boyfriend or Husband Doesn’t Like To Wear Condoms issue. Check out the Abiola’s Kiss & Tell TV video episode below!

What do you think?

Tiger Woods and his apology have been covered to death. Yeah, we know it’s nobody’s business but his family’s and his sponsors’ but YOU clicked here for a reason, right?

I couldn’t help wondering what those who make sex their business had to say about Tiger Woods so I spoke to Porn Stars like Mr. Marcus, Bestselling Authors Deborah Gregory, Terrance Dean and Maryann Reid, Relationship Gurus such as Kim Hess, Feminist Scholars like Mireille Miller-Young and Sex Bloggers including Twanna Hines and Shoshi. Check it out!

Tiger Woods apology video and reactions

What do the top players who make love, sex and intimate relations their business think of Tiger Woods– if they think of him at all? The range of responses from these bestselling authors, popular filmmakers, top bloggers, scholars and porn stars is diverse, fun food for thought, compelling and for me at least include the definitive statements on the Tiger Woods adultery drama.

Here’s what the smartest and most notorious Sex and Relationship Writers, Scholars and Performers have to say about Tiger Woods’ apology statement and his numerous affairs:

Tiger Woods – ‘Sex and Relationships’ Community Reacts
“Tiger’s apology is business as usual, I think his robotic monotone delivery is appropriate for the rubbernecking masses. Nothing to see here we haven’t seen before.”

“I think its some funny shit. Can’t wait to see what Saturday Night live does with it. It looks like a SNL skit.”

Mr. Marcus

Adult Performer
mrmarcus.com

“I think what we need to get clear about is that Tiger Woods’ extensive, and ultimately destructive infidelity has less to do with so called “sex addiction” than it does with the long held attitude of entitlement that has permeated our culture for time immemorial. Men of success and privilege have always considered it their right to take mistresses and have affairs while their good wives stay home with the children and look the other way. The only difference now is that women are no longer willing to play along.”
Candida Royalle
Author, Entrepreneur & Erotic Filmmaker
candidaroyalle.com

“I don’t really understand what he’s apologizing for. Maybe he’s apologizing to his sponsors. Lots of people have affairs.”
Stephen Elliott
Bestselling Author, The Adderall Diaries
stephenelliott.com

“On one level, I don’t think it’s anyone’s business what Tiger Woods did or does in terms of his sex life, and the public apology seems slightly misplaced; does he truly owe the public an apology or does that belong to his family? I think it’s an exaggeration to say it cause “pain” to his fans, and maybe it’s time to question what we expect of our leaders, especially since Woods isn’t a politician. The apology appear both heartfelt as well as an media ploy to try to save his future career and popularity. However, like Bill Clinton, whose public apology his statement is being linked to, I think his sexual behavior is a sign that something was amiss in his life, as evidenced by the gap between having a yacht named Privacy and being indiscreet about his ongoing affairs.“
Rachel Kramer Bussel

Best Sex Writing series editor

rachelkramerbussel.com

“How dare Tiger Woods take up valuable airwaves with a press conference about …. Himself! Infidelity is narcissistic. Infidelity inflicts ripples of pain across families and communities. And that’s not sexy: It is abuse. Honesty and consent is what’s hot. So be a slut and have a good time. But be an ethical slut. And Tiger? Shush.”
Shira Tarrant, PhD

Author and Professor

shiratarrant.com
“Some silly woman out there really hoped her husband was listening to Tiger’s apology, but this just showed men how to do it a lot better. Tiger’s apology was written by a woman and he sounded like one. Tiger, man up and show more independence.”
Maryann Reid
Bestselling Author and Editor
alphanista.com

“If PERSON A cheats on PERSON B with PERSON C, it’s really no one’s business except the parties involved. Tiger is neither my father, lover, husband nor an acquaintance. Right now, I wouldn’t necessarily want to be in Elin Nordegren’s shoes. That said, I’m uninterested in her & her husbands’ personal affairs. In fact, I think the fascination with love lives of the rich & famous says more about our country’s penchant for gawking than it does about our spry young Tiger’s alleged ability to wear women out.”
Twanna A Hines,
Sex, Dating and Relationships Writer
funkybrownchick.com

Eyal Feldman

Boy Butter Personal Lubricant Inventor, Entrepreneur

“While the whole Tiger Woods scandal has been entertaining as hell, it is not about sex but about love. Woods does not love himself,so how can we truly love someone else? Hopefully he is on the road to finding love of self.”

Yolanda Shoshana

Luscious Lifestyle Diva

lusciouslifestylediva.com

“I’m disappointed that Tiger Woods apologized publicly for his rampant infidelities. He doesn’t  owe his fans anything other than to show up with his A-game on the green. Now what he owes his wife? That’s another story.”

Demetria Lucas

Author

abelleInbrooklyn.com

“According to the written speech, he’s deeply sorry for his selfish and irresponsible behavior. He’s not as good at reading as he is at golf. He did better than Chris Brown did, at least.  Good Luck to him.. Had he not been married, none of this would have happened and he wouldn’t be considered a sex addict. Period.”

Bill Cammack

DatingGenius

billcammack.com

“I care so little about Tiger Woods and his sex life, this is the most I’ve written on it ever. There are so many others doing a fine job of unpacking his love life, that I can happily focus on other things. I just don’t care about consenting adults doing what they want to do. The fact that a rich celebrity superstar had sex with someone other than his wife is the most banal thing I can imagine. It’s constant…with only the names changing from week to week. I did crack up when I saw his ‘gangsta’ Vanity Fair cover.”

Therese Shechter

Filmmaker and Writer

theamericanvirgin.blogspot.com

“Tiger Woods has no reason to apologize to anyone but Elin…no one was harmed by him sleeping with a bazillion women but wifey. Shame on Tiger’s PR team for making him do it. Until the world has an agreement with Tiger that he won’t sleep with anyone but them, no public apology needed.“
Kim Hess

Divorce Guru
kimhess.com

“Tiger Woods’ sex life is NONE OF OUR BUSINESS! Let that man, his wife, and his family work out their PERSONAL problems, in private. A public persona does not give the public the right to invade anyone’s privacy. It ain’t my busy. It ain’t yours! Anytime spent on the Tiger Woods “scandal” is time taken from our own lives and families. There’s no upside to such preoccupation.  He’s a role model athletic excellence. That’s it!”
Mo Beasley

Performance Artist, Author, Educator

www.mobeasley.com

“Tiger’s a Tool. I was working in the other room as I heard Tiger’s apology today, but that didn’t stop me from yelling at the TV, “You Freakin’ wussy…” and “Oh… lets see how long that lasts!” What are Tiger’s tears for? I believe for the loss of career, family, and sheer humiliation, but I don’t believe he is repentant in his soul. Tiger is a child that doesn’t have enough of an identity to do the right thing for his own sake, rather than do the right thing for others. That is why, he is doomed to repeat this, wait and see.”
Mike Masters
Master Dater
mikethemasterdater.com

“I think the kinky among us are more bemused at the Tiger Woods situation than shocked. There is so much flexibility in how we live our lives sexually that the “Average Pervert’s” first thought is “Well, why didn‘t he just negotiate a more open relationship?” Many people live poly(amorous) lifestyles… more than you might think. As a viable option, that could have have made this situation a moot point.”
Mollena Williams
Ms. San Francisco Leather 2009 and ThePerverted Negresss

mollena.com

“I never gave Tiger Woods a second thought before any of this and probably won’t once it all washes over. From personal experience and my own family background I can tell you that the most loving, supportive and beautiful people cheat and have affairs outside of their marriages. However, Tiger Woods, from all accounts, was neither loving, supportive or beautiful. I don’t  know Tiger Woods, his wife Elin or anyone directly related to this sex scandal but perhaps we are so fascinated as a country only as a diversion from our own issues. The only thing that astounds me as these stories break and as a sex and relationships celebrity columnist who has the dubious pleasure of reporting them, is that we continue to be surprised. Perhaps instead we should reevaluate our definitions of the exclusive club of marriage.”

Abiola Abrams

Author, Media Personality, Filmmaker

abiolatv.com

“He who is without sin, cast the first stone. Better yet, get a life of your OWN. I’m sick & tired of all these sinners judging him.  Judge yourself.  -SINGLE HUSBANDS by HONEYB shows, “You can’t break what you didn’t take.”  Most married people don’t know their wedding vows.”

Mary B. Morrison

Bestselling Author

marymorrison.com

Do Single Women Prefer Married Men? Hot NEW AbiolaTV Video on Single Women, Married Men and Cheating.

Hey Rockstars!

There’s been lots of cheating, lies, adultery and infidelity in the news lately from golfer Tiger Woods of course to politicians like John Edwards to ministers like Ted Haggard and even stylist Misa Hylton telling her truth on fallout from Diddy’s past “transgressions.” And then of course  news of Swizz Beatz and Alicia Keys engagement after wife Mashonda had to write an embarrassing open letter about their alleged cheating.

And Joe the Bus Driver and Larry the Plumber– we see you jumpin’ off too!!! None of these dudes were caught out there cheating with married women, so the question on the table is:

Do Single Women Purposely Pursue Married Men? Watch…

My Two Cents: For the record I think that it is a 2 way street. Most single women don’t chase married men — it’s the other way around. And men who took the vow need to be the ones most mindful of keeping it.

What do you think?

Roxanna Floyd was a gorgeous woman known for making beautiful black women even more beautiful – Halle Berry, Queen Latifah, Angela Bassett, Whitney Houston. In this video interview we did last fall she demonstrates how women can achieve Whitney Houston’s comeback look. She will be missed.

See you on Twitter @AbiolaTV and AbiolaTV.com. Photo by Christine Chambers.

What? You don’t have any gay besties? Well you can borrow one. Allow him to reintroduce himself — Terrance Dean, author of Hiding in Hip Hop. Your gay best friend is in – to give you the advice you need on Hello Beautiful weekly. But before you meet him, watch this scandalous Abiola and Terrance convo about down low gay sex in hip hop.

Thanks for hanging! See you at AbiolaTV.com or on Twitter @AbiolaTV, Youtube.com/planetabiola or my new facebook.com/xoAbiola. And of course buy my novel  Dare by Abiola Abrams wherever you buy books.

Can I let you in on a little secret? Having met several “reality” TV matchmakers I can tell you that 100% of their personal love, sex and dating lives are in the toilet. So if they claim to have advice and answers so do we. Let’s trust ourselves to know that we have more answers than we think we do!

This week’s topic: Who Pays on Dates? He, She or Both? Abiola investigates…

Who should pay on dates? Are the rules different for first dates? Do you go dutch and split the check? You asked – Does the man always pay? This was so much fun– watch!

WATCH the VIDEO!

And women – no matter what, always have your “mad money” and your ATM card. There are really no shoulds in dating. It’s whatever a couple agrees upon together and if it’s really an issue, do what my friend Kola Boof suggests and go on free dates!

Who Should Pay on Dates? Abiola’s Kiss and Tell TV, Video edited by Kristal Mosley for the Luvem or Leave Em Advice team.

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What do you think?

Diesel Denim by designer Sophia Kokosalaki makes a Black and Gold splash at New York Fashion Week, video below. Do these sexy semi grunge looks for women hit or miss? Do they do the Black and Gold proud? Abiola weighs in…

It’s Fashion Week in New York City and two days ago at 5pm Diesel showcased its Black and Gold line designed by Sophia Kokosalaki. The collection was a blend of street smart mixed denim looks that could easily go from the runway into our closets. Easy, breezy and date-worthy for single goddesses and marrieds alike. However…

The original Mama Cheetah, Cheetah Girls and Catwalk Author & Creator Deborah Gregory to be honored in NYC at Abiola’s Kiss & Tell, the live monthly erotica and comedy storytelling and performance series.

Deborah Gregory is the multi-talented woman who gave birth to the worldwide multi-platform, multi-cultural Disney sensation The Cheetah Girls. Readers and fans can meet the beautiful, brilliant and delightfully over-the-top author, performer and goddess about town in New York City on Tuesday February 16th at Abiola’s Kiss & Tell LIVE at Madame X, 94 West Houston Street. This free Mardi Gras Fat Tuesday event is the second installment of our monthly sex, love and dating reading and performance series.

We plan to cure your Valentine’s Day hangover by honoring the esteemed Deborah Gregory on February 16th. Deborah Gregory overcame a rough start in the New York City foster care system to become an American success story. We can’t wait for her to regale us with her storytelling prowess live on the Madame X stage.

Abiola’s Kiss & Tell Live, a bawdy night of delicious storytelling, starring bestselling authors, comics, bloggers, intelligentsia and professional smut peddlers, takes place on the 3rd Tuesday of every month, from 7-10pm in New York City. With each installment we honor an exemplary diva. The debut show honored erotica film queen Candida Royalle and featured readers ranging from Anna David and Rachel Kramer Bussel to Mo Beasley and Demetria Lucas.

ABIOLA ABRAMS: Ms. Deborah, where did Mama Cheetah come from?

DEBORAH GREGORY: I have always lived in a leopard lair. (laughs) And that is where I created THE CHEETAH GIRLS–LITERALLY. I had forced myself to sit–and think of an idea–so that I could write a treatment to get a book deal but the vision was a synergistic one–once I created it. I saw THE CHEETAH GIRS as a group, story, that could perform in concerts, have a TV show, be books, merchandise–the sky the limit–which it literally became. The sky was the limit.

And the truth is, if I had created that vision with girls who were white–it would have been even bigger, but alas, my vision was always multicultural as that is what drives my stories because at the heart of my sagas is a girl from New York–in other words, just another girl on the IRT! So if I can see the girl on the IRT–then she become someone I can write about it–and in New York, you literally interface with people from every culture on the planet. I love that!
ABIOLA: Tell me more! What was your cheetalicious inspiration?

DEBORAH: I was lounging at home in my leopard PJs. laying on my leopard bedspread, propped up on my leopard pillows, wracking my brain trying to think what I would call my girls. I wanted to be a singer really bad when I was younger—used to whip up clothes that I sewed by hand and stand in the mirror pretending to be a singer.

My dreams were never dreams that I thought could come true; they served more of an escape from the extremely painful existence of growing up in foster homes with people who were mean to myself and other foster kids. Nonetheless, by the time I became a writer, and knew that I wanted to write something for the girlies, the editors at Disney Publishing approached me to come up with an idea while I was a columnist for Essence magazine, penning an entertainment news column called “Chit Chat and All That.’’

Once I wrapped my mind around the idea of a group of girls forming a singer group I still had to figure out, Who would they be? What would they look like? What would they call themselves? Then just like in the Wizard of Oz, I realized that I had the answer all along, right at my heels. Who was I trying to fool? Just go with what I know! I guess you could say I created THE CHEETAH GIRLS right out of my leopard lair!

Abiola: Fabulous! Did you expect THE CHEETAH GIRLS to be such a huge worldwide sensation?

Deborah: While I didn’t expect THE CHEETAH GIRLS to become so international, I did precisely envision it to have all the “legs” it had–I saw it from the moment I created it as something that would be books, movies, concerts, merchandise. My model for it was THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY. I loved the idea of a fake singing group—and seeing behind the microphone.

Abiola: Aha. And you are also a performer right?

Deborah: Yes, I’m a natural performer. Alas, I have been caught up in writing. I have performed parts of my one-woman show and stopped after my beloved playwright teacher, Rita Nachtmann died of cancer. She told me, to finish my show–but I didn’t. I have not faced how truly devastated I am about her untimely death. I will have to face all this–and move on.

Abiola: You are absolutely an inspiration. What’s next for you besides reading at Abiola’s Kiss & Tell Live?

Deborah: As you know, I created a new book series called CATWALK.The second book in the series–CATWALK: STRIKE A POSE has pounced onto bookshelves. Right now, I’m in development with TEEN NICK NETWORK to turn CATWALK into a tv series! And I will write the third novel in the CATWALK trilogy–CATWALK :RIP THE RUNWAY. Then I’m going to decide what to write next–I have been working on an adult novel for ten years! My website is: www.cheetahrama.com.

Abiola: Thank you, Deborah Greogry! I am very much looking forward to your reading next Tuesday February 16th at Madame X. You are the most incredible of all of your characters. That’s why we chose to honor you for February’s Kiss and Tell Live. You are beyond a survivor. Thank you for your work. Continued success!

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