“She is so pretty,” “He is so cute,” “How adorable…” Over time, I have heard many people say these things to their kids, and I might be guilty of saying it more than anyone. While there is nothing wrong with complimenting our children on their looks, we have to realize the effect it can have on a child if we don’t focus on other important values.
Between the media, school and society constantly praising good looks, our children start realizing the importance of physical beauty way too early and often. Parents have to be mindful of the messages they are sending to their children.
Here are some things to think about:
- Children will grow up valuing what we value: If we compliment on looks more than other values, our children will grow up to thinking that looks are the most valued thing in life.
- Society promotes a constant and never-ending chase to be the prettiest, cutest, best-dressed and flyest in town. We will never be able to keep up with this (even as adults) so let’s nip this the bud now!
You can create a healthy self-esteem by complimenting your child on more than just their looks.
Here’s how to celebrate other important values:
- Allow your child to help you with chores, household duties or other things that they are capable of helping with. Make sure to compliment them on how helpful they are. Kids love to feel appreciated and needed.
- Highlight other children in the community doing great things and getting praise for it. Find these stories in your newspaper, magazine or even look for online articles.
- While we can’t control what other say about your children make sure to tell your friends and family to highlight other values your child has whenever they compliment them on their looks.
- Constantly remind your child what they are good at and allow them to be proud. Teach your child to not only say ‘thank you’ when someone compliments them on their looks but to also say something like, “Thank you, I’m a great helper too” or “Thank you, I also get straight A’s at school.”
I’d love to hear your feedback below. Tell me what other kinds of self-esteem building activities you do with your child and let me know which of these strategies you will try.
Tweet @HelloBeautiful and #ChildConfidenceBoost with your tips!
For more, check out Natalie Gouche here!
More From MommyBeautiful:
Listen To This Playlist When You’re Complimenting Your Little One!
Also On HelloBeautiful:
Celebs Tweet Their Thoughts About #JusticeForSandraBland
1. Jesse Williams
#SandraBland's treatment while attempting to travel freely on HER public roadways has been acknowledged as unlawful. She is already dead.
2. Taraji P. Henson
"SAY HER NAME #SandraBland"
3. Ava DuVernay
"'Why are you arresting me?' Because you know your rights. Because I can. Because no one'll believe you. #SandraBland"
4. Kim Kardashian
#WhatHappenedToSandraBland We need answers!!!! This is NOT ok! This is all shady! They need to own up to this & tell the truth!
5. Jussie Smollet
"A loss 4 words. #SandraBlandMatters #BlackLivesMatter 👈🏿tell me this should change once the nation shows that we do. "
6. Snoop Dogg
🙏🌹. Sandra. Rip. 🌹🌹
7. K. Michelle
R.I.P to this queen. This could've been any of us. My prayers go out to her family. #sandrabland https://instagram.com/p/5fvlO_AhCf/
8. Gabrielle Union
SAY HER NAME!!! #SandraBland #SandraBland #SandraBland #SayHerName
"We must get to the cause of #sandrabland death because this CANNOT happen again #deathorfreedom"
10. David Banner
"When will we fight back. A man's duty on earth is to protect women and children. Where are the gangsters? Preachers? We need you. Please."
11. Nicki Minaj
"Rest In Peace #SandraBland"
12. Talib Kweli
"We the people ask @LorettaLynch to investigate #SandraBland #KimberleeRandleKing RETWEET "
Signs. Signs. Signs all around us. The Message is Here. #SandraBland
14. Missy Elliot
"When I look at the #SandraBland traffic video it brings so many emotions😳😢😡😡😤!"
15. Jessie J
"God bless your soul Sandra | #sandrabland | Change needs to come |Justice needs to be served | Heart… https://instagram.com/p/5fV79mQ0aw/ "
16. Jackee Harry
"It's time y'all, it's time.." #SandraBland #BlackLivesMatter
"In memory of #SandraBland these things don't make no kinda sense "
18. Holly Robinson Peete
I really don't look forward to having ANOTHER difficult conversation w my kids tonight...but here we go again😧💔 #SandraBland #SayHerName 😢
19. Jeffrey White
Sadly, doesn't matter by whose hand she died. Unjustified arrested set the outcome in motion. The state murdered her. #JusticeForSandraBland
Sandra could have been your mother, sister, aunt, friend or if she wasn't killed the community outreach advisor A&M. #SandraBland
21. Joan Smalls
"My heart is broken. Sending my deepest condolence to her family and friends. May you find Strength, Peace and Justice. When will this stop? #EqualityForAll #RIP #Why #SayHerName
22. Gladys Knight
Sandra Bland.... #SayHerName #SandraBland
23. Cara Delevigne
Things need to change NOW #SANDRABLAND #Justice #Equality
24. Meek Mill
"Rip to that young lady that lost her life about a traffic stop! 🙏 ima make sure I pray for her and her family! 🙏😄😄😄"