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For better or worse, ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ is inspiring people to become a little more adventurous in the bedroom. However, there are still some rules your need to remember before getting too caught up in fantasy.

You might never have considered busting out a blindfold or handcuffs before the film came out, but if Mr. Grey has inspired you to play around with bondage or dominance and submission (BDSM), there are some ground rules to consider. It’s easy for replay to go way left if both partners are not on the same page about what they want and what is acceptable.

All the same rules about safe sex still apply while indulging in this particular fantasy, but bringing bondage into the mix adds another layer of consideration that must not be taken lightly.

In BDSM, the Submissive has a lot more control in how things play out than it may initially appear because their boundaries set clear limits. Speaking from experience, there are seven things that every couple (Dominant and the Submissive) should keep in mind to ensure that their steamy BDSM sessions are still safe so everyone can have a good time.

1. Establish Consent
Before anyone gets blindfolded or restrained, it should be perfectly clear that both parties consent to what it about to occur.

2. Use Safe Words Or Signals
Some fantasies do include playing with the idea of non-consent. In this case, telling someone “no” or “stop” may not clearly express a problem as it could be considered part of roleplay. The Dom and their Sub should establish an easy to remember safe word or signal before the games begin.

3. Use The Power Of ‘No’
In instances where saying “no” will suffice to bring everything to a stop, Subs shouldn’t be discouraged from being clear about what makes them uncomfortable.

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4. Know Your Toys
If you intend to use props other than a blindfold, you need to have an idea of how to use them safely. Even with something as simple as rope, the users must know how to tie someone up without getting their partner too tangled up. It would also be a good idea to have a pair of scissors or a handcuff key nearby as a precaution, should you need to get your partner out of a compromising position quickly.

5. Know Your Body
A little pain can be pleasurable, but no one wants to lose body part behind it. Couples should be aware of which parts of the body are more vulnerable to nerve and tissue damage so that they don’t overdo the bondage element of their roleplaying. For example, you wouldn’t want to tie your partner’s wrists too tightly because you could risk cutting off circulation in their hands and fingers.

6. Establish Boundaries
There is only so far that your partner may be willing to go during play time. A good Dom will find out what their Sub’s limits are beforehand and will not push those established boundaries.

7. Have A Plan For Play Time
A Dom should have a general idea of what they want to do with their Sub before a given meetup begins. This isn’t to say that a couple shouldn’t be free to explore while they’re together, but it’s not a bad idea of how they want to play during a given session because this keeps them prepared for any safety concerns that may arise.

Ultimately, BDSM play is about establishing a certain level of trust and respecting it. Keep that in mind when making decisions about how you want to get down, and many of these rules will become habit in the bedroom.

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