Demetria L. Lucas, the real-life Carrie Bradshaw and relationship guru to millions of women doles out her signature brand of advice for enjoying the single life with her new book, A BELLE IN BROOKLYN: The Go-to Girl for Advice on Living Your Best Single Life (Atria Books – June 2011; $24).
As a popular, award-winning blogger, life coach and editor for Essence magazine, Demetria L. Lucas has seen it all regarding dating and love—as both a relationship chronicler and as a professional woman navigating the waters of singlehood in New York City. Recently named one of Essence.com’s “40 Fierce & Fab Under 40” and with stints as a guest panelist at Harvard, Princeton, New York University and Spelman College, Lucas, the go-to girl for the what-to-dos and the what-not-to-dos in relationships, is committed to empowering young women by helping them redirect their focus from obsessing about Mr. Right to enjoying the actual experience of dating and the possibilities it holds.
Now, in A BELLE IN BROOKLYN: The Go-to Girl for Advice on Living Your Best Single Life this real-life Carrie Bradshaw celebrates the joys of her single status while offering bits of experience and effective tools for finding a great mate. Through a series of candid personal anecdotes that reveal several “a-ha” moments by Lucas and the no-holds-barred opinions shared by her Male Mind Squad—a group of men who give their take on everything from female independence and monogamy to sex and commitment—the book is a treasure-trove of stories and information that is certain to make even the most jaded single smile in solidarity with Lucas.
Over the years, Lucas has shared her signature brand of dating advice on media outlets such as TV One’s Access Hollywood, The Oprah Radio Show, and The Tom Joyner Morning Show and in A BELLE IN BROOKLYN, she does not disappoint as she helps women embrace the single life—with or without the perfect man. As the confidante of many and as a keen observer of the dating dynamic, some of the tidbits of wisdom Lucas shares include:
- Men talk about relationships constantly—just not with the woman they’re dating.
- Your salary or degrees are a non-factor in their decision to consider dating you, marrying you, having sex with you, treating you well, or replacing you.
- Good men make bad mistakes. There’s a difference between a moral failing and a mistake. Forgive mistakes. Get rid of moral failures.
- To women, playing detective is generally harmless but men interpret casual inquisition as character assassination.
- Men like compliments. They respond like dry plants to water when you tell them they look nice, smell nice, did something well.
- Sex can be just an activity, like eating a sandwich or going to shoot hoops. Just because a man has sex with a woman, it doesn’t mean he feels anything for her.
Intriguing and highly entertaining, A BELLE IN BROOKLYN is an accessible read that captures what most women are dying to say but don’t have the courage to do so. With her unapologetic and spot-on-honest style, Demetria L. Lucas illustrates that being single is not a death sentence and can be quite enjoyable.
Demetria L. Lucas is the woman behind the award-winning blog, ABelleInBrooklyn.com, where she muses daily on dating, relationships and pop culture. A life and relationship coach, she is also the Relationships Editor at Essence magazine where she pens a monthly dating advice column, Dating Guide, and selects sexy, eligible bachelors for “Single Man of the Month” and the annual “Do Right Men” issue. In 2010, Lucas was profiled in a Washington Post feature story where she advised single women “not to think about the dire statistics and well-publicized odds against them but to, instead, focus on possibilities.” Prior to joining Essence, Lucas was a freelance writer for People, Vibe, XXL, Black Enterprise and ESPN The Magazine. She is a graduate of the University of Maryland, College Park and earned a master’s degree in journalism from New York University. Lucas currently lives in Brooklyn.