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Dear Gay Best Friend,
So, a few weeks ago I was in Vegas with my best friend and this guy started hitting on me. We started talking and it turned out that we were both from L.A. and we hit it off (I’m 21 and he’s 35).
I’ve never been really wild or done anything crazy, but I just went with it and we ended up sleeping together. I fully expected it to be a one night stand, but then he called the next day and asked to see me. I was busy, but I said I could see him that Friday instead, and he said it was a plan. Come Friday he still hadn’t called and so I texted him to see if we still had plans and he said he wanted to meet at 10:30pm at his place. I agreed and went out with some friends that night and then he texted and moved back the time till 11 (He’s Jewish and he was at his parent’s house for Shabat).
So, I get to his place around 11:15 and he obviously expected sex but I said no and instead we just talked and fooled around and I got to know him a little bit (Turns out he’s a bookie. I didn’t see that one coming). A few days later I texted him to see if he wanted to get together again and he said yes and so we made plans for the following Tuesday. He had a basketball game and so he made the time 11pm once again. This time when I got there he let me in and then he went to his office to finish up some work and then he went to take a shower because he had just got back from his basketball game. After he got out of the shower we didn’t talk much but the sex was really good. The next morning he got up at 5am because he was playing in a golf tournament and I started to get up because after all this wasn’t my house and I’ve only seen the guy 3 times but he stopped me and told me to sleep in as long as I wanted.
A couple days later he called but I couldn’t pick up the phone because I was at work. And then a few days after that I texted him to say hi but he didn’t respond at all. I figured he must have forgotten and shrugged it off and than 3 days later I texted him again and once again no response. The next day I texted a third time (so 3 text messages in a week) and this time he responded and said that he was really busy and would text when he could. I figured it was a week before taxes and given that he ran an illegal business he was probably busy doctoring books or something so I shrugged it off. I waited till Friday to text him again and surprise, surprise, no response.
It’s been over a week and a half now since he sent me the text saying he was busy and I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to come off as clingy but I really like him. Is it that difficult to answer a damn text message and say I’m having a really hectic week or is he just blowing me off and should I just delete him from my phone and move on. – I Really Like Him
Dear Ms. I Really Like Him,
And, here we have another young dumb fast ass girl playing grown ass adult games with no damn clue.
Girl, there is a saying about Vegas, and it goes like this, “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!” And, you have about as much sense as a hooker working the stroll in broad daylight in Vegas wearing six inch come-f**k-me pumps, a rabbit fur coat, and a corduroy bra in 100 degree heat.
What the hell you think is going on with you and this man? Oooohhh, girl, I wish I could punch you in the face and knock your teeth into the back of your throat. But, I will refrain and pray for you.
You stated that on the third time of you being with him, having sex with him, and staying overnight at his home, that you got up the next morning because all of a sudden you got some morals and values and didn’t think you should stay while he was leaving at 5am to go play golf? Please, please, please somebody make it stop! You are a trick and that is why you’re being played. Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids. And, you are a big ass 21-year old kid with special needs. Stop drooling and put your bib on.
I can’t believe that you are asking me why is he ignoring your text messages, and literally, you’ve only been seeing this 35-year old man for only a few weeks. DUH! I need to clean your cage and feed you some more rabbit food. Think about it Ms. Don’t-Have-A-Clue-Staring-Me-Right-In-The-Face, you’ve only seen the man three (Count them one, two, three times!), and, all three times you have been intimate with him. You are a hoe! A freak. And, any man who is able to bed a woman on the first date, and subsequent dates thereafter, then he is not going to be obligated to you. He is not taking you serious or thinks highly of you. And, I really want you to think about this. Have you noticed that you do most of the calling and texting, and when he does respond it’s always to come meet him at his house? Hold up, let me get my guacamole and chips before you answer this.
Okay, I’m back. Now, Ms. Bird Brain, every time you two link up it’s at night, and it’s always after 11pm. (* *) Blank stare at you!
Here are two scenarios of what’s going on: One, any man who tells you to meet him at his house after 11pm, uhm, boo boo, you are a booty call. He is not trying to wife you, make you his girlfriend, or even take you serious. You are being used for sex.
Two: He possibly has a girlfriend and she works at night, most likely at 11pm, and when she’s gone, guess who he calls to come over? I know you’re slow, so I’ll give you time to think about it. Think…about…it. Think…about…it.
Do you love yourself? Do you like you? Do you think you have something to offer other than what’s in between your legs? If you answered yes to all of the above questions, then you should love yourself enough to walk away while you still have some dignity.
Look, Ms. I Really Like Him, you met an older man in Vegas, and because you wanted to “explore” your wild and adventurous side you dabbled and got caught up. SMDH! You were the young tender that he was able to knock the boots, and now you’re feeling the Jewish Kosher meat. Girl, did you pray over the d**k before he served it to you? And, I know he is uncut, because they are not circumcised. Ole sausage meat with foreskin. Girl, move on with your life and stop feigning for this man. He is not interested in you. Let what happened in Vegas remain where it happened. Don’t bring that mess to your doorstep. Chalk it up as a lesson learned. You had a fun time, and that’s that. But, your ass went and got sprung and let it get out of hand. If you don’t know how to gamble, keep your ass out of Vegas and let the real players play. Chile, you have crapped out, lost the roulette wheel, showed your hand in poker, and lost all your money. I can’t! And, don’t be surprised if he does respond or hit you up out of the blue asking what you are doing, and that you should come over to his house, but of course it will be after 11pm. And, you’re going to run your hot in the pants self over there because you need that Kosher meat in your life. Chile, miss me and that scooter you’re riding on. You better get you some sense in your head and stop giving head. – Straight From Your Gay Best Friend
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Make sure to get your copy of my new book, STRAIGHT FROM YOUR GAY BEST FRIEND – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Work, and Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden – October 2010; $15). It is available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, HERE!