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I can honestly say, hands down, I have the best group of friends. We have been through it all, from cheating on tests in school, sneaking out of the house in high school, and now raising our children together. But there is for some reason a new type of friend that has been plaguing me lately: the “girlfriend.”

I know what you are thinking: my friends are my “girlfriends.” Let me break it down for you. There are friends, and then there are friends who treat you like their boyfriends. You know exactly what I am talking about, ladies. The friend that genuinely gets angry when you don’t instantly return their phone calls, or acts as if you broke some type of law if you hang out without them. Their whole world surrounds you, and for the life of you, you can’t figure out how to shake this chick! I mean damn, do I have “help wanted” written across my chest?

Friends should not take all of your energy. You have to put some on reserve for your man when you deal with a “girlfriend” type of friend because you find yourself putting in the same amount of energy into your friendship as you would with your man. You make sure she doesn’t feel left out, so you are constantly calling to see if she wants to go with you. When she’s angry about something minor, you have to sit and listen to hear whine about why your neglect is affecting your friendship. Ugh… ew already.

I have experienced this so many times in my life that I have found the key to avoiding this whole unnecessary situation: keep the friends you have! No new friends. Put people in their categories. At the top are your hardcore “girls.” The friends who know you so well they can order food for you without even talking to you. Those friends you nurture and invest time and care into. Then there are your “friends” who you see on occasion. You don’t talk on a regular basis, but the love is there. If you had a party, they would get an invitation.

Finally, you have the associates you randomly see. They were invited to an affair that your “friend” invited them to. You interact with them only by random circumstances. Honestly, ladies, how many people do you need in your life? Don’t things get more complicated when you bring more people into your life? I don’t know about you, but I need people around me who can take some of the stress off my plate – not add to it.

Ladies, do you have some crazy “girlfriend” stories? Please share; we all need a good laugh. And, even better, we need to see the signs before they latch on!

Let’s talk!

Mrs. Layla

blackplanet.com/mrslayla

For 2024’s iteration of MadameNoire and HelloBeautiful’s annual series Women to Know, we knew we wanted to celebrate the people who help make the joys of film and television possible. To create art is to create magic. This year, we spotlight Hollywood Executive’s changing the face of cinema.