I can’t really give you a solid explanation because the reasons are many and range from everything to the way way they talk to their unintentional captivating presence when they hit the room, but I love hood boys.
As a teen from a conservative, suburban part of town, I refused to date boys from my high school or any of the others in the county, denying them anything remotely more than a platonic friendship. We had a few cuties who I knew would probably graduate and become something grand, but the fact that they drove Honda Accords and not Box Chevys was a major turnoff to me.
Every weekend, my BFF and I would make our way about 30 minutes to the more colorful side of town where there was a surplus of “urban” guys. Instead of cheering on our home team of mostly squares, we found ourselves in the bleachers of Laney or Josey High. We were both amazed and envious that their concession stands had Roger Wood sausage dogs and that their dance team performed routines to the Ying Yang Twins’ latest single.
After the game was just as much of an occasion as the actual game. Boys decked out in Nascar jackets (that was the thing then), matching fitted caps and fresh Jordans took to the parking lot to post against their rimmed Impalas and Cutlasses with Lil Boosie, Gucci Mane and Yo Gotti thumping from the speakers. They loved us and we loved them!
I was a social butterfly with an image more along the lines of a Black Taylor Swift: well-mannered, funny and charismatic with a hint of dorky. But I was also very private and didn’t offer to disclose details of my weekend happenings in Richmond County. So when word got out, on the few mysterious occasions that it did, that I was talking to number seven on Josey’s basketball team, or the dope boy in Barton Village, my all-American peers were very shocked—understandably so.
I figured I’d one day grow out of my ghetto boy phase, but when college rolled around, I found myself still attracted to those same rough-around-the-edges gentlemen. I even dated one or two dope boys in college, but soon realized it was unacceptable and a major jeopardy to my future; so I committed to sticking to those who were actually enrolled in school with legitimate part-times but still had that “humble beginnings” factor.
And to this very day, not to my or any of my close friends’ surprise, I still love a boy from the block. Hood boys just have a special place in my heart. Obviously, as a 25-year-old woman making her strides in the world, I can’t continue riding around with the neighborhood pusher—and I shouldn’t have been doing it a few years back either. There’s nothing wrong, however, with preferring a guy who makes an honest living but who’s cut from a completely different cloth than mine, even though people try to make me feel bad about it. I find their cocky swagger sexy and their ability to take control when needed relieving.
One of my theories for these qualities I love is that a lot of guys from urban communities are used to taking on responsibilities at an early age, some even fulfilling the role as provider for their families. So when it comes to taking care of me and making me feel safe and secure, it’s just second nature.
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I’m not saying that I would still write off all men who grew up similar to me with no concept of struggle; but in my past experience with the one that I did give a shot, he was too passive and didn’t have any kind of take charge factor. One time, we were out and another guy asked for my number in front of him and he did absolutely nothing, literally nothing. That moment painted him as a weakling in my mind, and I couldn’t help but wonder how Tyrique or Donté would have handled that situation. Not saying that you have to get all rowdy in moments of disrespect, because that can be just as bad, but at least take a stance and man up.
Who knows what the future holds? I certainly don’t want to block who God has for me so I’m open, but if he sent a from-the-street-but-now-refined-and-mature mister (like a Sean Carter or Nasir Jones) I’d be super stoked!
Let’s keep in touch! Follow me on Twitter: @VerityReign
So what about you? Are you attracted to certain qualities in guys that are very much your opposite? Share with your beauties!
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