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Bride and Bridesmaid

Source: digitalskillet / Getty

There are any number of outrageous requests that a bride might ask her bridesmaids while she’s prepping for her big day. However, nothing takes the cake like the mess we just heard about.

Can you say, “You tried it?”

An exhausted bridesmaid admitted to MammaMia.com that she’s seriously considering backing out of her friend’s wedding after the bride-to-be tried dipping a little too deep into her time and bank account. Hoping to keep the drama to a minimum, she’s keeping herself anonymous (we’ll call her “May”), but she definitely named the bride.

May revealed that not only did the bride, Caroline, pick a $550 dress for her bridesmaids, she also went way over budget on her own dress.

“Caroline had finally found a stunning satin Marchesa wedding dress that she looked perfect in. The only problem was it cost twice her dress budget–$10,500,” May wrote to MammaMia.com. “After many ‘dooo itttt, you should totally splurge, you only get married once’ reassurances for her many bridesmaids, she decided to purchase it.”

While May was glad to have her weekends back, she was not prepared for what came next. Her friend sent a group email titled “Bridesmaid dress contribution” and asked them all to shell out about $150 each for her dream dress. For those keeping track, her wedding dress budget was already more than $5,000!

According to May, the bride pleaded that it would “mean so very much to her and would mean that as she walked down the aisle, she’d be wearing something we’d all had a part in.”

There’s a lot of things you can ask your bridesmaids to do for you, but this is most definitely not one of them.

For anyone that’s confused, here are a few things you can (and cannot) reasonably ask your bridal tribe.

Sure, Girl: Cover Your Expenses

Planning weddings are expensive enough as it is, so it’s usually expected that bridesmaids will cover the cost of their dresses, shoes, accessories, hair, and makeup.

You Tried It: Spend Ridiculous Amounts Of Money

This should go without saying, but some brides lose sight of the fact that not everyone has the budget to fulfill their wedding visions. While your bridemaids are paying their major costs, don’t take this as an opportunity to go for more expensive options just because it’s not coming out of your pocket. Your friends have bills and responsibilities, just like you do. Be considerate, or you may put your friends in a tough financial spot. And definitely don’t ask them to chip in for your ridiculously expensive wedding dress.

Sure, Girl: Be Helpful To The Bride

Throughout the wedding planning process, the bride is more than likely going to need her girls to pitch in from time-to-time to help her with a few tasks. And on the wedding day, she is going to need all the help she can get. Don’t be afraid to ask your friends for a little help if you really need it. They probably won’t mind lending a hand because they don’t want you stressing out even more than you probably are.

You Tried It: Become My On-Call Personal Assistant

Just because your friends want to help you, don’t expect them to be at your beck and call 24/7. They have lives and jobs, too. So, if you’re tempted to call them at 2 AM and request they draft a spreadsheet of wedding flowers by color, availability, and price, don’t.

Sure, Girl: Stick To The Aesthetic

While your bridesmaids don’t necessarily have to dress exactly alike, you probably want them to stick to some general visual points like color and style. When you’re working out hair, makeup, and nails, encourage your bridal tribe to do whatever will be most flattering for them withing your given aesthetic theme.

You Tried It: Drastically Change Their Appearance

Keeping your beauty look on-theme is one thing, asking your bridesmaids to make major changes to their appearance is quite another. For example, if your maid of honor is a natural, let her curls flourish. Don’t expect her to dye her hair a whole new hue and press it out. Also, don’t put everyone on a bridal bootcamp/diet plan to fit into smaller gowns. Leave the motivation to get fit up to them.

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